WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:00.630 align:middle line:90% 00:00:00.630 --> 00:00:06.900 align:middle line:84% Just after-- just after I finished treatment for cancer, 00:00:06.900 --> 00:00:09.990 align:middle line:90% my kidneys failed. 00:00:09.990 --> 00:00:13.890 align:middle line:84% And so I was on dialysis for a year. 00:00:13.890 --> 00:00:17.730 align:middle line:84% And last July, I received a kidney transplant 00:00:17.730 --> 00:00:19.890 align:middle line:90% from my youngest daughter. 00:00:19.890 --> 00:00:22.710 align:middle line:84% I have four daughters and two sons. 00:00:22.710 --> 00:00:26.730 align:middle line:84% And I think dialysis-- has anybody been on dialysis here? 00:00:26.730 --> 00:00:30.180 align:middle line:84% Is anybody on dialysis or been on it? 00:00:30.180 --> 00:00:32.640 align:middle line:90% It's a big drag is what it is. 00:00:32.640 --> 00:00:35.400 align:middle line:84% And what's interesting to me is that one of the questions-- 00:00:35.400 --> 00:00:37.560 align:middle line:84% I mean there's a psychological thing. 00:00:37.560 --> 00:00:39.690 align:middle line:84% You're sitting here in this chair 00:00:39.690 --> 00:00:41.850 align:middle line:84% and the machine with your blood running through it 00:00:41.850 --> 00:00:43.350 align:middle line:90% is next to you. 00:00:43.350 --> 00:00:45.180 align:middle line:90% And this might be interesting. 00:00:45.180 --> 00:00:47.220 align:middle line:90% We had a fire. 00:00:47.220 --> 00:00:49.980 align:middle line:84% They told us what to do in case of fire. 00:00:49.980 --> 00:00:56.640 align:middle line:84% And what they said was that you disconnect yourself 00:00:56.640 --> 00:01:00.930 align:middle line:84% from the machine and run out of the dialysis facility 00:01:00.930 --> 00:01:02.460 align:middle line:90% and leave your blood there. 00:01:02.460 --> 00:01:05.025 align:middle line:90% 00:01:05.025 --> 00:01:08.010 align:middle line:84% If you need a transfusion, they'll 00:01:08.010 --> 00:01:10.740 align:middle line:84% give you one out in the parking lot. 00:01:10.740 --> 00:01:13.980 align:middle line:84% Well, I happen to be the kind of person-- 00:01:13.980 --> 00:01:16.570 align:middle line:90% I refuse to leave my blood. 00:01:16.570 --> 00:01:18.150 align:middle line:90% I'm not leaving it. 00:01:18.150 --> 00:01:19.620 align:middle line:90% I went in there with my blood. 00:01:19.620 --> 00:01:21.840 align:middle line:90% I'm coming out with my blood. 00:01:21.840 --> 00:01:24.270 align:middle line:90% So it was awful. 00:01:24.270 --> 00:01:27.090 align:middle line:90% It was just awful. 00:01:27.090 --> 00:01:29.430 align:middle line:84% And one of the questions they ask 00:01:29.430 --> 00:01:32.490 align:middle line:84% is I guess if you've been on it about a week-- 00:01:32.490 --> 00:01:38.130 align:middle line:84% I was on it for three days a week five hours each day. 00:01:38.130 --> 00:01:39.210 align:middle line:90% And I also taught. 00:01:39.210 --> 00:01:39.930 align:middle line:90% I taught. 00:01:39.930 --> 00:01:41.330 align:middle line:90% I taught during cancer also. 00:01:41.330 --> 00:01:44.165 align:middle line:90% 00:01:44.165 --> 00:01:45.540 align:middle line:84% And one of the questions they ask 00:01:45.540 --> 00:01:46.830 align:middle line:90% is so how do you like to help. 00:01:46.830 --> 00:01:48.240 align:middle line:90% That's right. 00:01:48.240 --> 00:01:51.270 align:middle line:84% And the question is not that much. 00:01:51.270 --> 00:01:54.270 align:middle line:90% The answer is not a lot. 00:01:54.270 --> 00:01:56.980 align:middle line:84% But anyway, all of these things happen. 