WEBVTT

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But it's called-- it's
also from Belfast.

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It's called Kentucky Derby Day--

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Kentucky Derby Day,
Belfast, Maine.

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Kentucky Derby Day,
Belfast, Maine.

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When I was 12, I happened
to guess the winning

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horse of the Kentucky Derby.

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I was on the sixth grade field
trip to the Henry Ford Museum,

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where we learned the
plain common sense is

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the key to the moral dominance
of the United States.

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The man in the car radio
discussed the horses.

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And when he came to the
name Dark Star, I said,

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that's the horse for me.

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I mean, it seemed
clear that any horse

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named Dark Star had to win.

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The boy nods.

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He may be no Apollo,
but he knows about love.

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But this is Derby
day, 21 eager horses.

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And I'm told Tap
Shoes is the horse

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to beat, so I call
over the bartender

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and say, hey, turn on the TV
and let's watch the Derby.

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He says, what's the Derby?

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And I say, the Kentucky Derby.

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And he says, I
never heard of it.

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But he's a nice kid,
so he flicks on the TV.

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And there's Churchill
Downs and thousands

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of flowers and happy fans.

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Jesus, says the kid.

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Look at all those people.

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It's the Derby, I say.

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See, there's Muhammad Ali.

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Who's that?

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Says the kid.

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You know, I say.

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You know, I say,
the great boxer.

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Hey, says the kid.

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Those horses are going
to pull little carts?

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Not today, I say.

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Too bad, says the kid.

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I like the carts.

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On the TV, the
announcer is predicting

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how the race will be
run, and famous people

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are asked their opinions.

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I wait for a twinkle in my
brain, but nothing happens.

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Still, it's all so exciting.

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I want to talk to somebody
about it, say how making a bet

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is like falling in love or that
the horses and jockeys look

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like centaurs before
the rape of whoever.

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But the bartender is
learning to make a Pink

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Lady while the five
chicken processors are

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deep in their sadness.

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The girl with a collar puts
her hand on the boy's shoulder

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and says, he needs me, Joey.

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I don't care if he hits me.

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He wouldn't hit me if
he didn't need to do it.

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And Leo says, listen.

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I'm no good she thinks
I'm good, but I'm a pig.

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The light from the door
throws their shadows

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on the wall I think how defeated
their lives are and wonder

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why the girl wears a dog
collar and what Leo must

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do to mistreat her, if the old
man will really die of cancer,

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and why the boy sticks
holes in his arm

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to make dumb tattoos with the
name Jesse and little stars

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and crosses, how he will die
with that sentimental doodling

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still on his body, having
spent his life as a poor man's

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advertisement for
unrequited love.

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In no time I start
thinking of my own life

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with its insoluble problems, how
I can't afford health insurance

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and my parents constantly
fret that my marriage

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is falling apart.

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But on the TV, they're
getting ready for the run

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for the roses, 140,000
happy fans maybe Bold Ego,

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I tell myself, maybe Cure the
Blues, or Proud Appeal, maybe

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Tough Avenger or Mythical Ruler.

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What noble names.

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They all deserve to win.

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The bartender looks up
from his little red guide.

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I like gray horses
best, he says.

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It makes them look sad.

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Now they're in the gate.

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The TVs by the jukebox,
and the flashing lights

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become all the flowers
at Churchill Downs.

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Then the bell and they're off.

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Right away, the
horses string out,

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rounding the first turn as the
favorites take an early lead.

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But uh-oh, here comes the
girl with the dog collar

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with about five bucks
for the jukebox.

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Hold up, I tell her.

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This is the big race,
and it's almost over.

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She's indifferent but
polite, so she waits.

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What's your horse?

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She asks.

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Maybe Bold Ego, I say,
unable to see him.

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I love those country
songs, says the girl.

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She stands beside me,
and when I look down,

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I find that I can look
down on her blouse.

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But on the TV, terrible
things are happening.

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All the heroic names
are falling behind,

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and coming up fast to the
finish is Pleasant Colony,

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while the number two horse,
Would Chopper, pays over $20.

