WEBVTT

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It's good to establish if
we're going to clap or not

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clap after poems early.

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And so we're not clapping.

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That's cool.

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But then don't clap
for any poems, OK,

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because I'm going
to feel like, OK,

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that poem is good and all
the rest of them weren't.

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So we're just-- we're chilling.

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Are there any WW--

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it was WWF when I
was a kid-- but WWE

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or professional wrestling
fans in the house?

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Yeah, really?

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OK, my guy.

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Yeah, when I grew up, that
was what we cared about.

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We watched SmackDown.

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We watched Raw, and so on.

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There were pay-per-view
stuff that you couldn't

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access unless you could convince
your parents to pay money

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so you could watch it.

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Anyway, we all had our
favorite wrestlers,

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and we didn't really
understand that it was fake.

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And so we would practice
the moves on each other.

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This poem, it's the title
poem of the first book,

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and I wrote it
really just trying

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to get some of the language
of professional wrestling

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into a poem.

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The names of the
moves are amazing.

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You'll see.

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And then it ends up spiraling
in the way that good poems do.

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They get away from
you, and they end up

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being about a lot more than you
intended in the first place.

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I think you'll see what I mean.

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It's called "Tap Out."

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"We were vicious.

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Swollen cheekbones,
bruised jaws.

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Forearms chafed raw and weeping.

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The Boston

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Crab.

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The Texas Cloverleaf.

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The Cross-

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Face Chicken Wing.

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One time"-- that's a real
move, Bob Backlund shout-out.

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"One time, Ant wrenched

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my shoulder so hard I
couldn't lift my arm

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for a week.

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Another time, Mike's
brother Daryl tried

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a front-flip slam off
the back steps, landed

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face first in the dirt.

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Wrist bone shot clear

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through the skin and gleaming.

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Mike's dad worked

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second shift at Pratt, so
if we were loud he'd holler

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out the bedroom window,
but there was nothing

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he could do to punish us
we weren't already doing

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to each other.

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And we knew it.

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Like that time

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Daryl showed us his
pistol, a .22 he lifted

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from a friend's house.

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We passed it around,

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weighing it in our palms.

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It was heavier

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than it looked,
but it felt good.

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He put the barrel

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in his mouth and
when we jumped up

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he laughed and laughed.

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'Priceless!' he said red-faced

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and gasping. 'You pussies
almost wet your pants!'

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We learned new moves, new
ways to shock the body

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into miracles of pain.

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The Figure-Four Lock.

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The Vise Grip.

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Every muscle trembling.

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The Tarantula.

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The Camel Clutch.

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Mouth

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pressed against their ear,
hissing 'Tap out, dickhead,

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you're not getting out of
this, you're mine, kid,

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tap out and it'll stop.'

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The Sharpshooter.

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The Hammerlock.

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That sour-hot breath in your ear

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and knowing you won't give
in, you won't give him

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the satisfaction, even
when it hurts more

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than anything, more
than your dad's belt

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blistering your backside,
more than the night

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when Daryl put that gun
in his mouth and the sound

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of it woke the whole
block, so much you grit

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your teeth against the
pain, sharp kneecap

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bearing down on your
chest, elbow torqued

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past its limit, and you
swear you could bust out

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of yourself and look down
at your body, helpless

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and small and trembling,
press your mouth

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to your own ear and
whisper 'Not you.

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Not you.'"

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