WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.693 align:middle line:84% I guess here's transformation number two. 00:00:02.693 --> 00:00:04.860 align:middle line:84% It's so odd to be reading in front of so many people 00:00:04.860 --> 00:00:09.540 align:middle line:90% who made this book. 00:00:09.540 --> 00:00:12.810 align:middle line:90% Hello, thank you. 00:00:12.810 --> 00:00:15.030 align:middle line:90% It's cool. 00:00:15.030 --> 00:00:17.140 align:middle line:84% This is from the last essay in the book. 00:00:17.140 --> 00:00:20.298 align:middle line:84% It's called "Coda, Codex" and I'm just 00:00:20.298 --> 00:00:22.590 align:middle line:84% reading it because it took place in Tucson with summer. 00:00:22.590 --> 00:00:28.430 align:middle line:90% 00:00:28.430 --> 00:00:32.060 align:middle line:84% On our better days, we and the tree seem alike. 00:00:32.060 --> 00:00:35.060 align:middle line:84% Apollo chases Daphne and Daphne turns to laurel. 00:00:35.060 --> 00:00:37.190 align:middle line:84% Hades abducts Leuce and there she 00:00:37.190 --> 00:00:40.790 align:middle line:84% pops up again, a Populus alba in the Elysian fields. 00:00:40.790 --> 00:00:43.700 align:middle line:84% Zeus gives his temple tenders, Baucis and Philemon, 00:00:43.700 --> 00:00:47.060 align:middle line:84% the gift of dying concurrently, and they shake green leaves 00:00:47.060 --> 00:00:50.060 align:middle line:84% and mossy lips until husband and wife become a linden 00:00:50.060 --> 00:00:52.340 align:middle line:84% and oak that stand so close together, 00:00:52.340 --> 00:00:55.820 align:middle line:84% their branches twist from a single trunk. 00:00:55.820 --> 00:00:58.160 align:middle line:84% This is not just tree transformation, 00:00:58.160 --> 00:01:00.050 align:middle line:90% but tree storage. 00:01:00.050 --> 00:01:02.120 align:middle line:84% In Arthurian legend, the Lady of the Lake 00:01:02.120 --> 00:01:05.239 align:middle line:84% entombs poor besotted Merlin in a tree trunk. 00:01:05.239 --> 00:01:08.570 align:middle line:84% In Scandinavia, the oak is said to belong to the dead, 00:01:08.570 --> 00:01:11.060 align:middle line:84% not just because it was material for coffins, 00:01:11.060 --> 00:01:14.060 align:middle line:84% but because it was a coffin itself. 00:01:14.060 --> 00:01:16.310 align:middle line:84% Norsemen would search the woods until they crossed 00:01:16.310 --> 00:01:18.200 align:middle line:84% a suitable find, and there they'd 00:01:18.200 --> 00:01:23.330 align:middle line:84% bury their loved ones in the slingshot split of its trunk. 00:01:23.330 --> 00:01:25.430 align:middle line:84% The Norse also said the gods whittled Eubla, 00:01:25.430 --> 00:01:27.260 align:middle line:90% the first woman, from oak. 00:01:27.260 --> 00:01:30.470 align:middle line:84% Virgil claimed oaks gave birth to the first men. 00:01:30.470 --> 00:01:33.020 align:middle line:84% When my mother likes to reference the Welsh in her, 00:01:33.020 --> 00:01:36.350 align:middle line:84% she will say 'I'm of druid stock.' 00:01:36.350 --> 00:01:39.890 align:middle line:84% She's joking about that moony streak, the Merlin in her, 00:01:39.890 --> 00:01:42.200 align:middle line:84% but what she's really saying, the word druid, 00:01:42.200 --> 00:01:44.030 align:middle line:84% stemming from the Celtic for oak, 00:01:44.030 --> 00:01:46.550 align:middle line:90% is that she's made of wood. 00:01:46.550 --> 00:01:49.190 align:middle line:84% So I have a proposal, if you're looking for ways 00:01:49.190 --> 00:01:51.410 align:middle line:84% to stick around, there are worse fates 00:01:51.410 --> 00:01:54.890 align:middle line:90% than coming back as a tree. 00:01:54.890 --> 00:01:57.260 align:middle line:84% A few summers ago I worked as a wood splitter 00:01:57.260 --> 00:02:00.290 align:middle line:90% for a man named Angelo Romeo. 