WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:00.535 align:middle line:90% 00:00:00.535 --> 00:00:02.160 align:middle line:84% All right, all right, got to figure out 00:00:02.160 --> 00:00:02.850 align:middle line:90% how to work this thing. 00:00:02.850 --> 00:00:03.600 align:middle line:90% OK, so cool. 00:00:03.600 --> 00:00:07.050 align:middle line:84% So now we are actually getting to the present moment. 00:00:07.050 --> 00:00:12.750 align:middle line:84% And I thought I would just read two poems from "How 00:00:12.750 --> 00:00:13.620 align:middle line:90% to Be Drawn." 00:00:13.620 --> 00:00:16.050 align:middle line:84% And a lot of stuff is going on in the book. 00:00:16.050 --> 00:00:19.660 align:middle line:84% But one of the things that only gets framed now, 00:00:19.660 --> 00:00:23.190 align:middle line:84% recontextualize based on tonight's occasion, 00:00:23.190 --> 00:00:25.680 align:middle line:84% is thinking like trying to braid those two 00:00:25.680 --> 00:00:29.970 align:middle line:84% things inside and outside, to bear witness to it, 00:00:29.970 --> 00:00:35.710 align:middle line:84% to enact it, to be a victim of it, of spectacle of violence. 00:00:35.710 --> 00:00:37.980 align:middle line:84% So I think, in some ways, I just picked two poems 00:00:37.980 --> 00:00:43.650 align:middle line:84% that I thought were trying to do that on this book, 00:00:43.650 --> 00:00:46.385 align:middle line:84% and then to see what that means for the next, like, 00:00:46.385 --> 00:00:47.760 align:middle line:84% what comes after that is what I'm 00:00:47.760 --> 00:00:50.520 align:middle line:84% thinking about in this last poem that I'll share with you. 00:00:50.520 --> 00:00:54.010 align:middle line:84% But here are two from "How to Be Drawn." 00:00:54.010 --> 00:00:55.770 align:middle line:90% So this one is "The Deer." 00:00:55.770 --> 00:00:59.190 align:middle line:84% I guess, there's not much to say about it. 00:00:59.190 --> 00:01:03.840 align:middle line:84% Muscadine is a little berry that grows in the Southeast. 00:01:03.840 --> 00:01:05.509 align:middle line:90% And it is like-- 00:01:05.509 --> 00:01:07.950 align:middle line:84% the joke that I tell is that they would sell them 00:01:07.950 --> 00:01:12.630 align:middle line:84% in Whole Foods like in Tucson, and you would buy them. 00:01:12.630 --> 00:01:15.922 align:middle line:84% But in South Carolina, they're just wild little berries. 00:01:15.922 --> 00:01:17.130 align:middle line:90% But my mother would get them. 00:01:17.130 --> 00:01:18.990 align:middle line:84% And it's like this muscadine wine, 00:01:18.990 --> 00:01:20.880 align:middle line:84% if you know anything about that area. 00:01:20.880 --> 00:01:23.550 align:middle line:84% So I guess that's all you need to know. 00:01:23.550 --> 00:01:26.430 align:middle line:90% And Pataskala is a town in Ohio. 00:01:26.430 --> 00:01:26.940 align:middle line:90% "The Deer." 00:01:26.940 --> 00:01:29.970 align:middle line:90% 00:01:29.970 --> 00:01:33.210 align:middle line:84% Outside Pataskala, I saw the deer 00:01:33.210 --> 00:01:37.860 align:middle line:84% with the soft white belly, the deer with two eyes as blind 00:01:37.860 --> 00:01:38.880 align:middle line:90% as holes. 00:01:38.880 --> 00:01:43.320 align:middle line:84% I saw it leap from a bush beside the highway as if a moment 00:01:43.320 --> 00:01:47.520 align:middle line:84% before it leapt it had been a bush beside the highway. 00:01:47.520 --> 00:01:52.710 align:middle line:84% And I saw how if I wished it, I could be the deer, a creature 00:01:52.710 --> 00:01:55.350 align:middle line:90% bony as a branch in spring. 