WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.009 align:middle line:90% 00:00:02.009 --> 00:00:08.189 align:middle line:84% This is from my new novel, which is called American Weather. 00:00:08.189 --> 00:00:11.490 align:middle line:84% The title comes from one of the main characters 00:00:11.490 --> 00:00:16.079 align:middle line:84% has a very dark and doomy environmental show. 00:00:16.079 --> 00:00:19.140 align:middle line:84% And at one point, one of the caller-- 00:00:19.140 --> 00:00:22.980 align:middle line:84% callers calls up after there's a segment on climate change 00:00:22.980 --> 00:00:24.937 align:middle line:90% and he says, yeah, yeah. 00:00:24.937 --> 00:00:26.020 align:middle line:90% I've heard all about that. 00:00:26.020 --> 00:00:28.753 align:middle line:84% But what I want to know about is what's 00:00:28.753 --> 00:00:30.420 align:middle line:84% going to happen to the American weather? 00:00:30.420 --> 00:00:33.150 align:middle line:90% 00:00:33.150 --> 00:00:37.095 align:middle line:84% Didn't seem quite as dark when I wrote it couple years ago. 00:00:37.095 --> 00:00:40.140 align:middle line:90% 00:00:40.140 --> 00:00:42.210 align:middle line:90% "Chapter 1. 00:00:42.210 --> 00:00:44.220 align:middle line:84% Someone's flushing antidepressants down 00:00:44.220 --> 00:00:45.390 align:middle line:90% the toilet. 00:00:45.390 --> 00:00:46.270 align:middle line:90% Don't worry. 00:00:46.270 --> 00:00:47.640 align:middle line:90% Not me. 00:00:47.640 --> 00:00:51.360 align:middle line:84% Yesterday, I read that the worms tested in city sewers 00:00:51.360 --> 00:00:56.400 align:middle line:84% had high concentrations of Prozac and Paxil in them. 00:00:56.400 --> 00:01:00.930 align:middle line:84% When city birds ate these worms, they stayed closer to home, 00:01:00.930 --> 00:01:04.470 align:middle line:84% but appeared unmotivated to mate. 00:01:04.470 --> 00:01:08.310 align:middle line:84% But what I want to know is were they happier? 00:01:08.310 --> 00:01:12.030 align:middle line:84% Did they get more things done in a given day? 00:01:12.030 --> 00:01:16.020 align:middle line:84% Because I must admit, my energy is flagging. 00:01:16.020 --> 00:01:20.220 align:middle line:84% You, I think, when the world makes its demands on me. 00:01:20.220 --> 00:01:21.330 align:middle line:90% Again? 00:01:21.330 --> 00:01:24.900 align:middle line:90% Didn't we just do this? 00:01:24.900 --> 00:01:30.090 align:middle line:84% It's entirely possible that my bar for happiness is too high. 00:01:30.090 --> 00:01:33.030 align:middle line:84% For example, I keep thinking about this Swedish peasant 00:01:33.030 --> 00:01:38.580 align:middle line:84% named Jonas Stolt, who wrote this in a diary in 1820, 00:01:38.580 --> 00:01:40.980 align:middle line:84% 'I have known a time when young people were 00:01:40.980 --> 00:01:46.270 align:middle line:84% singing from morning to eve, whether at work or at play. 00:01:46.270 --> 00:01:48.310 align:middle line:90% This is all over long ago. 00:01:48.310 --> 00:01:52.440 align:middle line:84% Nowadays, there's silence everywhere.' 00:01:52.440 --> 00:01:55.590 align:middle line:84% And yet, here my husband stands in the doorway, 00:01:55.590 --> 00:01:58.410 align:middle line:90% sorting through the mail. 00:01:58.410 --> 00:02:01.170 align:middle line:84% 'What do you think will happen if you don't open the bills, 00:02:01.170 --> 00:02:02.670 align:middle line:90% he asks me. 00:02:02.670 --> 00:02:06.330 align:middle line:84% Do you think someone will come and take them away?' 00:02:06.330 --> 00:02:08.009 align:middle line:90% But this is unfair. 00:02:08.009 --> 00:02:10.050 align:middle line:90% I'm not that bad at mail. 00:02:10.050 --> 00:02:15.210 align:middle line:84% Once I sent my ex back one sock, Federal Express. 