WEBVTT

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This is called, Can I
Do An Angry Orchard?

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I made friends
with this bartender

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in New York named Charlotte.

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And when she figured
out I was a poet--

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maybe it's useful to
say that she's Irish--

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she said, I would like you
to write a poem about me

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killing everyone in the bar.

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[LAUGHTER]

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I ended up writing three
poems because I wrote two,

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and she didn't think they
got her personality right.

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[LAUGHTER]

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She's like, I'm a
lot meaner than this.

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I'm not going to read all
three, but I'll read this one.

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Can I do an angry orchard?

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A gentleman in robotics
asked me how I'd

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feel if my poems killed people.

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I said, well, if my poems were
on several thousand pagers

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and everyone carrying the
pagers were reading my poems

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or one poem of mine, and
someone pushed a button

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and blew them all up, I'd
be pretty fucking pissed.

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But I don't write
propaganda, as far as I know.

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That said, if I heard someone
decided to kill themselves

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after reading or listening
to one of my poems,

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that would just be pain.

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But I'd want to know a
little more about the person

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in the situation before figuring
out if it was really our fault.

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Me in the poem.

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Good answer, the gent
in robotics said.

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I want to be using
what I know to help

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people who need new body parts.

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But I bent to tech,
and everything I do

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goes into weapons.

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This conversation occurred
somewhat early this morning.

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It wasn't at the Penny Farthing,
which is too bad because while I

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felt sympathy for this guy and
we went on to have a fairly

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rational conversation on global
politics and late '90s protests

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of the World Economic Forum,
the International Monetary Fund

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and the World Bank, the kind of
conversation you might imagine

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a 25-year-old roboticist and
a 52-year-old poet could have,

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suddenly and amiably sitting in
an establishment and deciding

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not to be strangers.

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But the gent in town
from Jersey for a seminar

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does have the ability
to make his own choices.

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If we had been at
the Farthing, I

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could have introduced him to
Charlotte, having first said,

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Charlotte wants to murder
the Penny Farthing universe.

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Can you help her?

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And if you can help her,
can you make sure it all

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goes down when I'm not around?

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[LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE]

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So that's part of a trilogy.

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