WEBVTT

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I'll finish up with three
poems in free verse again.

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Next one is a poem
called Slow Waker.

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I wrote this about 1980.

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I'd just been back to
England, and seen my family.

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Among them my nephew, who was
18 years old and rather awkward,

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in just the same way
I remember myself

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as having been awkward
at the age of 18.

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And he came up to--

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he's living in the
country, but he came up

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to-- it's very nice
of him, to London

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where I was staying to stay
a few days extra with me.

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And in this poem, I'm--

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when I first published this
poem, I called him my cousin.

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I didn't want him to see it, and
feel that he'd be hurt by it.

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And then I thought, oh
dear, what if he sees it

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anyway and recognizes himself?

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He'll feel even worse.

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So I got my brother, his
father to show it to him

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and he's delighted apparently.

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Any attention at the age
of 18 is interesting,

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if you have a poem
written about you.

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Also, I think it's a poem--

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frequently after about
the age of 30 or 40,

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one sentimentalizes the young.

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I can't help feeling myself
thinking, oh, wouldn't it

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be wonderful to be back at that
age, with all that potential

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ahead, with nothing decided?

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That's just what you
hate at that age.

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You hate being potential.

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You hate having nothing decided.

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You want to be
something definite.

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Slow Waker.

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I look at the nephew,
18, across the breakfast.

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He had to be called and called.

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He smiled, but
without conviction.

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He will not have tea.

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Oh, OK.

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If it's no trouble,
he will have tea.

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His adult face is brand new.

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Once the newness
clears up, and it

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has got an expression or
two besides bewilderment,

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he could be a handsome devil.

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He could be a carpenter, a poet.

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It's all possible, impossible.

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The future is not a
word in his mouth.

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That for him is the trouble.

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He lay in bed, caught deep
in the mire between sleep

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and awake, neither
alert nor resting.

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Between the flow of night
ceaselessly braiding itself,

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and the gravelly beach that
our soles have thickened on.

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Nobody has ever told
him he is good looking,

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just that his feet smell.

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He paces through
alien London all day.

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Everything is important
and unimportant.

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He feeds only by osmosis.

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He stares at the glint and
blunt thrust of traffic.

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He wants to withdraw.

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He wants to withdraw
into a small space,

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like the cupboard
under the stairs where

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the vacuum cleaner is kept.

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So he can wait and doze,
and get in nobody's way.

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