00:02:15.210 --> 00:02:19.110 align:middle line:84% What kind of sock, one might ask, after hearing that. 00:02:19.110 --> 00:02:22.770 align:middle line:90% But you'd be on the wrong track. 00:02:22.770 --> 00:02:29.340 align:middle line:84% It was a white athletic sock bought in bulk at Target. 00:02:29.340 --> 00:02:31.740 align:middle line:84% My dog brings me her slobber frog 00:02:31.740 --> 00:02:34.200 align:middle line:84% and waits until I throw it for her. 00:02:34.200 --> 00:02:37.920 align:middle line:84% I do and then she brings it back again. 00:02:37.920 --> 00:02:40.200 align:middle line:84% This is a game that has no end and is 00:02:40.200 --> 00:02:42.780 align:middle line:90% played by dogs in heaven. 00:02:42.780 --> 00:02:46.890 align:middle line:84% It is relaxing, except for the slobber part. 00:02:46.890 --> 00:02:50.460 align:middle line:84% When my son comes into the room, I give it to him 00:02:50.460 --> 00:02:52.740 align:middle line:84% and make him take over for a while. 00:02:52.740 --> 00:02:55.560 align:middle line:84% He gives me his folder with the monthly newsletter 00:02:55.560 --> 00:02:57.240 align:middle line:90% from his teacher. 00:02:57.240 --> 00:03:01.860 align:middle line:84% This one features a list of the top 10 fears and phobias 00:03:01.860 --> 00:03:04.740 align:middle line:90% reported by schoolchildren. 00:03:04.740 --> 00:03:06.840 align:middle line:90% Fire isn't on it. 00:03:06.840 --> 00:03:11.700 align:middle line:84% Blood, sharks, and loneliness rank eight, nine, and ten. 00:03:11.700 --> 00:03:14.330 align:middle line:90% 00:03:14.330 --> 00:03:17.240 align:middle line:84% I take the slobber frog away finally and put it 00:03:17.240 --> 00:03:19.400 align:middle line:90% on top of the refrigerator. 00:03:19.400 --> 00:03:24.530 align:middle line:84% The dog watches me warily, her face on her paws. 00:03:24.530 --> 00:03:28.520 align:middle line:84% My husband tells me a good story about the bad coworker. 00:03:28.520 --> 00:03:31.400 align:middle line:84% My son sits on the floor, folding a piece 00:03:31.400 --> 00:03:33.680 align:middle line:90% of plain white paper. 00:03:33.680 --> 00:03:37.850 align:middle line:84% When he sees me watching, he turns carefully away. 00:03:37.850 --> 00:03:40.790 align:middle line:90% 'Don't look, I'm inventing this. 00:03:40.790 --> 00:03:43.340 align:middle line:84% No one will ever know what I've done except me.' 00:03:43.340 --> 00:03:45.920 align:middle line:90% 00:03:45.920 --> 00:03:50.930 align:middle line:84% My number one fear is the acceleration of days. 00:03:50.930 --> 00:03:54.410 align:middle line:84% No such thing, supposedly, but there's not a parent alive 00:03:54.410 --> 00:03:55.370 align:middle line:90% that believes this. 00:03:55.370 --> 00:04:03.550 align:middle line:90% 00:04:03.550 --> 00:04:06.620 align:middle line:84% Later, when I come out of the bathroom, 00:04:06.620 --> 00:04:10.083 align:middle line:84% I asked my husband what he thinks is wrong with my knee. 00:04:10.083 --> 00:04:12.250 align:middle line:84% I hear this little click sometimes when I'm walking. 00:04:12.250 --> 00:04:15.460 align:middle line:84% Just a tiny click like a key turning. 00:04:15.460 --> 00:04:17.980 align:middle line:84% He puts on his glasses to examine it. 00:04:17.980 --> 00:04:19.540 align:middle line:90% 'Does this hurt,' he asks me. 00:04:19.540 --> 00:04:21.370 align:middle line:90% Pressing down hard on it. 00:04:21.370 --> 00:04:22.720 align:middle line:90% 'How about this? 00:04:22.720 --> 00:04:26.470 align:middle line:84% Or this?' I shake my head slowly. 00:04:26.470 --> 00:04:28.610 align:middle line:90% He takes off his glasses. 00:04:28.610 --> 00:04:31.030 align:middle line:84% 'It appears to be knee cancer,' he says. 00:04:31.030 --> 00:04:33.880 align:middle line:90% 00:04:33.880 --> 00:04:37.120 align:middle line:84% But now, I am late for Sylvia's lecture. 