WEBVTT

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"The spring."

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He told her what
he was going to do.

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"What else is new?"

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she said.

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She finished putting the
winter jumper on the baby,

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she kissed and hugged her.

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He stood there like you stood
at the corner of the world.

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"I told you," she said, "what
you do is your business.

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You don't have any here."

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He held out his trembling
hand to the baby.

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The baby looked at it like she
might look at cold chicken.

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"Baby," he said, weakly.

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"Mm," the baby said, and
she hugged her mother.

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There wasn't much
on the other end,

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other side of his life
except the usual wreckage.

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"Go on," he said again.

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"She's probably there.

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She'll tell you."

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"I know what she'll say.

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The usual shit.

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Go to hell," she said.

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"Right now go hell,"
the baby said.

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[LAUGHTER]

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There wasn't anything
to say anymore.

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Might as well talk
to the fucking sky.

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He tried one more time, though.

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"What are you going to do?"

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he said.

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She didn't hesitate.

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"I'll call the fucking cops
if you don't leave right now,"

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she said.

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"Right now," the baby said.

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His head spun right down
from the larger circle.

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The spiral became small,
then smaller and tight

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like a spring.

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"Please don't do that," he said.

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His voice quavered.

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"Please just listen."

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He felt like the coiled
spring was in his hand.

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It made his whole arm tremble.

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The baby was now fully
dressed, and mother and child

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moved toward the door.

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"Please leave," he
heard his ex-wife say.

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"You must try," the
counselor had said.

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"Forgive yourself."

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He had tried.

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And he had tried.

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And he had failed every task.

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"Keep a journal," the
counselor had said.

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"Do your fourth step.

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Talk to your sponsor.

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Keep talking.

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Go to meetings.

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Make amends."

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He had tried, and
then he had not tried.

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Keep failing, keep
failing, and finally, you

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will have what you do not.

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Finally, you have
what you do not have.

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The end of the
world will be yours.

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When the police came he
stood outside the door,

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the spring loaded and ready.

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