WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.337 align:middle line:90% 00:00:01.337 --> 00:00:03.420 align:middle line:84% I'm going to read the title story from this piece, 00:00:03.420 --> 00:00:07.620 align:middle line:84% and I guess I should say that this book is called 00:00:07.620 --> 00:00:10.380 align:middle line:84% "fictions" by the publisher, Fiction Collective, 00:00:10.380 --> 00:00:14.220 align:middle line:84% but, actually, these little pieces 00:00:14.220 --> 00:00:17.410 align:middle line:84% are all hybrids of some sort or another, 00:00:17.410 --> 00:00:20.730 align:middle line:84% and the piece that I'm going to read, the title piece, 00:00:20.730 --> 00:00:23.760 align:middle line:84% "The Garden in Which I Walk," you know, I actually 00:00:23.760 --> 00:00:26.890 align:middle line:84% argued with some people about whether this was a prose poem 00:00:26.890 --> 00:00:27.390 align:middle line:90% or not. 00:00:27.390 --> 00:00:29.580 align:middle line:84% I actually think of it as fiction. 00:00:29.580 --> 00:00:32.850 align:middle line:84% But this whole book has things that are kind 00:00:32.850 --> 00:00:37.342 align:middle line:90% of uncategorizable, I guess. 00:00:37.342 --> 00:00:40.288 align:middle line:90% 00:00:40.288 --> 00:00:42.400 align:middle line:84% I guess that's a good thing, but, you know, 00:00:42.400 --> 00:00:45.280 align:middle line:90% some may think not. 00:00:45.280 --> 00:00:47.980 align:middle line:84% It's hard for applying for things, 00:00:47.980 --> 00:00:50.140 align:middle line:90% the uncategorizable writer. 00:00:50.140 --> 00:00:54.400 align:middle line:84% Anyway, "The Garden in Which I Walk," 00:00:54.400 --> 00:00:59.500 align:middle line:84% and it's one of those pieces that the title sort of 00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:01.630 align:middle line:90% works into the piece. 00:01:01.630 --> 00:01:04.720 align:middle line:84% "The garden in which I walk is in the shadow 00:01:04.720 --> 00:01:07.870 align:middle line:84% of the forty-story Church office building. 00:01:07.870 --> 00:01:11.050 align:middle line:84% There are peonies, white, pink, mauve. 00:01:11.050 --> 00:01:15.480 align:middle line:84% There are delphiniums, daisies, bamboo grass, chicken-and-egg, 00:01:15.480 --> 00:01:19.630 align:middle line:84% coleus of all colors, forget-me-nots, tiny violas 00:01:19.630 --> 00:01:21.160 align:middle line:90% with yellow centers. 00:01:21.160 --> 00:01:26.500 align:middle line:84% There are sprinklers which mist even the concrete. 00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:30.490 align:middle line:84% There is brownish concrete when wet, otherwise grey. 00:01:30.490 --> 00:01:34.120 align:middle line:84% There is a fountain where water shoots out like a waterfall 00:01:34.120 --> 00:01:36.760 align:middle line:90% into an enormous granite bowl. 00:01:36.760 --> 00:01:40.900 align:middle line:84% There is a statue of a handsome religious leader holding hands 00:01:40.900 --> 00:01:44.290 align:middle line:84% with and looking into the eyes of his dear wife. 00:01:44.290 --> 00:01:47.590 align:middle line:84% There are accompanying bronzes of children dancing 00:01:47.590 --> 00:01:49.600 align:middle line:90% in a circle, very joyous. 00:01:49.600 --> 00:01:51.520 align:middle line:90% There is a slight breeze. 00:01:51.520 --> 00:01:54.520 align:middle line:84% There is a man pushing his bicycle along, 00:01:54.520 --> 00:01:59.140 align:middle line:84% pushing it along gravely, but seemingly without destination. 00:01:59.140 --> 00:02:03.430 align:middle line:84% There are sprinklers which mist even the man's bicycle as he 00:02:03.430 --> 00:02:06.100 align:middle line:90% traverses the narrow walkways. 00:02:06.100 --> 00:02:10.180 align:middle line:84% There is a sharp squeaky sound coming from a nearby traffic 00:02:10.180 --> 00:02:13.720 align:middle line:84% light which reminds me of a car burglar alarm. 00:02:13.720 --> 00:02:15.340 align:middle line:90% There are no burglars. 