00:04:37.120 --> 00:04:39.100 align:middle line:84% The elevator is out again so I gimp my way 00:04:39.100 --> 00:04:41.320 align:middle line:90% down as quickly as I can. 00:04:41.320 --> 00:04:43.960 align:middle line:84% The lady from 1C pokes her head out the door 00:04:43.960 --> 00:04:46.210 align:middle line:84% to complain about the management. 00:04:46.210 --> 00:04:50.890 align:middle line:84% 'These days they'll let anyone be the Super,' she says. 00:04:50.890 --> 00:04:54.710 align:middle line:84% Her right wing sadness showing through. 00:04:54.710 --> 00:04:56.800 align:middle line:90% So late, late. 00:04:56.800 --> 00:04:59.620 align:middle line:84% And this woman on the subway has bought a dress 00:04:59.620 --> 00:05:01.840 align:middle line:90% for a destination wedding. 00:05:01.840 --> 00:05:06.070 align:middle line:90% It is shrimp colored, she says. 00:05:06.070 --> 00:05:10.960 align:middle line:90% I have seven stops still to go. 00:05:10.960 --> 00:05:12.790 align:middle line:84% I put on my headphones and listen to one 00:05:12.790 --> 00:05:15.940 align:middle line:90% of Sylvia's old podcasts. 00:05:15.940 --> 00:05:19.000 align:middle line:84% 'What do you mean, interconnected,' the caller 00:05:19.000 --> 00:05:20.840 align:middle line:90% says. 00:05:20.840 --> 00:05:24.760 align:middle line:84% Well, scientists have found a species of moth 00:05:24.760 --> 00:05:27.970 align:middle line:84% in the forests of Madagascar that 00:05:27.970 --> 00:05:31.570 align:middle line:84% drinks tears from the eyes of sleeping birds. 00:05:31.570 --> 00:05:34.240 align:middle line:90% Hm. 00:05:34.240 --> 00:05:35.995 align:middle line:84% The shrimp lady just got off at Union 00:05:35.995 --> 00:05:37.870 align:middle line:84% and now I'm almost there and running a little 00:05:37.870 --> 00:05:40.450 align:middle line:90% through these dirty streets. 00:05:40.450 --> 00:05:44.350 align:middle line:84% Sylvia is already speaking when I come in. 00:05:44.350 --> 00:05:46.600 align:middle line:90% 'Crises alter morality. 00:05:46.600 --> 00:05:48.640 align:middle line:84% They alter what is demanded of us. 00:05:48.640 --> 00:05:52.780 align:middle line:84% If we are considered to be good, honorable people. 00:05:52.780 --> 00:05:57.580 align:middle line:84% For example, having a picnic in the park is morally neutral. 00:05:57.580 --> 00:06:01.030 align:middle line:84% But, if during your picnic, you witness a group of children 00:06:01.030 --> 00:06:05.620 align:middle line:84% drowning and you continue eating and chatting, ignoring that, 00:06:05.620 --> 00:06:07.240 align:middle line:90% you have become monstrous.' 00:06:07.240 --> 00:06:10.520 align:middle line:90% 00:06:10.520 --> 00:06:13.340 align:middle line:90% Right on, sister. 00:06:13.340 --> 00:06:15.800 align:middle line:84% During the break, the woman sitting next to me 00:06:15.800 --> 00:06:17.570 align:middle line:90% gives me her card. 00:06:17.570 --> 00:06:20.060 align:middle line:84% She tells me she is a lifestyle blogger 00:06:20.060 --> 00:06:23.360 align:middle line:84% who blogs about creative sustainability. 00:06:23.360 --> 00:06:29.480 align:middle line:84% She gives me a card for her website, Apocalypse Wow. 00:06:29.480 --> 00:06:31.700 align:middle line:90% She is not here to see Sylvia. 00:06:31.700 --> 00:06:34.140 align:middle line:84% She is here to see the next speaker, 00:06:34.140 --> 00:06:37.460 align:middle line:84% who it turns out is a white woman wearing a great deal 00:06:37.460 --> 00:06:40.460 align:middle line:90% of Native American jewelry. 00:06:40.460 --> 00:06:44.290 align:middle line:84% She paces across the stage and then tells us a story. 00:06:44.290 --> 00:06:46.820 align:middle line:90% 00:06:46.820 --> 00:06:50.390 align:middle line:84% 'The Shuswap region was and is considered 00:06:50.390 --> 00:06:53.600 align:middle line:84% by the Native American people to be a rich place. 