WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:00.990 align:middle line:90% 00:00:00.990 --> 00:00:05.400 align:middle line:84% Many years ago, I had an operation 00:00:05.400 --> 00:00:10.410 align:middle line:84% to correct a congenital heart murmur. 00:00:10.410 --> 00:00:14.760 align:middle line:84% And this involved some very powerful anesthesia 00:00:14.760 --> 00:00:19.740 align:middle line:84% and four hours of surgery to implant 00:00:19.740 --> 00:00:22.310 align:middle line:90% a mechanical aortic valve. 00:00:22.310 --> 00:00:24.060 align:middle line:84% I don't know why I'm telling you all this. 00:00:24.060 --> 00:00:26.490 align:middle line:84% But I do because if I don't tell you this, 00:00:26.490 --> 00:00:29.580 align:middle line:90% you don't understand the poem. 00:00:29.580 --> 00:00:34.530 align:middle line:84% Apart from the indignity of the surgery, 00:00:34.530 --> 00:00:38.760 align:middle line:84% there is this issue where the blood circulates 00:00:38.760 --> 00:00:42.510 align:middle line:84% outside of the body for some considerable time. 00:00:42.510 --> 00:00:44.940 align:middle line:84% And I was talking about this earlier. 00:00:44.940 --> 00:00:50.400 align:middle line:84% This can cause a psychological disassociation, a kind 00:00:50.400 --> 00:00:53.220 align:middle line:90% of emotional derangement. 00:00:53.220 --> 00:01:00.290 align:middle line:84% And this has been given the name Pump Head. 00:01:00.290 --> 00:01:07.270 align:middle line:84% Anyway, this and its twin poem are for Jim. 00:01:07.270 --> 00:01:09.040 align:middle line:90% This is called "The Halving." 00:01:09.040 --> 00:01:16.710 align:middle line:90% 00:01:16.710 --> 00:01:19.260 align:middle line:90% "General anesthesia. 00:01:19.260 --> 00:01:25.350 align:middle line:84% A median sternotomy achieved by sternal saw. 00:01:25.350 --> 00:01:29.760 align:middle line:84% The ribs held aghast by retractor, the tubes 00:01:29.760 --> 00:01:33.780 align:middle line:84% and cannulae drawing the blood to the reservoir 00:01:33.780 --> 00:01:35.730 align:middle line:90% and its bubbler. 00:01:35.730 --> 00:01:38.910 align:middle line:84% The struggling aorta cross clamped. 00:01:38.910 --> 00:01:44.640 align:middle line:84% The heart chilled and stopped and left to dry. 00:01:44.640 --> 00:01:49.260 align:middle line:84% The incompetent bicuspid valve excised. 00:01:49.260 --> 00:01:54.960 align:middle line:84% The new one, a carbon coated disk housed expensively 00:01:54.960 --> 00:01:59.280 align:middle line:84% in a cage of tantalum, is broken from its sterile 00:01:59.280 --> 00:02:04.170 align:middle line:84% pouch then heavily implanted into the native heart. 00:02:04.170 --> 00:02:08.800 align:middle line:90% Bolstered, seated with sutures. 00:02:08.800 --> 00:02:12.840 align:middle line:84% The aorta freed, the heart restarted. 00:02:12.840 --> 00:02:16.380 align:middle line:84% The blood allowed back after its time abroad, 00:02:16.380 --> 00:02:19.170 align:middle line:90% circulating in the machine. 00:02:19.170 --> 00:02:23.760 align:middle line:84% The rib spreader relaxed and the plumbing removed. 00:02:23.760 --> 00:02:27.510 align:middle line:84% The breastbone lashed with sternal wires. 00:02:27.510 --> 00:02:28.990 align:middle line:90% The incision closed. 00:02:28.990 --> 00:02:33.010 align:middle line:90% 00:02:33.010 --> 00:02:38.620 align:middle line:84% For hours I'd been away, out of my body made to die, 00:02:38.620 --> 00:02:42.160 align:middle line:90% then jerked back to the world. 00:02:42.160 --> 00:02:45.190 align:middle line:84% The distractions of delirium came and went 00:02:45.190 --> 00:02:47.620 align:middle line:84% and then as the morphine drained, 00:02:47.620 --> 00:02:52.030 align:middle line:84% I was left with a split chest that ground and grated on 00:02:52.030 --> 00:02:54.010 align:middle line:90% itself. 00:02:54.010 --> 00:02:58.120 align:middle line:84% Over the pain, the blackness rose and swelled. 00:02:58.120 --> 00:03:01.000 align:middle line:90% Pump Head, is what some call it. 00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:06.370 align:middle line:84% Debris from the bypass machine migrating to the brain. 00:03:06.370 --> 00:03:11.050 align:middle line:84% But it felt more interesting than that. 00:03:11.050 --> 00:03:17.810 align:middle line:84% Halved and unhelmed, I have been away, I said to the ceiling. 00:03:17.810 --> 00:03:21.180 align:middle line:90% And now I am not myself." 00:03:21.180 --> 00:03:22.000 align:middle line:90%