WEBVTT

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Well, this explains itself.

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We were talking about
this earlier, actually.

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This is titled Thank
you, antidepressants.

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Reader, let me tell you how I
keep it together, friendships

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and antidepressants.

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Long walks on the beach with H,
he pretends these are workouts.

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And Nutella in bed
with R, she sends,

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boil the water you better
have chocolate from her car.

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And endless voice
notes with L, she

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calls them personal podcasts.

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And WhatsApp stickers on demand
from F, it is time to milf,

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said her sticker with my
face and red lips on my 40th

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birthday.

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And rants with H,
another H, about weight

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and the lands that
spit us out and talks

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under midnight bougainvillea
with R, same R,

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about our mothers'
and children's rage

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and daily morning phone calls
with L, another L, about nausea

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and skin and food allergies
she's sure she's got,

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though no doctor can confirm.

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And I say, if you think you
got it, then you got it.

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You got it.

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And jokes across continents
with H an other, other H

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about impossible geographies.

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And arguments with M
about whether we got

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married in 2005 or 2006.

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And I say, our
first married summer

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was a year before the war.

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And he says, no, no, it
was the summer of the war.

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And we laugh at how we measure
time with pain, but not

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without tenderness.

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And conversations with G,
better name this one God,

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about my dislike for
organized religion.

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And more voice notes with
H another other, other H

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about the opposite of grace.

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This happens daily.

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So thank you friends who are
there when the sadness comes

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or when my teeth fall apart.

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My teeth tend to do
that bi-yearly, friends

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who unscared me of
antidepressants,

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who reassured me I won't become
another Z or my grandmother.

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And yes, thank you,
antidepressants.

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And you, reader,
who stayed with me

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and might be wondering why
so many of my friends' names'

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first letters are the same,
and the answer is when

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I said together in the
first line of this poem,

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I did not mean it
against fragmentation.

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[APPLAUSE]

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