00:06:53.600 --> 00:06:58.340 align:middle line:84% Rich in salmon and game, rich in below ground food resources, 00:06:58.340 --> 00:07:00.080 align:middle line:90% such as tubers and roots. 00:07:00.080 --> 00:07:03.170 align:middle line:90% A plentiful land, overall. 00:07:03.170 --> 00:07:07.430 align:middle line:84% In this region, the people would live in permanent village sites 00:07:07.430 --> 00:07:10.940 align:middle line:84% and exploit them for needed resources. 00:07:10.940 --> 00:07:14.360 align:middle line:84% They had elaborate technologies for very effectively using 00:07:14.360 --> 00:07:16.860 align:middle line:84% the resources of the environment. 00:07:16.860 --> 00:07:19.610 align:middle line:84% And they perceived their lives as being 00:07:19.610 --> 00:07:23.150 align:middle line:90% very good and very rich. 00:07:23.150 --> 00:07:27.110 align:middle line:84% Yet, the elders said, at times the world 00:07:27.110 --> 00:07:30.110 align:middle line:84% became too predictable and the challenge 00:07:30.110 --> 00:07:32.180 align:middle line:90% began to go out of life. 00:07:32.180 --> 00:07:36.510 align:middle line:84% Without challenge, life has no meaning. 00:07:36.510 --> 00:07:38.480 align:middle line:84% So the elders in their wisdom, would 00:07:38.480 --> 00:07:41.240 align:middle line:84% decide that the entire village should move. 00:07:41.240 --> 00:07:46.130 align:middle line:84% And these moves would occur every 25 or 30 years. 00:07:46.130 --> 00:07:49.100 align:middle line:84% The entire population would move to a different part of the land 00:07:49.100 --> 00:07:52.010 align:middle line:90% and there they found challenge. 00:07:52.010 --> 00:07:55.490 align:middle line:84% There were new streams to figure out, new game trails to learn, 00:07:55.490 --> 00:07:59.840 align:middle line:84% new areas where the balsam root would be plentiful. 00:07:59.840 --> 00:08:04.160 align:middle line:84% Now life would regain its meaning and be worth living. 00:08:04.160 --> 00:08:08.730 align:middle line:84% Everyone would feel rejuvenated.' 00:08:08.730 --> 00:08:12.930 align:middle line:84% As it turns out, the speaker has done something similar. 00:08:12.930 --> 00:08:15.720 align:middle line:84% For a long time she lived in San Francisco 00:08:15.720 --> 00:08:17.535 align:middle line:84% and now she has moved to Portland." 00:08:17.535 --> 00:08:20.790 align:middle line:90% [AUDIENCE LAUGHS] 00:08:20.790 --> 00:08:25.030 align:middle line:90% 00:08:25.030 --> 00:08:27.030 align:middle line:90% [MORE LAUGHTER] 00:08:27.030 --> 00:08:31.350 align:middle line:84% "Later, a man comes on to do a panel. 00:08:31.350 --> 00:08:37.020 align:middle line:84% 'What are your most useful Anthropocene skills,' he says. 00:08:37.020 --> 00:08:41.850 align:middle line:84% A woman stands up, looking nervous. 00:08:41.850 --> 00:08:44.820 align:middle line:84% She twists her braid in her fingers. 00:08:44.820 --> 00:08:47.520 align:middle line:90% Finally, she begins to speak. 00:08:47.520 --> 00:08:50.910 align:middle line:84% 'I recently learned how to make a long burning candle out 00:08:50.910 --> 00:08:54.180 align:middle line:90% of a can of tuna oil, not water. 00:08:54.180 --> 00:08:56.850 align:middle line:84% I've learned how to recognize a black walnut tree 00:08:56.850 --> 00:09:00.840 align:middle line:84% and that you can survive by eating the inner part 00:09:00.840 --> 00:09:03.340 align:middle line:90% of a birch tree, if need be. 00:09:03.340 --> 00:09:06.930 align:middle line:84% I know it's important to carry chewing gum at all times 00:09:06.930 --> 00:09:08.880 align:middle line:90% for post collapse morale. 00:09:08.880 --> 00:09:12.180 align:middle line:84% And also because it suppresses the appetite. 