WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.230 align:middle line:90% 00:00:01.230 --> 00:00:04.740 align:middle line:84% We were worried about that TV because the World 00:00:04.740 --> 00:00:05.958 align:middle line:90% Series is on today. 00:00:05.958 --> 00:00:11.840 align:middle line:90% 00:00:11.840 --> 00:00:12.840 align:middle line:90% I have to begin tonight. 00:00:12.840 --> 00:00:14.460 align:middle line:84% I'm going to read you a story called "The Whore's Child." 00:00:14.460 --> 00:00:16.827 align:middle line:84% But before I do that, I have to begin with an apology. 00:00:16.827 --> 00:00:18.660 align:middle line:84% I lived here for a long time, so, of course, 00:00:18.660 --> 00:00:21.990 align:middle line:84% I have a lot of apologies to a lot of [INAUDIBLE] people here. 00:00:21.990 --> 00:00:23.520 align:middle line:90% But I should probably-- 00:00:23.520 --> 00:00:25.350 align:middle line:84% I should probably-- just one apology, 00:00:25.350 --> 00:00:27.960 align:middle line:84% which is to I should apologize to all 00:00:27.960 --> 00:00:30.960 align:middle line:84% of the graduate students, current graduate students, 00:00:30.960 --> 00:00:33.210 align:middle line:84% in the English Department at the University of Arizona 00:00:33.210 --> 00:00:35.702 align:middle line:84% because I have done them over the years a disservice 00:00:35.702 --> 00:00:37.410 align:middle line:84% that they probably don't even know about. 00:00:37.410 --> 00:00:39.940 align:middle line:90% 00:00:39.940 --> 00:00:42.780 align:middle line:84% I came to the University of Arizona in 1967 00:00:42.780 --> 00:00:47.580 align:middle line:84% as an undergraduate, graduated, took my BA in 1971. 00:00:47.580 --> 00:00:52.920 align:middle line:84% That was the beginning of an extremely long journey 00:00:52.920 --> 00:00:55.170 align:middle line:90% through the English Department. 00:00:55.170 --> 00:01:01.350 align:middle line:84% I did then an MA starting in 1967, 00:01:01.350 --> 00:01:04.650 align:middle line:84% '68, which took a couple of years. 00:01:04.650 --> 00:01:10.800 align:middle line:84% And then I did a PhD, which took a lot of years. 00:01:10.800 --> 00:01:12.720 align:middle line:84% And I was supposed to be finished then 00:01:12.720 --> 00:01:17.100 align:middle line:84% but then went on and did an MFA in fiction. 00:01:17.100 --> 00:01:21.450 align:middle line:90% So I was here 1967, 1971. 00:01:21.450 --> 00:01:24.600 align:middle line:84% And then from 1971 through the 19-- 00:01:24.600 --> 00:01:28.110 align:middle line:90% it was 1980 when I left. 00:01:28.110 --> 00:01:32.880 align:middle line:84% And when I was getting ready to leave, 00:01:32.880 --> 00:01:36.510 align:middle line:84% the members of the English Department Faculty I know 00:01:36.510 --> 00:01:38.010 align:middle line:84% were putting into effect something 00:01:38.010 --> 00:01:40.710 align:middle line:84% that they must have called the Russo rule to make sure 00:01:40.710 --> 00:01:44.510 align:middle line:84% that nothing like this ever happened again, 00:01:44.510 --> 00:01:47.050 align:middle line:84% which means that graduate students now only get 00:01:47.050 --> 00:01:51.820 align:middle line:84% a certain number of years on their teaching assistantship. 00:01:51.820 --> 00:01:54.310 align:middle line:84% They probably wonder why in certain circumstances 00:01:54.310 --> 00:01:57.130 align:middle line:84% if they're doing good work they only get so many years, 00:01:57.130 --> 00:01:59.150 align:middle line:90% like four years or five years. 00:01:59.150 --> 00:02:00.400 align:middle line:90% And I am that reason. 00:02:00.400 --> 00:02:04.090 align:middle line:90% 00:02:04.090 --> 00:02:05.850 align:middle line:90% So I'm sorry. 