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And I'll bet they never
announced his name,

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because I spent half the
damn winter chopping wood.

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And if I'd put $1,000 on wood
chopper, or even $100, then

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right now I'd be winging my
way south to better times.

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Troy has fallen,
I tell the girl.

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Play those country songs.

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She puts a hand on my arm.

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It's a crazy world, she says.

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And I say, what's a
smart girl like you

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doing here in Barbara's Lunch?

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Why, she says-- why, she says,
we're just waiting for Big John

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to get us out of here.

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Aren't we all?

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I say.

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The girl feeds her five
bucks into the slot

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and goes back to Leo, drapes
herself over his shoulders.

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The jukebox begins to pound
out "Take these chains

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from my heart," which drowns
out the TV for Pleasant Colony

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and jockey Jorge Velazquez
and trainer John Campo

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and the owner,
Thomas Mellon Evans,

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accept the quarter
of a million purse

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and their corner on
the world's happiness.

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As I watch the horseshoe
of roses being lowered on

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to Pleasant Colony's
neck, I think of my life

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and wonder how to cope with
my marriage coming down

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to certain divorce
and a son will

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be the subject of
long distance calls

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and for whom I'll be
an occasional visitor.

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Is he taller?

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I will ask.

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Is he doing well in school?

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And I will remember
kissing the soft part

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of his neck, the
velvet indentation

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by his collarbone, how I would
nuzzle it and he would giggle.

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On the TV, the winners
keep mouthing their thanks

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to the world as the jukebox
plays songs of infidelity

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and rejected love and the
girl with a dog collar

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keeps glancing at
the door waiting

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for Big John, who is a
phenomenon I have no faith in.

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The but damn it ail, I am wrong.

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Just when I think
it's a joke, in

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comes this big fellow and
the girl jumps to her feet.

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It's Big John, she says.

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And Big John looks
foolish and grins.

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He's a fat man and a red t-shirt
that doesn't reach his waist,

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so the roll of fat
looks like a white snake

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wrapped around his belly.

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But everybody's perking
up and the girls

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twitch their shoulders.

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Come on, shouts to
one of the dog collar.

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Big John's got his Winnebago.

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So, we troop out to the street
where the fog is rolling in,

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and parked at the curb
is a golden Winnebago

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with a huge stereo, soft chairs,
and all the beer you can drink.

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So what if you
don't know horses?

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So what if your
life's shot to hell?

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Hey, I shout, can your fat
God and his fat machine

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fix my life?

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Happy days ahead,
calls the girl,

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hanging from the back step.

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But before I can decide to
act, Big John hits the gas.

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The gutters of
Belfast are filled

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with the white feathers
of chickens trucked daily

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to the processing plant.

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And as Big John
takes off, feathers

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are swept up in his wake
like a taste of hot times.

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The Winnebago
disappears into the fog

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like some winged
Pegasus, I think,

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or Trojan horse cruising the
coastline for holiday villages

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to pillage and burn.

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In any case, it's gone.

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And on the dead
streets of Belfast,

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I find myself stuck
without wonderful racehorse

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joke or a satellite with which
to divert myself by watching.

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Where are the tricks to
help me through the day?

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It's here I must
take my first step,

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but I'm torn between Dark
Star, the Winnebago life,

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or finding my way
home, where my wife

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tries to push me from her heart
because I've told her she must.

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Think of the wedding pictures
and everybody laughing.

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Think of all the contemptible
ways to say goodbye.

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And unable to move a foot,
I turn this way and that.

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Dark Star, Dark Star, where
are the winners I was promised?

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Well, I'm not dumb.

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I know you only win when you bet
real money and play for keeps.

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Instead, I stand in the
street as feathers drift over

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my shoulders like Icarus.

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I ask myself, hopefully.

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No, just another damn fool
who won't make up his mind.

00:08:35.750 --> 00:08:36.664 align:middle line:90%
Thank you.

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[APPLAUSE]

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