00:09:12.180 --> 00:09:15.510 align:middle line:84% You can fish with it, but only if it has a bright color 00:09:15.510 --> 00:09:17.100 align:middle line:90% and has sugar in it. 00:09:17.100 --> 00:09:19.980 align:middle line:84% Because only then will a fish investigate and somehow get 00:09:19.980 --> 00:09:22.830 align:middle line:84% hooked at the end of the fishing pole, which 00:09:22.830 --> 00:09:26.640 align:middle line:84% I would have fashioned with a sharpened paperclip 00:09:26.640 --> 00:09:30.030 align:middle line:90% and a string and a stick. 00:09:30.030 --> 00:09:34.860 align:middle line:84% If you need to, you can use wet tobacco over a wound. 00:09:34.860 --> 00:09:39.570 align:middle line:84% Red ants can be eaten, they have a lemony taste. 00:09:39.570 --> 00:09:42.690 align:middle line:84% The Mormons ate lily bulbs, a famine food. 00:09:42.690 --> 00:09:45.030 align:middle line:84% Malcolm X said his mother would make soup out 00:09:45.030 --> 00:09:47.100 align:middle line:84% of dandelions when there wasn't enough to eat. 00:09:47.100 --> 00:09:48.210 align:middle line:90% No one liked it. 00:09:48.210 --> 00:09:51.330 align:middle line:84% If you don't have enough water, don't eat. 00:09:51.330 --> 00:09:52.740 align:middle line:90% Keep your mouth closed. 00:09:52.740 --> 00:09:54.540 align:middle line:90% Conserve your energy. 00:09:54.540 --> 00:09:56.970 align:middle line:84% You can go three hours without shelter, 00:09:56.970 --> 00:10:01.950 align:middle line:84% three days without water, three weeks without food, 00:10:01.950 --> 00:10:05.310 align:middle line:90% three minutes without hope. 00:10:05.310 --> 00:10:07.950 align:middle line:84% Don't drink your own urine, that's a myth. 00:10:07.950 --> 00:10:10.230 align:middle line:84% Don't eat snow, you have to melt it first. 00:10:10.230 --> 00:10:13.440 align:middle line:84% If you have a toothache, you can put crushed aspirin in it. 00:10:13.440 --> 00:10:15.300 align:middle line:84% All you need is to make toothpaste 00:10:15.300 --> 00:10:19.350 align:middle line:84% is baking soda, peppermint oil, and water. 00:10:19.350 --> 00:10:22.050 align:middle line:84% You can chew on a stick until it splinters and then 00:10:22.050 --> 00:10:24.390 align:middle line:90% that's a toothbrush.' 00:10:24.390 --> 00:10:25.600 align:middle line:90% 'Thank you,' he says. 00:10:25.600 --> 00:10:26.100 align:middle line:90% 'Thank you. 00:10:26.100 --> 00:10:27.130 align:middle line:90% Thank you very much. 00:10:27.130 --> 00:10:27.838 align:middle line:90% Please sit down.' 00:10:27.838 --> 00:10:30.450 align:middle line:90% 00:10:30.450 --> 00:10:32.760 align:middle line:84% I can't get to Sylvia afterwards. 00:10:32.760 --> 00:10:35.200 align:middle line:90% There are too many people. 00:10:35.200 --> 00:10:37.830 align:middle line:84% So I walk back to the subway, trying 00:10:37.830 --> 00:10:41.340 align:middle line:84% to remember that my body is provisional. 00:10:41.340 --> 00:10:45.990 align:middle line:84% Blessed is he who makes no sadness in the soul. 00:10:45.990 --> 00:10:48.600 align:middle line:84% I wait for the light at the corner. 00:10:48.600 --> 00:10:52.470 align:middle line:84% A gust of wind blows some papers down the street. 00:10:52.470 --> 00:10:56.200 align:middle line:84% A panic of newspapers, I want to call them. 00:10:56.200 --> 00:10:58.890 align:middle line:84% There's a man sleeping in a doorway 00:10:58.890 --> 00:11:03.540 align:middle line:84% and one comes and curls itself around his feet. 00:11:03.540 --> 00:11:06.630 align:middle line:84% Someone once asked the old monks at Mount Athos what they did 00:11:06.630 --> 00:11:11.190 align:middle line:84% all day and was told, 'We have died and we are in love with 00:11:11.190 --> 00:11:12.240 align:middle line:90% everything.'" 00:11:12.240 --> 00:11:14.030 align:middle line:90% Thank you.