00:02:15.340 --> 00:02:17.980 align:middle line:84% There are no people coming into or going out 00:02:17.980 --> 00:02:21.350 align:middle line:84% of the forty-story office building (it's Sunday). 00:02:21.350 --> 00:02:25.008 align:middle line:84% There's me walking along in my new black shoes (avoiding 00:02:25.008 --> 00:02:29.140 align:middle line:84% therefore the misting sprinklers) and my black hat. 00:02:29.140 --> 00:02:31.180 align:middle line:84% There is the man with his bicycle 00:02:31.180 --> 00:02:33.610 align:middle line:84% who is now going in the opposite direction 00:02:33.610 --> 00:02:36.730 align:middle line:84% from the first direction in which he had been headed. 00:02:36.730 --> 00:02:40.240 align:middle line:84% There are no bugs discernible to the naked eyeball, 00:02:40.240 --> 00:02:44.830 align:middle line:84% there is a bigger breeze, there is the black hat tilted, blown 00:02:44.830 --> 00:02:48.490 align:middle line:84% askew by the breeze which has now the force of a wind. 00:02:48.490 --> 00:02:52.630 align:middle line:84% There are fat mounds of dirt beneath each clump of flowers. 00:02:52.630 --> 00:02:55.180 align:middle line:84% There are no weeds, no errant plant 00:02:55.180 --> 00:02:59.620 align:middle line:84% growths, no unruly anthills marring these dirt mounds. 00:02:59.620 --> 00:03:01.510 align:middle line:84% There are mountains in the distance 00:03:01.510 --> 00:03:04.960 align:middle line:84% which have jagged peaks like the mountains of Switzerland. 00:03:04.960 --> 00:03:07.180 align:middle line:84% There is snow on some of the mountains 00:03:07.180 --> 00:03:08.860 align:middle line:90% even though it is August. 00:03:08.860 --> 00:03:12.500 align:middle line:84% There is a moderate amount of religious fervor in the air. 00:03:12.500 --> 00:03:14.770 align:middle line:84% There are cars speeding by which are 00:03:14.770 --> 00:03:18.340 align:middle line:84% visible over the ridge of the waterfall-like fountain. 00:03:18.340 --> 00:03:20.530 align:middle line:84% There are minuscule chips of stone 00:03:20.530 --> 00:03:24.430 align:middle line:84% embedded in the concrete over which the fountain water flows. 00:03:24.430 --> 00:03:27.630 align:middle line:84% There is a shadow on the garden from the office building, 00:03:27.630 --> 00:03:31.390 align:middle line:84% an actual shadow from the forty-story office building, 00:03:31.390 --> 00:03:34.870 align:middle line:84% and a figurative shadow, call it historical. 00:03:34.870 --> 00:03:38.050 align:middle line:84% There is a man who is now pausing with his bicycle, 00:03:38.050 --> 00:03:41.140 align:middle line:84% staring idly at the Lady Banks roses. 00:03:41.140 --> 00:03:44.260 align:middle line:84% There is a certain kind of comfort being offered here, 00:03:44.260 --> 00:03:47.350 align:middle line:84% that is to say a certain precious, adorable kind 00:03:47.350 --> 00:03:51.130 align:middle line:84% of comfort that invites you to surrender everything in return 00:03:51.130 --> 00:03:53.890 align:middle line:90% for a nice vanilla cream pie. 00:03:53.890 --> 00:03:55.750 align:middle line:90% There are no pies. 00:03:55.750 --> 00:03:58.210 align:middle line:84% There is instead a profusion of flowers 00:03:58.210 --> 00:04:01.210 align:middle line:84% everywhere in this garden in their perfectly manicured, 00:04:01.210 --> 00:04:04.840 align:middle line:84% well-maintained beds, growing as per arrangement, 00:04:04.840 --> 00:04:07.420 align:middle line:90% according to plan with no weeds. 00:04:07.420 --> 00:04:10.330 align:middle line:84% There is everywhere the grim overhang of the office 00:04:10.330 --> 00:04:13.090 align:middle line:84% building, but then there is also the sky which 00:04:13.090 --> 00:04:15.790 align:middle line:84% is a pale cloudless blue, and the breeze which 00:04:15.790 --> 00:04:19.240 align:middle line:84% accelerated into wind and now is stronger wind, 00:04:19.240 --> 00:04:23.050 align:middle line:84% and the mountains with their little jagged frozen snow caps. 00:04:23.050 --> 00:04:25.990 align:middle line:84% There is me running after my hat, which is dipping 00:04:25.990 --> 00:04:28.120 align:middle line:84% and soaring with a mind of its own 00:04:28.120 --> 00:04:31.900 align:middle line:84% into the fountain bowl where it fills with water and sinks. 