WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.070 align:middle line:90% 00:00:01.070 --> 00:00:04.870 align:middle line:90% Well, this is called Sorrows. 00:00:04.870 --> 00:00:06.910 align:middle line:84% I've had a lot of losses in my life. 00:00:06.910 --> 00:00:09.580 align:middle line:90% I had cancer four times. 00:00:09.580 --> 00:00:11.710 align:middle line:84% I once had two cancers at the same time, 00:00:11.710 --> 00:00:13.540 align:middle line:90% and they were not a metastasis. 00:00:13.540 --> 00:00:16.390 align:middle line:90% Only I would do that. 00:00:16.390 --> 00:00:19.045 align:middle line:84% They think they're hot stuff, metastasis stuff. 00:00:19.045 --> 00:00:22.600 align:middle line:84% And I had two primary cancers, one breast cancer 00:00:22.600 --> 00:00:25.690 align:middle line:90% and one renal cancer. 00:00:25.690 --> 00:00:30.010 align:middle line:84% And the renal cancer came after I had a kidney transplant. 00:00:30.010 --> 00:00:31.750 align:middle line:84% I was on dialysis for a year, which 00:00:31.750 --> 00:00:34.670 align:middle line:90% I hated more than anything. 00:00:34.670 --> 00:00:38.830 align:middle line:84% And I thought that they took the bad kidney out or the one that 00:00:38.830 --> 00:00:39.837 align:middle line:90% wasn't functioning well. 00:00:39.837 --> 00:00:41.920 align:middle line:84% But they don't, they just put another one in there 00:00:41.920 --> 00:00:43.870 align:middle line:90% on top of that one. 00:00:43.870 --> 00:00:47.110 align:middle line:84% And the one-- that seems to me kind of-- 00:00:47.110 --> 00:00:49.600 align:middle line:84% and they leave the other one there, 00:00:49.600 --> 00:00:54.280 align:middle line:84% and that one developed cancer, renal cancer. 00:00:54.280 --> 00:00:57.310 align:middle line:90% And I was kind of tired of them. 00:00:57.310 --> 00:01:00.600 align:middle line:84% Anyway, I had that, and I have lost two of my children. 00:01:00.600 --> 00:01:01.660 align:middle line:90% I had six children. 00:01:01.660 --> 00:01:03.900 align:middle line:90% I have four living children. 00:01:03.900 --> 00:01:08.260 align:middle line:84% My husband, my parents, my sister, lots of people. 00:01:08.260 --> 00:01:11.040 align:middle line:90% So I know something about loss. 00:01:11.040 --> 00:01:12.840 align:middle line:84% And I know the best thing I can do for them 00:01:12.840 --> 00:01:15.240 align:middle line:90% is to continue to live. 00:01:15.240 --> 00:01:18.900 align:middle line:90% Anyway, this is called Sorrows. 00:01:18.900 --> 00:01:22.050 align:middle line:84% Who would believe them when we need? 00:01:22.050 --> 00:01:25.020 align:middle line:84% Who would believe they could be beautiful? 00:01:25.020 --> 00:01:27.930 align:middle line:84% Who would believe they could fall so in love 00:01:27.930 --> 00:01:32.400 align:middle line:84% with mortals that they would attach themselves as scars 00:01:32.400 --> 00:01:36.240 align:middle line:90% attach and ride the skin? 00:01:36.240 --> 00:01:40.890 align:middle line:84% Sometimes, we hear them in our dreams, rattling their skulls, 00:01:40.890 --> 00:01:44.370 align:middle line:90% clicking their bony fingers. 00:01:44.370 --> 00:01:47.040 align:middle line:84% They have heard me beseeching as I whispered 00:01:47.040 --> 00:01:49.260 align:middle line:90% into my own cupped hands. 00:01:49.260 --> 00:01:52.170 align:middle line:90% Enough, not me again. 00:01:52.170 --> 00:01:53.910 align:middle line:90% Enough. 00:01:53.910 --> 00:01:59.070 align:middle line:84% But how can they distinguish one human voice 00:01:59.070 --> 00:02:02.340 align:middle line:90% amid such choruses of desire? 00:02:02.340 --> 00:02:08.490 align:middle line:90% 00:02:08.490 --> 00:02:11.220 align:middle line:84% I still have Eastern time, so I have to look at it, 00:02:11.220 --> 00:02:12.720 align:middle line:90% and then I have to count back. 00:02:12.720 --> 00:02:14.820 align:middle line:90% It's so hard for me. 00:02:14.820 --> 00:02:16.730 align:middle line:90% I've often thought.