00:02:00.290 --> 00:02:02.900 align:middle line:84% This was in Tucson, 100 degrees, and I'd 00:02:02.900 --> 00:02:05.780 align:middle line:84% show up to Angelo's backyard at 6:30 or so, 00:02:05.780 --> 00:02:08.000 align:middle line:90% and I worked till noon. 00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:09.860 align:middle line:84% When the heat became too much to bear, 00:02:09.860 --> 00:02:13.460 align:middle line:84% I biked my way back over the pavement built by the WPA 00:02:13.460 --> 00:02:16.790 align:middle line:84% until I reached the closest air conditioned space with energy 00:02:16.790 --> 00:02:19.640 align:middle line:90% drinks and a Panda Express. 00:02:19.640 --> 00:02:21.620 align:middle line:90% My job was simple. 00:02:21.620 --> 00:02:24.320 align:middle line:84% I would break down the rounds of wood Angelo collected 00:02:24.320 --> 00:02:26.840 align:middle line:84% from his tree service details around Tucson, 00:02:26.840 --> 00:02:30.290 align:middle line:84% and I would stack them against a corrugated shed. 00:02:30.290 --> 00:02:32.750 align:middle line:84% We were essentially recycling, turning 00:02:32.750 --> 00:02:35.540 align:middle line:84% what was going to the dump into ethically sourced, 00:02:35.540 --> 00:02:39.680 align:middle line:84% locally harvested firewood to be bundled and sold at marked up 00:02:39.680 --> 00:02:41.870 align:middle line:90% prices to Whole Foods. 00:02:41.870 --> 00:02:46.160 align:middle line:84% I used a machine splitter and I built a wall of wood. 00:02:46.160 --> 00:02:52.220 align:middle line:84% Mesquite, pine, pepper, chinaberry, and birch. 00:02:52.220 --> 00:02:54.740 align:middle line:84% Angelo's backyard was a cluttered place. 00:02:54.740 --> 00:02:56.600 align:middle line:84% A wood chipper hitched to a truck, 00:02:56.600 --> 00:02:59.660 align:middle line:84% a flatbed for hauling rounds, two splitters, 00:02:59.660 --> 00:03:02.120 align:middle line:90% a tarped-over workstation. 00:03:02.120 --> 00:03:05.810 align:middle line:84% Arborist tools hung homicidally from the shed's walls. 00:03:05.810 --> 00:03:09.140 align:middle line:84% There were pole saws and chainsaws, loppers, 00:03:09.140 --> 00:03:11.930 align:middle line:90% alarmingly large pruning shears. 00:03:11.930 --> 00:03:15.050 align:middle line:84% Red Baron pizza and flank steak in the freezer, 00:03:15.050 --> 00:03:18.230 align:middle line:84% ASHA regulations stapled to the wall. 00:03:18.230 --> 00:03:21.950 align:middle line:84% And throughout the yard there were piles and piles of wood. 00:03:21.950 --> 00:03:25.640 align:middle line:84% Wood strewn everywhere, wood that I, Sisyphus, 00:03:25.640 --> 00:03:30.020 align:middle line:84% would eventually split into smaller and smaller pieces. 00:03:30.020 --> 00:03:35.270 align:middle line:84% In one corner, Angelo even kept the pile for the funny shapes. 00:03:35.270 --> 00:03:37.070 align:middle line:84% The knots and gnarls and the human 00:03:37.070 --> 00:03:39.230 align:middle line:90% faces in the warp of the trunk. 00:03:39.230 --> 00:03:43.130 align:middle line:84% The totem carved out of a round of mesquite, its face placid 00:03:43.130 --> 00:03:45.920 align:middle line:84% and content, as it watched over me and my wall, 00:03:45.920 --> 00:03:49.290 align:middle line:90% protecting us from harm. 00:03:49.290 --> 00:03:52.920 align:middle line:84% When he didn't work trees, Angelo was a firefighter. 00:03:52.920 --> 00:03:56.190 align:middle line:84% His looks matched his soap opera name. 00:03:56.190 --> 00:04:00.480 align:middle line:84% He was tan, had dark hair, eyes like lakes, two indentations 00:04:00.480 --> 00:04:02.940 align:middle line:84% sat on either temple, like dimples, 00:04:02.940 --> 00:04:05.040 align:middle line:84% as if a very small, and very round 00:04:05.040 --> 00:04:07.840 align:middle line:90% hammer had pocked them there. 