00:01:55.350 --> 00:01:58.290 align:middle line:84% And when I closed my eyes, I found the scent 00:01:58.290 --> 00:02:02.310 align:middle line:84% of muscadine, the berry my mother plucked Sundays 00:02:02.310 --> 00:02:05.160 align:middle line:84% from the roadside where fumes toughened 00:02:05.160 --> 00:02:09.330 align:middle line:84% its speckled skin and seeds slept suspended in a mucus 00:02:09.330 --> 00:02:12.570 align:middle line:90% thick as the sleep of an embryo. 00:02:12.570 --> 00:02:15.330 align:middle line:84% It is the ugliest berry along the road. 00:02:15.330 --> 00:02:18.600 align:middle line:84% But chewed, it reminded me of speed. 00:02:18.600 --> 00:02:22.230 align:middle line:84% And I saw, when I was the deer, that I 00:02:22.230 --> 00:02:24.030 align:middle line:90% didn't have to be a deer. 00:02:24.030 --> 00:02:28.020 align:middle line:84% I could become a machine with the woman inside it, 00:02:28.020 --> 00:02:32.550 align:middle line:84% moving at a speed that leaves a stain on the breeze 00:02:32.550 --> 00:02:35.880 align:middle line:84% and on the muscadine's flesh, which is almost meat, 00:02:35.880 --> 00:02:38.070 align:middle line:84% the sweet pulp of muscadine leaves 00:02:38.070 --> 00:02:40.710 align:middle line:84% when it's crushed in the teeth of a deer, 00:02:40.710 --> 00:02:44.130 align:middle line:84% or a mother for that matter, or her child waiting 00:02:44.130 --> 00:02:49.530 align:middle line:84% with something like shame to be fed a berry uglier than shame. 00:02:49.530 --> 00:02:51.480 align:middle line:84% Though, it is not like this for the deer. 00:02:51.480 --> 00:02:52.500 align:middle line:90% It is not shame. 00:02:52.500 --> 00:02:54.690 align:middle line:90% Because the deer is not human. 00:02:54.690 --> 00:02:59.250 align:middle line:84% It is only almost human when it looks on the road and leaps 00:02:59.250 --> 00:03:04.530 align:middle line:84% at least 30 feet, covering in a blink the deer I cannot be, 00:03:04.530 --> 00:03:09.450 align:middle line:84% the dumb deer, dumb and foolish enough to ignore anything that 00:03:09.450 --> 00:03:13.740 align:middle line:84% runs but is not alive, a trafficking machine filled with 00:03:13.740 --> 00:03:18.060 align:middle line:84% a distracted mind and body deadly and durable enough 00:03:18.060 --> 00:03:21.330 align:middle line:84% to deconstruct a deer when it leaps, I'm telling you, 00:03:21.330 --> 00:03:24.690 align:middle line:90% like someone being chased. 00:03:24.690 --> 00:03:28.415 align:middle line:84% I remember, a friend told me how when he was eight or nine, 00:03:28.415 --> 00:03:31.940 align:middle line:84% a half naked woman ran to the car window 00:03:31.940 --> 00:03:35.720 align:middle line:84% crying her man was after her with a knife. 00:03:35.720 --> 00:03:39.890 align:middle line:84% But his mother locked the doors and sped away. 00:03:39.890 --> 00:03:43.250 align:middle line:84% Someone tell him his mother was not a coward. 00:03:43.250 --> 00:03:45.020 align:middle line:90% That's what he thinks. 00:03:45.020 --> 00:03:47.840 align:middle line:84% Tell him it was because he and his little brother 00:03:47.840 --> 00:03:49.820 align:middle line:84% were in the car that she would not 00:03:49.820 --> 00:03:52.490 align:middle line:90% let the troubled world inside. 00:03:52.490 --> 00:03:57.770 align:middle line:84% It was no one's fault. The mind separated from the body. 00:03:57.770 --> 00:04:00.680 align:middle line:84% I could almost see the holes of her eyes, 00:04:00.680 --> 00:04:03.500 align:middle line:84% the white fuzz on her tongue, the raised 00:04:03.500 --> 00:04:07.910 align:middle line:84% buds soft as a bed of pink seeds, the hole of a mouth 00:04:07.910 --> 00:04:12.350 align:middle line:84% stretched wide enough to hold a whole baby inside. 00:04:12.350 --> 00:04:16.010 align:middle line:84% I could almost see its eyes at the back of her throat. 00:04:16.010 --> 00:04:19.300 align:middle line:84% I could definitely hear its cries. 00:04:19.300 --> 00:04:20.064 align:middle line:90%