WEBVTT

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Oh, I'll get off of this
kick here in a second.

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I'll read you one last Brat
that I don't read in schools.

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It's not in my Brats book.

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The editor Margaret
McElderry thought

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it was too gory and horrible to
include in a children's book.

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She may be right.

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It's about a brat named
Filbert Spicer who

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tangled with one
of those machines

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in the delicatessen
that slices things.

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Yeah.

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At the market, Filbert Spicer
peered into the cold cut

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slicer.

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That wicked slicer sped back
and forth across his head,

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neatly shaving, what a shock?

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50 chips or Phil's old block?

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Stopping just
above the eyebrows.

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Phil's not one of
them thar high brows.

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