00:01:56.980 --> 00:01:59.850 align:middle line:90% It's called "dialysis." 00:01:59.850 --> 00:02:03.840 align:middle line:84% Now in illness, I tend to try to have the medical people fix 00:02:03.840 --> 00:02:10.380 align:middle line:90% the illness and the stuff. 00:02:10.380 --> 00:02:12.420 align:middle line:90% And I want to fix the metaphor. 00:02:12.420 --> 00:02:14.010 align:middle line:90% You know what I mean? 00:02:14.010 --> 00:02:17.260 align:middle line:90% And the idea of kidney failure-- 00:02:17.260 --> 00:02:21.960 align:middle line:84% the kidneys are those things which rid the body of poison. 00:02:21.960 --> 00:02:26.160 align:middle line:90% And I had lost so much. 00:02:26.160 --> 00:02:30.510 align:middle line:84% I had lost so much by this time that I 00:02:30.510 --> 00:02:32.610 align:middle line:84% think my kidneys-- the metaphor was my kidneys 00:02:32.610 --> 00:02:34.780 align:middle line:84% didn't want to lose anything else. 00:02:34.780 --> 00:02:38.880 align:middle line:84% And so it was even keeping that which would kill me. 00:02:38.880 --> 00:02:40.880 align:middle line:90% So I talked to them. 00:02:40.880 --> 00:02:42.470 align:middle line:90% And now I have-- 00:02:42.470 --> 00:02:43.670 align:middle line:90% they don't remove yours. 00:02:43.670 --> 00:02:46.910 align:middle line:84% They just pile another one on top. 00:02:46.910 --> 00:02:49.590 align:middle line:84% So my daughter and I standing together have four kidneys. 00:02:49.590 --> 00:02:52.220 align:middle line:84% You know, I got three and she has one. 00:02:52.220 --> 00:02:56.030 align:middle line:90% But anyway, "Dialysis." 00:02:56.030 --> 00:03:01.790 align:middle line:84% "After the cancer, the kidneys refused to continue. 00:03:01.790 --> 00:03:04.190 align:middle line:90% They closed their thousand eyes. 00:03:04.190 --> 00:03:06.800 align:middle line:90% 00:03:06.800 --> 00:03:10.790 align:middle line:84% Blood fountains from the blind man's arm 00:03:10.790 --> 00:03:14.270 align:middle line:90% and decorates the tile. 00:03:14.270 --> 00:03:17.540 align:middle line:90% Somebody mops it up. 00:03:17.540 --> 00:03:22.970 align:middle line:84% The woman over 90 cries for her mother. 00:03:22.970 --> 00:03:28.310 align:middle line:84% If our dead were here, they would save us. 00:03:28.310 --> 00:03:32.270 align:middle line:84% We're not supposed to hate the dialysis unit. 00:03:32.270 --> 00:03:36.330 align:middle line:84% We're not supposed to hate the universe. 00:03:36.330 --> 00:03:42.170 align:middle line:84% This is not supposed to happen to me. 00:03:42.170 --> 00:03:47.810 align:middle line:84% After the cancer, the body refused to lose anymore. 00:03:47.810 --> 00:03:51.140 align:middle line:84% Even the poisons were claimed and kept 00:03:51.140 --> 00:03:56.810 align:middle line:84% until they threatened to destroy the woman they loved. 00:03:56.810 --> 00:04:00.650 align:middle line:90% In my dream, a house is burning. 00:04:00.650 --> 00:04:06.860 align:middle line:84% Something crawls out of the fire cleansed and purified. 00:04:06.860 --> 00:04:11.630 align:middle line:90% In my dream, I call it light. 00:04:11.630 --> 00:04:17.839 align:middle line:84% After the cancer, I was so grateful to be alive. 00:04:17.839 --> 00:04:23.510 align:middle line:90% I am alive and furious. 00:04:23.510 --> 00:04:27.850 align:middle line:90% Blessed be even this?" 00:04:27.850 --> 00:04:39.000 align:middle line:90%