00:04:07.840 --> 00:04:10.990 align:middle line:84% As far as bosses go, Angelo was a good one. 00:04:10.990 --> 00:04:13.060 align:middle line:84% He set up a fan to blow the exhaust 00:04:13.060 --> 00:04:14.500 align:middle line:90% away from where I worked. 00:04:14.500 --> 00:04:17.500 align:middle line:84% He climbed a ladder and he stretched a blue tarp out back 00:04:17.500 --> 00:04:20.170 align:middle line:84% of the shed, where I would take unscheduled breaks 00:04:20.170 --> 00:04:22.810 align:middle line:90% to eat Larabars in the shade. 00:04:22.810 --> 00:04:25.810 align:middle line:84% When I threw out my back because I lifted rounds the wrong way, 00:04:25.810 --> 00:04:29.980 align:middle line:84% he left me a brace and a blanket on which to rest my knees. 00:04:29.980 --> 00:04:33.820 align:middle line:84% He shooed away the tabby that liked to saddle up and scratch. 00:04:33.820 --> 00:04:37.720 align:middle line:84% When he saw me sweeping up palm fronds he said, quite kindly, 00:04:37.720 --> 00:04:41.920 align:middle line:84% 'well you see Thomas, the trick is not to sweep like a pussy.' 00:04:41.920 --> 00:04:44.830 align:middle line:84% I made $10 an hour and the mini fridge plastered 00:04:44.830 --> 00:04:47.480 align:middle line:84% with custom magnets reading Romeo Tree Service 00:04:47.480 --> 00:04:51.550 align:middle line:84% Baby was always well stocked with Powerade. 00:04:51.550 --> 00:04:54.520 align:middle line:84% To help pass the time, I thought of my wall of wood 00:04:54.520 --> 00:04:57.190 align:middle line:84% as like the wall of the Grand Canyon. 00:04:57.190 --> 00:04:59.110 align:middle line:84% The different varieties of trees formed 00:04:59.110 --> 00:05:01.450 align:middle line:84% a vast and magnificent patchwork, 00:05:01.450 --> 00:05:03.370 align:middle line:84% all layered on top of one another 00:05:03.370 --> 00:05:06.130 align:middle line:84% like the strata of rocks inside the Canyon rim. 00:05:06.130 --> 00:05:08.650 align:middle line:84% The pre-Anthropocene layers you'd gaze 00:05:08.650 --> 00:05:13.090 align:middle line:84% at after slotting a quarter into parking meter binoculars. 00:05:13.090 --> 00:05:15.430 align:middle line:84% The downside was that I became so carried away 00:05:15.430 --> 00:05:17.830 align:middle line:84% with seeing my wall as something else, 00:05:17.830 --> 00:05:20.800 align:middle line:84% that I failed to create a stable structure. 00:05:20.800 --> 00:05:23.500 align:middle line:84% It sagged and it split apart, under siege 00:05:23.500 --> 00:05:24.910 align:middle line:90% from its own weight. 00:05:24.910 --> 00:05:27.490 align:middle line:84% I quickly learned the structural limitations 00:05:27.490 --> 00:05:31.470 align:middle line:84% of a trapezoid as opposed to a rectangle. 00:05:31.470 --> 00:05:34.620 align:middle line:84% I had stacked so high and so dangerously, 00:05:34.620 --> 00:05:36.810 align:middle line:84% that Angelo forbade his wife and daughter 00:05:36.810 --> 00:05:38.850 align:middle line:90% from walking underneath. 00:05:38.850 --> 00:05:41.100 align:middle line:84% He made me lug the splitter back another foot 00:05:41.100 --> 00:05:44.640 align:middle line:84% so that if the wall did fall, it would not fall on me. 00:05:44.640 --> 00:05:48.090 align:middle line:84% Even the cat didn't saunter back there. 00:05:48.090 --> 00:05:50.340 align:middle line:84% My job, if you were being generous, 00:05:50.340 --> 00:05:52.440 align:middle line:90% was a kind of architecture. 00:05:52.440 --> 00:05:54.780 align:middle line:84% Here I was, to break up the discarded 00:05:54.780 --> 00:05:59.660 align:middle line:84% and find a new and useful arrangement. 