Three.
[LAUGHTER]
An orange and a Slap-Of-Wack bar sit on a counter.
I have vitamin C, says the orange.
So do I, says the Slap-Of-Wack bar.
I have natural fiber, says the orange.
So do I, says the Slap-Of-Wack bar.
You do?
says the orange.
Are you calling me a liar?
says the Slap-Of-Wack bar.
Oh, no, says the orange, politely.
I was just under the impression from reading your label
that you're mostly comprised of artificial colors,
and innovative edible plastic products,
plus high fructose corn syrup.
So I guess I'm not quite sure where the fiber comes in.
Slap it up your rack, shouts the Slap-Of-Wack bar.
He sails across the counter, jutting one pointy edge
into the orange.
Oh, god, the orange says in pain.
You've got an unsightly gash, says the Slap-Of-Wack bar.
Do I have an unsightly gash?
I think not.
My packaging is intact, weakling.
I have 0 calories of fat, says the orange, weakly.
So do I, says the Slap-Of-Wack bar.
Well, how can that possibly be the case?
says the orange in frustration.
You're comprised of 8% high fructose corn syrup.
Slap it up your rack, shouts the Slap-Of-Wack bar and sails
across the counter and digs its edge into the orange
over and over, sending the orange off the counter
and into the garbage can, where it's
leered at by a perverted looking chicken carcass and two
evil empty cans of soda.
Now you have 0 of 0 of 0, says the Slap-Of-Wack bar.
The Slap-Of-Wack bar, says the voiceover,
for when you're feeling wacky.