00:04:31.900 --> 00:04:35.890 align:middle line:84% There is the bicycle man alerted by the clomp-clomp of my shoes 00:04:35.890 --> 00:04:38.950 align:middle line:84% on the pavement and veering his bicycle toward where 00:04:38.950 --> 00:04:40.960 align:middle line:90% I am running after my hat. 00:04:40.960 --> 00:04:43.550 align:middle line:84% There I am sitting by the side of the fountain, 00:04:43.550 --> 00:04:47.710 align:middle line:84% my arm submerged to the elbow trying for the hat and swearing 00:04:47.710 --> 00:04:50.140 align:middle line:84% loudly with no fear of offending anyone, 00:04:50.140 --> 00:04:52.510 align:middle line:84% having momentarily forgotten about the man 00:04:52.510 --> 00:04:56.500 align:middle line:84% with the bicycle who is now unmistakably moving toward me, 00:04:56.500 --> 00:05:00.280 align:middle line:84% pushing his bicycle which has a creaky wheel. 00:05:00.280 --> 00:05:02.320 align:middle line:90% There is the wind dying down. 00:05:02.320 --> 00:05:05.290 align:middle line:84% There is a penny in the crack between blocks of grey 00:05:05.290 --> 00:05:06.220 align:middle line:90% aggregate. 00:05:06.220 --> 00:05:08.560 align:middle line:84% There is me gazing intently at the penny 00:05:08.560 --> 00:05:12.010 align:middle line:84% because there is the man heading toward me, coming closer. 00:05:12.010 --> 00:05:14.980 align:middle line:84% There is the man offering to retrieve my hat. 00:05:14.980 --> 00:05:17.170 align:middle line:84% There is the man with his arm submerged 00:05:17.170 --> 00:05:19.330 align:middle line:90% to the elbow in fountain water. 00:05:19.330 --> 00:05:22.390 align:middle line:84% There is a mustache on the man, speckled with white 00:05:22.390 --> 00:05:25.480 align:middle line:84% at the very ends as if he had been drinking milk. 00:05:25.480 --> 00:05:27.580 align:middle line:84% There is a blemish on the man's cheek 00:05:27.580 --> 00:05:31.300 align:middle line:84% and some freckles scattered over his nose, only densely, 00:05:31.300 --> 00:05:35.200 align:middle line:84% so not quite scattered but gathered over his nose, which 00:05:35.200 --> 00:05:38.650 align:middle line:84% is to say on his nose which is bulbous at the end 00:05:38.650 --> 00:05:41.630 align:middle line:90% and has medium-sized nostrils. 00:05:41.630 --> 00:05:45.320 align:middle line:84% There is the man's speaking voice which has a slight nasal 00:05:45.320 --> 00:05:48.710 align:middle line:84% quality, though not unpleasant, a slight under-toning 00:05:48.710 --> 00:05:52.730 align:middle line:84% of soprano, perhaps, and some bit, not at all consequential, 00:05:52.730 --> 00:05:57.200 align:middle line:84% of shyness or reticence in his offer to 'fetch the cap.' 00:05:57.200 --> 00:06:00.830 align:middle line:84% There is a kind of old world courtliness about the man which 00:06:00.830 --> 00:06:03.200 align:middle line:84% is evident not only in his diction 00:06:03.200 --> 00:06:06.830 align:middle line:84% but in his eyes which lower modestly away from my rather 00:06:06.830 --> 00:06:10.280 align:middle line:84% blunt gaze into them, blunt because of the wish 00:06:10.280 --> 00:06:13.760 align:middle line:84% to assess the man's motivations, whether he is normal 00:06:13.760 --> 00:06:16.940 align:middle line:84% or up to something unforeseeable, a glint of which 00:06:16.940 --> 00:06:20.420 align:middle line:84% I hope to catch in his eyes which lower and avert. 00:06:20.420 --> 00:06:22.940 align:middle line:84% There he is taking a long piece of string 00:06:22.940 --> 00:06:25.160 align:middle line:84% from the pocket of his dark trousers 00:06:25.160 --> 00:06:28.340 align:middle line:84% and tying the end of the string to the v of a twig 00:06:28.340 --> 00:06:30.680 align:middle line:84% he snaps from a very small acacia 00:06:30.680 --> 00:06:34.580 align:middle line:84% tree growing in the middle of one of the flower beds. 00:06:34.580 --> 00:06:38.210 align:middle line:84% There he is dipping the string with the twig end down 00:06:38.210 --> 00:06:39.920 align:middle line:84% into the fountain and now scraping 00:06:39.920 --> 00:06:42.170 align:middle line:84% my hat, which has the look of a bobbing 00:06:42.170 --> 00:06:44.810 align:middle line:84% eggplant along the bottom of the fountain bowl 00:06:44.810 --> 00:06:47.660 align:middle line:84% which is frothy with bubbling waters. 