WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.860 align:middle line:90% 00:00:01.860 --> 00:00:06.840 align:middle line:84% While he was dying of everything inside and out, 00:00:06.840 --> 00:00:11.700 align:middle line:84% I caught in dreams at night some kind of scale or bark 00:00:11.700 --> 00:00:14.070 align:middle line:84% that spread across my face and arms 00:00:14.070 --> 00:00:17.880 align:middle line:84% until I looked diseased and knew myself at last 00:00:17.880 --> 00:00:23.070 align:middle line:84% and found no peace in knowledge after all. 00:00:23.070 --> 00:00:25.800 align:middle line:84% My friend, by contrast, I presumed 00:00:25.800 --> 00:00:30.060 align:middle line:84% to love beyond the physical, beyond the dream. 00:00:30.060 --> 00:00:33.000 align:middle line:84% And as he got cadaverous and sore 00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.220 align:middle line:84% it made me more devoted than I was 00:00:35.220 --> 00:00:38.550 align:middle line:84% in all the days of his untrammeled vanity. 00:00:38.550 --> 00:00:41.820 align:middle line:84% Easy for me to love while he lost hope, 00:00:41.820 --> 00:00:44.670 align:middle line:90% to dream while he lost faith. 00:00:44.670 --> 00:00:47.910 align:middle line:84% Re-entering that endless and unsteady state 00:00:47.910 --> 00:00:50.730 align:middle line:84% a child is made to suffer, having a body 00:00:50.730 --> 00:00:54.330 align:middle line:84% that won't stay put or known, its visage 00:00:54.330 --> 00:00:58.860 align:middle line:84% ranging and deranging and itself at last, 00:00:58.860 --> 00:01:03.600 align:middle line:84% at 12, tufted with fresh atrocities of hair. 00:01:03.600 --> 00:01:07.140 align:middle line:90% Adults forget, but not for good. 00:01:07.140 --> 00:01:11.250 align:middle line:84% My friend stopped talking, wrote a final poem, 00:01:11.250 --> 00:01:14.730 align:middle line:84% having shit for subject and last word. 00:01:14.730 --> 00:01:16.410 align:middle line:90% He said, he's dead. 00:01:16.410 --> 00:01:17.070 align:middle line:90% He's dead. 00:01:17.070 --> 00:01:21.490 align:middle line:90% 00:01:21.490 --> 00:01:24.670 align:middle line:84% One of a hundred people packed on flimsy benches 00:01:24.670 --> 00:01:29.380 align:middle line:84% in a tent agog for antics in a circus animal, I'm bored. 00:01:29.380 --> 00:01:32.980 align:middle line:84% I crave exotic trains of incarnation, things 00:01:32.980 --> 00:01:37.600 align:middle line:84% to swing or sway me, fancy women or a man miraculous. 00:01:37.600 --> 00:01:42.610 align:middle line:84% Instead we get this painful elephant put through his paces 00:01:42.610 --> 00:01:46.120 align:middle line:84% on a red footstool, playing a terrible tuba 00:01:46.120 --> 00:01:50.380 align:middle line:84% or fumbling footman playing the fool, and all around him 00:01:50.380 --> 00:01:53.860 align:middle line:84% hoots and tears swell to wild derision. 00:01:53.860 --> 00:01:55.750 align:middle line:90% And I'll tell you why. 00:01:55.750 --> 00:01:59.230 align:middle line:84% Thanks to a bad road diet and confinement 00:01:59.230 --> 00:02:01.600 align:middle line:84% and his shitty life, the elephant 00:02:01.600 --> 00:02:06.370 align:middle line:84% is defecating now voluminously out his nether end while 00:02:06.370 --> 00:02:10.419 align:middle line:84% wafting all the while in front a coy pink scarf 00:02:10.419 --> 00:02:12.380 align:middle line:90% to win our hearts. 00:02:12.380 --> 00:02:16.360 align:middle line:84% And as he lumbers and revolves saluting everyone, 00:02:16.360 --> 00:02:19.930 align:middle line:84% we see the shit is half the show. 00:02:19.930 --> 00:02:23.470 align:middle line:84% The laughs come out in spatters from the stands. 00:02:23.470 --> 00:02:27.130 align:middle line:84% We can't contain ourselves being ourselves, 00:02:27.130 --> 00:02:30.840 align:middle line:84% already more than we can stand to know. 00:02:30.840 --> 00:02:33.000 align:middle line:90%