WEBVTT

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"Brilliance."

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"Maggie's taking care
of a man who's dying.

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He's attended to everything,
said goodbye to his parents,

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paid off his credit card.

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She says, 'Why don't you
just run it up to the limit?'

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But he wants everything
squared away, no balance owed,

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though he misses the pets
he's already found a home for.

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He can't be around dogs or cats.

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Too much risk.

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He says, 'I can't
have anything.'

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She says, 'A bowl of goldfish?'

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He says, he doesn't want
to start with anything,

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and then describes the
kind it may be like.

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How their tails would
fan to a gold flaring.

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They talk about hot jewel
tones, gold lacquer,

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say, maybe they'll
go pick some out,

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though he can't go
much of anywhere.

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And then abruptly, he says,
'I can't love anything I

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can't finish.'

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He says it like he's had enough
of the whole scintillant world.

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Though, what he
means is, he'll never

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be satisfied and
therefore, has established

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this discipline, a kind
of severe rehearsal.

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That's where they leave it.

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Him looking out the
window, her knitting

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as she does, because she
needs to do something.

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Later, he leaves a message--

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yes, to the bowl of
goldfish meaning,

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let me go, if I have
to, in brilliance.

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In a story I read,
a Zen master who'd

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perfected his detachment
from the things of the world

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remembered, at the
moment of dying,

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a deer he used to
feed in the park

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and wondered who
might care for it.

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And at that instant, was reborn
in the stunned flesh of a fawn.

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So Maggie's friend, is he
going out into the last loved

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object of his attention?

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Fanning the vain translucent
of an opulent tail,

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undulant in some
uncatchable curve?

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Is he bronze chrysanthemums?

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Copper leaf?

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Hurried darting?

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Doubloons?

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Icon-colored fins
troubling the water?"

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[APPLAUSE]

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