WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.830 align:middle line:90% 00:00:02.830 --> 00:00:06.385 align:middle line:84% I guess I should close then with one of my poems. 00:00:06.385 --> 00:00:09.600 align:middle line:90% 00:00:09.600 --> 00:00:10.380 align:middle line:90% "Always Running." 00:00:10.380 --> 00:00:19.190 align:middle line:90% 00:00:19.190 --> 00:00:22.370 align:middle line:90% And in a way, I think it is-- 00:00:22.370 --> 00:00:23.790 align:middle line:90% I mean, the poem is about us. 00:00:23.790 --> 00:00:26.500 align:middle line:84% It's a struggle with history and how 00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:28.910 align:middle line:84% a historic trauma comes down through families 00:00:28.910 --> 00:00:30.830 align:middle line:90% and generations. 00:00:30.830 --> 00:00:38.560 align:middle line:84% But, again, I think, in a way, the speaker becomes returns 00:00:38.560 --> 00:00:42.190 align:middle line:84% to that place in a way, at least I see her doing that. 00:00:42.190 --> 00:00:44.290 align:middle line:84% Maybe the poem doesn't lead you there. 00:00:44.290 --> 00:00:47.650 align:middle line:84% I'm not going to take apart my own poem right here. 00:00:47.650 --> 00:00:50.890 align:middle line:90% [LAUGHS] Because I could use-- 00:00:50.890 --> 00:00:53.840 align:middle line:90% 00:00:53.840 --> 00:00:54.470 align:middle line:90% it goes back. 00:00:54.470 --> 00:01:00.430 align:middle line:90% 00:01:00.430 --> 00:01:02.860 align:middle line:84% That's what I used to do when I would get in places when 00:01:02.860 --> 00:01:08.090 align:middle line:84% I was younger, and I would get into this place of chaos. 00:01:08.090 --> 00:01:10.460 align:middle line:84% I guess some people eat and sit in front of Netflix, 00:01:10.460 --> 00:01:14.130 align:middle line:90% and others do other things. 00:01:14.130 --> 00:01:17.270 align:middle line:90% And I was never a runner runner. 00:01:17.270 --> 00:01:19.620 align:middle line:84% But I remember people running after me. 00:01:19.620 --> 00:01:20.620 align:middle line:90% I would just go running. 00:01:20.620 --> 00:01:23.420 align:middle line:84% It might be 2:00 in the morning or it might be-- 00:01:23.420 --> 00:01:30.380 align:middle line:84% I would just run, because I couldn't do it anymore. 00:01:30.380 --> 00:01:33.770 align:middle line:90% I would let go and I would run. 00:01:33.770 --> 00:01:35.260 align:middle line:90% "Running. 00:01:35.260 --> 00:01:36.760 align:middle line:90% It's closing time. 00:01:36.760 --> 00:01:39.880 align:middle line:84% Violence is my boyfriend with a cross to bear. 00:01:39.880 --> 00:01:43.090 align:middle line:84% Hoisted on by the church, he wears it everywhere. 00:01:43.090 --> 00:01:46.000 align:middle line:84% There are no female deities in the trinity. 00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:48.190 align:middle line:84% I don't know how I'm going to get out of here, said 00:01:48.190 --> 00:01:50.500 align:middle line:90% the flying fish to the tree. 00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:51.730 align:middle line:90% Last call. 00:01:51.730 --> 00:01:54.700 align:middle line:84% We've had it with history, we, who look for vision here 00:01:54.700 --> 00:01:58.600 align:middle line:84% in the Indian and poetry bars somewhere to the left of hell. 00:01:58.600 --> 00:02:01.450 align:middle line:84% Now I have to find my way when there's a river to cross 00:02:01.450 --> 00:02:03.610 align:middle line:90% and no boat to get me there. 00:02:03.610 --> 00:02:06.220 align:middle line:84% And there appears to be no home at all. 00:02:06.220 --> 00:02:10.210 align:middle line:84% My father gun chased by the stepfather's gun. 00:02:10.210 --> 00:02:12.660 align:middle line:90% Get out of here. 00:02:12.660 --> 00:02:15.790 align:middle line:90% I found my father at the bar. 00:02:15.790 --> 00:02:19.690 align:middle line:84% His ghost at least some piece of him in this sorry place. 