00:05:59.660 --> 00:06:02.720 align:middle line:84% As it turned out, my wall never did fall. 00:06:02.720 --> 00:06:05.480 align:middle line:84% The most dangerous part of my job was the wood splitter, 00:06:05.480 --> 00:06:08.330 align:middle line:84% a machine made up a small diesel engine. 00:06:08.330 --> 00:06:10.910 align:middle line:84% A cylindrical piston to latch onto the wood, 00:06:10.910 --> 00:06:13.100 align:middle line:90% and a sharp wedged blade. 00:06:13.100 --> 00:06:15.650 align:middle line:84% The closest comparison I can come up with 00:06:15.650 --> 00:06:17.690 align:middle line:84% is a medieval torture device given 00:06:17.690 --> 00:06:21.047 align:middle line:90% the horsepower of a lawnmower. 00:06:21.047 --> 00:06:22.630 align:middle line:84% The job came without health insurance, 00:06:22.630 --> 00:06:25.180 align:middle line:84% and so Angelo would lecture me very carefully 00:06:25.180 --> 00:06:27.730 align:middle line:84% on the importance of positioning my hands with regards 00:06:27.730 --> 00:06:29.650 align:middle line:90% to the splitter. 00:06:29.650 --> 00:06:32.680 align:middle line:84% I was to keep them on top of the log at all times, 00:06:32.680 --> 00:06:35.320 align:middle line:90% and never on its sides. 00:06:35.320 --> 00:06:38.680 align:middle line:84% If I put my hands directly in line with the splitters blade, 00:06:38.680 --> 00:06:41.950 align:middle line:84% or cylinder, an errant glove thread might snag, 00:06:41.950 --> 00:06:44.560 align:middle line:84% or my hand might slip and mangle. 00:06:44.560 --> 00:06:49.450 align:middle line:84% A tree never fully heals, and so its rings never fully forget. 00:06:49.450 --> 00:06:51.650 align:middle line:84% They grow around their wounds and scars, 00:06:51.650 --> 00:06:54.790 align:middle line:84% incorporating them into their past as imperfections 00:06:54.790 --> 00:06:56.440 align:middle line:90% and blemishes. 00:06:56.440 --> 00:06:58.060 align:middle line:84% One never knows when one of these 00:06:58.060 --> 00:07:02.410 align:middle line:84% would catch and cause a hand to fall in line with the blade. 00:07:02.410 --> 00:07:05.020 align:middle line:84% One must be respectful, Angelo motioned 00:07:05.020 --> 00:07:07.300 align:middle line:84% toward the log, of the things that 00:07:07.300 --> 00:07:11.310 align:middle line:90% were more powerful than us. 00:07:11.310 --> 00:07:14.670 align:middle line:84% When Angelo took to the splitter, he moved quickly. 00:07:14.670 --> 00:07:17.310 align:middle line:84% He'd bend down toward a log twice the thickness 00:07:17.310 --> 00:07:18.180 align:middle line:90% of his thigh. 00:07:18.180 --> 00:07:22.410 align:middle line:84% He would embrace it, then he'd heave against it for momentum. 00:07:22.410 --> 00:07:24.780 align:middle line:84% Once the log rolled onto the bar, 00:07:24.780 --> 00:07:26.850 align:middle line:84% he held its weight against his leg 00:07:26.850 --> 00:07:28.890 align:middle line:90% and then he yanked the lever. 00:07:28.890 --> 00:07:30.780 align:middle line:84% He split the wood down the middle 00:07:30.780 --> 00:07:33.660 align:middle line:84% and let one half fall to the ground. 00:07:33.660 --> 00:07:37.110 align:middle line:84% In short, expert strokes, he pushed the other half back 00:07:37.110 --> 00:07:39.030 align:middle line:84% and then he'd yanked the lever again, 00:07:39.030 --> 00:07:44.730 align:middle line:84% rotating the trunk to shave off individual pieces of firewood. 00:07:44.730 --> 00:07:47.010 align:middle line:84% When the blade split the stump in two, 00:07:47.010 --> 00:07:50.430 align:middle line:84% the wood would make any number of sounds. 