[APPLAUSE]
So I only printed out page 2 of my introduction.
I realized when I showed up here.
So I'm reading from my computer like a fool, with my apologies.
Also, my apologies in advance for going a little hard
with this intro.
If you ask me to do it, then I'm going to do it.
So hi.
I'm Ander Monson, and I teach in the MFA program here at UA.
We have a lot of traditions in our program.
But maybe my favorite one is bringing back our alums
to read in this beautiful space, the Poetry Center, that
means so much to our program and our students, and, of course,
to you all gathered here tonight in this moment.
The space is a meaningful one to us for what it represents,
a celebration of writing and the writing life.
The largest and most visible work of our students.
It's also, though, a celebration of freedom,
of expression of speech, of thought of beauty,
of disagreement, of complication, of nuance,
of rat-interrupted sex and of meaning.
The kinds of resistance that art provides.
These freedoms feel, TBH, more than a little bit
under threat at the moment.
That's bad.
But what this also means is that,
if the powers that be consider these things a threat, then that
means that those of us who make these things
are powerful, capable of being a threat.
That means that those of us-- thank you.
That means that those of us who attend these events
are powerful, that our presence here
is a threat to those that try to silence us.
That means that spaces like the Poetry Center,
and the MFA Program in Creative Writing,
and the classrooms in which our creative writing students learn
about this power, how to locate and identify it,
how to wield it, how to control it, or at least hold on to it
long enough to let it speak through us, and of us,
and with us.
This means that these spaces vibrate with power,
as I feel this one does, as we do here together tonight
in this very sentence.
Probably too long, that I am hereby ending now.
So let's pause for a moment to feel that power, what we have
in sharing here in this moment.
Thanks.
So it is one of my personal traditions
to introduce writers who were once my students, via what I've
learned from playing Dungeons and Dragons, the role-playing
game that occupies me and my band
of worthy adventurers many Sunday afternoons.
Thus, to illustrate the true nature
of these giants of literature that we host here tonight,
I will introduce them to you via their entries
in the Monster Manual.
This is second edition Monster Manual.
The core D & D text that holds the secret
of the strange creatures that you might encounter in the world
or in the Poetry Center on nights like this.
From the back, it says, "This is the original source used
by dungeon masters and players to create challenges and combat
scenarios.
So prepare yourself."
In that tradition.
I first present to you, Thomas Dai, clearly a storm giant.
One of the most intelligent and respected true giants
is the storm giant.
These great, generally reclusive creatures
inhabit only out of the way spaces, such as the mountains
of Tucson and Idaho.
Storm giants are contemplative seers
that live in places far removed from mortal civilization.
Most, like Thomas, have pale purple-gray skin and hair,
and glittering emerald eyes, which, as you can see,
he definitely has.
[LAUGHS]
They are benevolent and wise, unless they
are angered in response to which the fury of a storm giant
can affect the fate of thousands.
Their abodes are typically cloud islands.
You can find them in those 60% of the time, mountain peaks,
30%, or underwater, 10%.
And there the storm giants build their spacious castles.
It is probable that the lairs of storm giants,
Thomas Dai's, will have animals as guards and/or pets.
Thomas Dai's dwelling on cloud islands, or mountain peaks
will have one or two rocks, huge birds, which they will also
employ as a riding animal, or one to four griffins.
Those storm giants who dwell underwater
will have two to eight sea lions, which Thomas Dai also
has.
Storm giants like Thomas Dai tend
to wear fine tunics and belted sandals.
When they wear armor, it is usually scalemail,
which there is no need for, I presume, this evening.
They have vision that extends into the infrared spectrum,
which allows them to see through fogs and clouds with ease.
This vision makes them outstanding essayists.
They are good at making books, like the very fine Take My Name,
But Say It Slow, published last January by W. W. Norton
and available over here hopefully.
They are light of foot, especially
considering their size.
They run well.
They are skilled at making traps.
Storm giants are wanderers by nature, disinclined
to settle in one place too long, geographically or
intellectually.
Curious and surprisingly stealthy,
storm giants like Thomas prefer to start any battle from cover,
surprising, beguiling, and scattering enemies with spells.
Unlike other sorts of giants, Thomas Dais
do not typically hurl rocks, for they have
strong aptitudes for magic.
A storm giant is able to hurl a lightning bolt of 8DA once per
day.
All storm giants are able to levitate,
lifting weights of up to 30,000 gold pieces equivalent
in addition to their own body weight.
They are able to breathe normally underwater as desired.
Note that Thomas Dais dwelling underwater
are able to cast lightning bolts and move at normal speed.
When they desire to do so, Thomas Dais
are able to cast any of the following spells:
predict weather, call lightning, control
winds, cultural critique, killer sentences, weather summoning.
Storm Giants are slow to anger.
But when aroused for combat, it is
probable that a storm giant will summon a storm and call
lightning, for this weather is most favored by an angry Thomas
Dai in battle.
Storm giants are not harmed by electrical energy,
even including such discharges as blue dragon breath.
As a result, they are often resistant to workshop criticism,
and are not easily dissuaded from bad ideas in writing.
[LAUGHS]
Often these become good ideas in execution.
They are often responsible for sightings
of lightning bolts streaking across mountain peaks, such
as we've had today.
Some storm giants hold the ability to mark and claim
a mortal humanoid as a thrall, either by cursing them or making
a pact with them.
Perhaps this will happen to you this evening.
Please welcome back to Tucson Thomas Dai.