"You are the grief ant, which is to say that you are not only
a grief ant, but as far as ants go,
and out of all the other ants, you
are the ant who responds with the lowest levels of friction
to my grief, my grief, my grief.
Other ants have limbs and hands of other shapes and sizes.
You are the ant who will not measure my goldfish grief
against my first love grief, against my,
against my life partner grief because you are the grief ant.
If I had an ant payroll, if ants collected themselves
into payrolls instead of other forms of collectives,
you would be on it.
Would have a wobbly place secured forever as grief ant.
But as the grief ant, you do not expect payment.
You simply are the grief ant.
There are not many roles available right now.
There are very few open ant positions these days.
In fact, the only recent openings
of late, the ones that had recognizable titles,
and even these roles were from very many years ago
were ones like meat ant, the ant who knew which cut of meat
was the right one to choose for whatever occasion,
a role that is long since ceased to exist.
And then there was the former lover leadership ant."
[LAUGHS]
Sorry.
It just reminded me of the person that inspired that role.
[LAUGHS]
"The former lover leadership ant,
the ant designated to preside over the table of former lovers
when the time came for all the former lover
ants to come together."
I'm embarrassed now.
[LAUGHS]
"This role too, no longer exists.
But other than that, there have not
been very many occasions that called for specific ants
until all of a sudden, here you are,
grief ant who shows up in the moment of need for a grief ant.
My grief ant who understands matters
of scale with beauty and ease, butterknife and right wild,
from tiny speck of dander to molten lava
filled volcano of grief, from a ringing sensation
in the ear to the loudness of a neighboring guffaw.
You, you as my grief ant, unfazed by the shiftiness,
the mercurial communicative bursts of ludicrous ant shake,
can hold ants in a grieving, quivering, ant shake as if just
another plastic cup of boba.
That would be you.
Thanks be to grief ants everywhere."
Oh, I'm so relieved.
[APPLAUSE]
Thank you.
You're such a kind audience.
I was relieved because last time I read that poem,
I completely lost it and cried.
And then I didn't realize I was going
to get tripped up by the former lover leadership ant.
So that was that.