00:07:50.430 --> 00:07:53.280 align:middle line:84% Each log had its own personality, 00:07:53.280 --> 00:07:56.910 align:middle line:84% depending on its density, its dryness, its age. 00:07:56.910 --> 00:08:00.630 align:middle line:84% Eucalyptus crumbled, mesquite quartered into symmetrical 00:08:00.630 --> 00:08:05.800 align:middle line:84% chunks, dry pine popped, wet pine pasted. 00:08:05.800 --> 00:08:07.960 align:middle line:84% Some pieces split silently, and some 00:08:07.960 --> 00:08:10.000 align:middle line:90% cracked like a pistol shot. 00:08:10.000 --> 00:08:13.600 align:middle line:84% Some hissed, some wheezed, some shattered. 00:08:13.600 --> 00:08:16.090 align:middle line:84% Sometimes I'd find termite larvae burrowed 00:08:16.090 --> 00:08:18.520 align:middle line:84% into the pockets of wood, columbaria 00:08:18.520 --> 00:08:21.250 align:middle line:84% stacked throughout the striations and rings. 00:08:21.250 --> 00:08:23.950 align:middle line:84% And I'd gather the squishy little things in my glove 00:08:23.950 --> 00:08:25.720 align:middle line:84% and I'd toss them over my shoulder, 00:08:25.720 --> 00:08:28.630 align:middle line:84% like rice at a wedding, to clear the wall 00:08:28.630 --> 00:08:30.910 align:middle line:84% and land a treat for the starlings 00:08:30.910 --> 00:08:34.360 align:middle line:90% in the alleyway behind me. 00:08:34.360 --> 00:08:37.179 align:middle line:84% Then there were the rule breakers, the anomalies. 00:08:37.179 --> 00:08:40.419 align:middle line:84% The logs that for whatever reason, a hidden knot, 00:08:40.419 --> 00:08:45.190 align:middle line:84% an unseen tumorous growth, they'd snap back at my face, 00:08:45.190 --> 00:08:48.910 align:middle line:84% as if acting out some old grudge between us. 00:08:48.910 --> 00:08:52.120 align:middle line:84% At times, stripping around off the blade 00:08:52.120 --> 00:08:54.910 align:middle line:84% was like flaying open veins and arteries. 00:08:54.910 --> 00:08:56.770 align:middle line:84% The edges of a quartered mesquite, 00:08:56.770 --> 00:09:00.550 align:middle line:84% just like the marbled fat of flesh. 00:09:00.550 --> 00:09:03.550 align:middle line:84% Other times, a log would groan, something ancient 00:09:03.550 --> 00:09:07.540 align:middle line:84% and primordial, something battered and hurt. 00:09:07.540 --> 00:09:09.430 align:middle line:84% I don't know much about the last sounds 00:09:09.430 --> 00:09:12.730 align:middle line:84% people make before they die, but I can tell you, 00:09:12.730 --> 00:09:14.530 align:middle line:84% the sound of that wood being split 00:09:14.530 --> 00:09:17.630 align:middle line:90% was a distinctly human sound. 00:09:17.630 --> 00:09:21.500 align:middle line:84% I would look at the log after, the fan whirring, the starlings 00:09:21.500 --> 00:09:23.870 align:middle line:84% chirping on their wire, and it seemed 00:09:23.870 --> 00:09:26.810 align:middle line:90% like I was making a sacrifice. 00:09:26.810 --> 00:09:28.610 align:middle line:84% It was the sound you'd make if you weren't 00:09:28.610 --> 00:09:30.860 align:middle line:90% fully aware of being human. 00:09:30.860 --> 00:09:34.370 align:middle line:84% If you had turned over in your sleep, and in your half state, 00:09:34.370 --> 00:09:37.680 align:middle line:84% groaned about your very bad back. 00:09:37.680 --> 00:09:40.950 align:middle line:84% For a brief instant, Angelo yanking the lever, 00:09:40.950 --> 00:09:44.640 align:middle line:84% me hugging the next round for dear life, the wall growing 00:09:44.640 --> 00:09:48.810 align:middle line:84% ever higher, the sound wasn't the wood being split, 00:09:48.810 --> 00:09:51.470 align:middle line:90% but the voices themselves. 00:09:51.470 --> 00:09:52.450 align:middle line:90% That's where I'll stop. 00:09:52.450 --> 00:09:54.380 align:middle line:90% Thank you so much.