00:06:47.660 --> 00:06:49.820 align:middle line:84% There is me looking at his eyes again, 00:06:49.820 --> 00:06:53.240 align:middle line:84% just for that brief second that they meet mine before looking 00:06:53.240 --> 00:06:56.570 align:middle line:84% quickly down to his task with the stick and string, 00:06:56.570 --> 00:06:59.990 align:middle line:84% and finding in those eyes nothing noteworthy to report, 00:06:59.990 --> 00:07:02.970 align:middle line:84% only that the pupils don't waver in size, 00:07:02.970 --> 00:07:05.720 align:middle line:84% which I find only slightly disconcerting, 00:07:05.720 --> 00:07:09.620 align:middle line:84% and the eyes themselves hold no expression whatsoever, 00:07:09.620 --> 00:07:12.890 align:middle line:84% I may as well be looking into x's. 00:07:12.890 --> 00:07:15.410 align:middle line:84% There is now a memory creeping into my mind, 00:07:15.410 --> 00:07:18.350 align:middle line:84% just a little hint of something, an image of someone 00:07:18.350 --> 00:07:22.010 align:middle line:84% with the same eyes from a horror film choking a woman, 00:07:22.010 --> 00:07:25.280 align:middle line:84% first the eyes are what I recall and then the thumbs 00:07:25.280 --> 00:07:29.770 align:middle line:84% on the woman's neck which are also very distinctive. 00:07:29.770 --> 00:07:32.870 align:middle line:84% There is the man now reaching into the fountain once more 00:07:32.870 --> 00:07:35.200 align:middle line:84% and this time coming up with my new hat, which 00:07:35.200 --> 00:07:37.270 align:middle line:84% is of course sodden and unwearable, 00:07:37.270 --> 00:07:39.220 align:middle line:84% looking more like a dead animal-- 00:07:39.220 --> 00:07:41.200 align:middle line:90% a rat or a fish-- 00:07:41.200 --> 00:07:44.170 align:middle line:90% than a once perky, beloved hat. 00:07:44.170 --> 00:07:46.840 align:middle line:84% There are the man's thumbs which are similar in shape 00:07:46.840 --> 00:07:49.150 align:middle line:84% to the ones of the horror film murderer 00:07:49.150 --> 00:07:52.300 align:middle line:84% and there is the man smiling very broadly at me 00:07:52.300 --> 00:07:55.870 align:middle line:84% as he holds forth the hat, very proud is his smile 00:07:55.870 --> 00:07:59.050 align:middle line:84% and there is a tooth missing, a bicuspid. 00:07:59.050 --> 00:08:02.260 align:middle line:84% There is also a tear on the man's plaid shirt right over 00:08:02.260 --> 00:08:06.010 align:middle line:84% his heart and triangular so that I can see a section of his 00:08:06.010 --> 00:08:09.400 align:middle line:84% nipple, which is very almost shockingly pink, 00:08:09.400 --> 00:08:10.810 align:middle line:90% like a woman's. 00:08:10.810 --> 00:08:13.480 align:middle line:84% There I am wringing out my hat in the fountain 00:08:13.480 --> 00:08:15.610 align:middle line:84% and thanking the man for his trouble, 00:08:15.610 --> 00:08:17.680 align:middle line:84% careful now not to make eye contact, 00:08:17.680 --> 00:08:20.590 align:middle line:84% but just intent on their wringing motion, which 00:08:20.590 --> 00:08:25.000 align:middle line:84% is the motion of my two fists going in opposite directions. 