00:02:19.690 --> 00:02:22.120 align:middle line:84% The boyfriend's convincing to a crowd. 00:02:22.120 --> 00:02:25.090 align:middle line:84% Right now he's the spell of attraction. 00:02:25.090 --> 00:02:28.510 align:middle line:84% What tales he tells in the fog of thin hope. 00:02:28.510 --> 00:02:33.460 align:middle line:84% I wander this sad world we've made with the enemy's words. 00:02:33.460 --> 00:02:36.490 align:middle line:84% The lights quiver like they do when the power is 00:02:36.490 --> 00:02:39.040 align:middle line:90% dwindling to a dangling string. 00:02:39.040 --> 00:02:40.750 align:middle line:90% It's time to go home. 00:02:40.750 --> 00:02:43.450 align:middle line:84% We are herded like stoned cattle, 00:02:43.450 --> 00:02:45.790 align:middle line:84% like children for the bombing drill. 00:02:45.790 --> 00:02:47.890 align:middle line:84% Out the door into the dark streets 00:02:47.890 --> 00:02:52.930 align:middle line:84% of this old Indian town, where there are no Indians anymore. 00:02:52.930 --> 00:03:00.030 align:middle line:84% I was afraid of the dark because then I could see everything. 00:03:00.030 --> 00:03:03.030 align:middle line:84% The truth with its eyes staring back at me, 00:03:03.030 --> 00:03:06.180 align:middle line:84% the mouth of the dark with its shiny moon teeth. 00:03:06.180 --> 00:03:09.510 align:middle line:90% No words just to hiss and snap. 00:03:09.510 --> 00:03:13.320 align:middle line:84% I could hear my heart hurting in the dark years. 00:03:13.320 --> 00:03:14.800 align:middle line:90% I thought I could take it. 00:03:14.800 --> 00:03:16.120 align:middle line:90% Where was the party? 00:03:16.120 --> 00:03:18.510 align:middle line:84% It's been a century since we left home 00:03:18.510 --> 00:03:21.420 align:middle line:84% with the American soldiers on our backs. 00:03:21.420 --> 00:03:26.220 align:middle line:84% The party had long started up in the parking lot. 00:03:26.220 --> 00:03:29.100 align:middle line:84% He flew through the dark, broke my stride with a punch. 00:03:29.100 --> 00:03:30.870 align:middle line:90% I went down and came up. 00:03:30.870 --> 00:03:32.520 align:middle line:84% I thought I could take being a girl 00:03:32.520 --> 00:03:34.560 align:middle line:90% with her heart in her arms. 00:03:34.560 --> 00:03:36.330 align:middle line:90% I carried it for justice. 00:03:36.330 --> 00:03:40.560 align:middle line:84% For the rights of all Indians, we all had that cross to bear. 00:03:40.560 --> 00:03:42.870 align:middle line:84% Those old ones follow me, the quiet girl 00:03:42.870 --> 00:03:46.170 align:middle line:84% with the long dark hair, the daughter of a warrior who 00:03:46.170 --> 00:03:47.680 align:middle line:90% wouldn't give up. 00:03:47.680 --> 00:03:51.090 align:middle line:84% I wasn't ready yet to fling free the cross. 00:03:51.090 --> 00:03:55.860 align:middle line:84% I ran and I ran to the 2:00 AM streets. 00:03:55.860 --> 00:03:58.410 align:middle line:90% It was my way of breaking free. 00:03:58.410 --> 00:04:01.110 align:middle line:90% I was anything but history. 00:04:01.110 --> 00:04:02.850 align:middle line:90% I was the wind." 00:04:02.850 --> 00:04:09.690 align:middle line:90% 00:04:09.690 --> 00:04:10.500 align:middle line:90% Thank you, Joy. 00:04:10.500 --> 00:04:14.310 align:middle line:84% That was beautiful, especially to hear your work 00:04:14.310 --> 00:04:15.510 align:middle line:90% at the very end. 00:04:15.510 --> 00:04:17.459 align:middle line:84% I've never heard that poem read aloud by you, 00:04:17.459 --> 00:04:19.819 align:middle line:90% and it was amazing.