00:08:25.000 --> 00:08:27.640 align:middle line:84% There is the man sitting on the edge of the fountain 00:08:27.640 --> 00:08:29.620 align:middle line:84% and watching me wring out my hat, 00:08:29.620 --> 00:08:32.440 align:middle line:84% making no attempt to leave on his bicycle 00:08:32.440 --> 00:08:35.679 align:middle line:84% and also the sky is turning a violet color right 00:08:35.679 --> 00:08:38.919 align:middle line:84% over the tops of the mountains and the breeze which 00:08:38.919 --> 00:08:42.429 align:middle line:84% was at first light, then heavy, then slight again, 00:08:42.429 --> 00:08:46.210 align:middle line:84% is at this point picking up so that the man's bicycle jiggles 00:08:46.210 --> 00:08:49.690 align:middle line:84% precariously on its kickstand and then topples 00:08:49.690 --> 00:08:52.720 align:middle line:84% over making a crashing sound which startles me more 00:08:52.720 --> 00:08:54.880 align:middle line:90% than I might have predicted. 00:08:54.880 --> 00:08:58.120 align:middle line:84% There is the man righting the bicycle and, at the same time, 00:08:58.120 --> 00:09:00.580 align:middle line:84% there I am mumbling goodbye to the man and thanks 00:09:00.580 --> 00:09:02.770 align:middle line:84% again, feeling a little squeamish now 00:09:02.770 --> 00:09:05.740 align:middle line:84% and not grateful enough, therefore feeling also guilty 00:09:05.740 --> 00:09:08.650 align:middle line:90% but squeamish nonetheless. 00:09:08.650 --> 00:09:11.650 align:middle line:84% There is a creeping feeling across the back of my neck 00:09:11.650 --> 00:09:13.600 align:middle line:84% and there is my heart pounding and there 00:09:13.600 --> 00:09:15.820 align:middle line:90% is a sky turning navy blue. 00:09:15.820 --> 00:09:19.390 align:middle line:84% There are flowers which are now dark clumps in their shallow 00:09:19.390 --> 00:09:23.020 align:middle line:84% concrete beds, as are the dark silhouetted shapes 00:09:23.020 --> 00:09:27.010 align:middle line:84% of the religious leader and his wife who are so fondly depicted 00:09:27.010 --> 00:09:30.130 align:middle line:84% here, along with the joyous dancing-in-a-circle, 00:09:30.130 --> 00:09:33.340 align:middle line:84% ring-around-the-rosy children from another century, 00:09:33.340 --> 00:09:36.530 align:middle line:84% looking and feeling so peaceful and safe, 00:09:36.530 --> 00:09:39.100 align:middle line:84% peaceful because safe, in that order, 00:09:39.100 --> 00:09:41.080 align:middle line:84% among the gardens of their youths, 00:09:41.080 --> 00:09:43.990 align:middle line:84% which is to say the garden of all of our youths, 00:09:43.990 --> 00:09:47.890 align:middle line:84% so filled as they were with happiness and innocence. 00:09:47.890 --> 00:09:51.640 align:middle line:84% There I am walking among all this beauty and kindness 00:09:51.640 --> 00:09:54.040 align:middle line:84% and benevolence while behind me there 00:09:54.040 --> 00:09:56.650 align:middle line:84% is the unmistakable sound of someone taking 00:09:56.650 --> 00:10:00.190 align:middle line:84% measured steps so as neither to pass nor lag, 00:10:00.190 --> 00:10:02.500 align:middle line:84% also the sound of a creaky wheel, 00:10:02.500 --> 00:10:06.010 align:middle line:84% a kind of rolling along sound with a little glitch in it, 00:10:06.010 --> 00:10:08.920 align:middle line:84% and a clinking chain which is very rhythmic 00:10:08.920 --> 00:10:12.270 align:middle line:90% and to my mind portentous. 00:10:12.270 --> 00:10:15.990 align:middle line:84% There I am walking alone toward the stone staircase which 00:10:15.990 --> 00:10:20.160 align:middle line:84% will take me out of the garden into the real world of traffic 00:10:20.160 --> 00:10:23.280 align:middle line:84% and darkness, where the dark I see from here 00:10:23.280 --> 00:10:27.270 align:middle line:84% over the top of the stairs is solid but nevertheless lit 00:10:27.270 --> 00:10:30.930 align:middle line:84% by the various moving and wavering car headlights 00:10:30.930 --> 00:10:34.560 align:middle line:84% and the more stationary and reliable streetlights 00:10:34.560 --> 00:10:37.410 align:middle line:84% and the occasional flashlight shone 00:10:37.410 --> 00:10:39.930 align:middle line:84% into the all but impenetrable night 00:10:39.930 --> 00:10:45.420 align:middle line:84% by someone who intends to either light our way or blind us." 00:10:45.420 --> 00:10:47.220 align:middle line:90% Thanks. 00:10:47.220 --> 00:10:49.070 align:middle line:90% [APPLAUSE] 00:10:49.070 --> 00:10:52.000 align:middle line:90%