00:02:05.850 --> 00:02:06.772 align:middle line:90% What can I say? 00:02:06.772 --> 00:02:10.000 align:middle line:90% 00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:16.070 align:middle line:84% I'm going to read a story called "The Whore's Child." 00:02:16.070 --> 00:02:19.580 align:middle line:84% "Sister Ursula belongs to an all but extinct order 00:02:19.580 --> 00:02:24.170 align:middle line:84% of Belgian nuns who conducted what little spiritual business 00:02:24.170 --> 00:02:27.590 align:middle line:84% remained to them from a decrepit old house purchased 00:02:27.590 --> 00:02:29.750 align:middle line:84% by the diocese seemingly because it 00:02:29.750 --> 00:02:33.120 align:middle line:90% was unlikely to outlast them. 00:02:33.120 --> 00:02:36.000 align:middle line:84% Since it was on Forest Avenue, a block from our house, 00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:38.340 align:middle line:84% I had seen Sister Ursula many times 00:02:38.340 --> 00:02:41.250 align:middle line:84% before the night she turned up in class, 00:02:41.250 --> 00:02:44.130 align:middle line:90% but we had never spoken. 00:02:44.130 --> 00:02:46.470 align:middle line:84% She drove a rusted out station wagon 00:02:46.470 --> 00:02:49.410 align:middle line:84% that was always crowded with elderly nuns who 00:02:49.410 --> 00:02:53.040 align:middle line:84% needed assistance getting in and getting out. 00:02:53.040 --> 00:02:56.400 align:middle line:84% Though St. Francis Church was only a few blocks away, 00:02:56.400 --> 00:02:59.010 align:middle line:84% that was too far to walk for any of them 00:02:59.010 --> 00:03:05.470 align:middle line:84% except Sister Ursula, her gait awkward but relentless. 00:03:05.470 --> 00:03:08.190 align:middle line:84% "You should go over there and introduce yourself someday, 00:03:08.190 --> 00:03:11.670 align:middle line:84% Gail," my wife suggested more than once. 00:03:11.670 --> 00:03:15.420 align:middle line:84% "Those old women have been left all alone." 00:03:15.420 --> 00:03:17.130 align:middle line:84% Her suspicion was later confirmed 00:03:17.130 --> 00:03:20.490 align:middle line:90% by Sister Ursula herself. 00:03:20.490 --> 00:03:24.540 align:middle line:84% "They are waiting for us to die," she confessed. 00:03:24.540 --> 00:03:28.140 align:middle line:84% "They are impatient of how we clutch to our miserable 00:03:28.140 --> 00:03:30.930 align:middle line:90% existences." 00:03:30.930 --> 00:03:32.760 align:middle line:84% "I'm sure you don't mean that," I 00:03:32.760 --> 00:03:36.450 align:middle line:84% said, an observation that was to become my mantra with her, 00:03:36.450 --> 00:03:40.890 align:middle line:84% and she in turn seemed to enjoy hearing me say it. 00:03:40.890 --> 00:03:42.870 align:middle line:84% She appeared in class that first night 00:03:42.870 --> 00:03:45.450 align:middle line:84% and settled herself at the very center of the seminar 00:03:45.450 --> 00:03:47.670 align:middle line:84% despite the fact that her name did not 00:03:47.670 --> 00:03:50.580 align:middle line:90% appear on my computer printout. 00:03:50.580 --> 00:03:53.340 align:middle line:84% Fiction writing classes are popular and invariably 00:03:53.340 --> 00:03:56.700 align:middle line:84% oversubscribed at most universities and never more so 00:03:56.700 --> 00:03:58.680 align:middle line:84% than when the writer teaching it has recently 00:03:58.680 --> 00:04:02.070 align:middle line:84% published a book as I had done in the past spring. 00:04:02.070 --> 00:04:03.690 align:middle line:84% Publishing the kind of book that's 00:04:03.690 --> 00:04:05.730 align:middle line:84% displayed in strip-mall bookstores 00:04:05.730 --> 00:04:08.700 align:middle line:84% bestows a celebrity on academic writers 00:04:08.700 --> 00:04:11.910 align:middle line:84% and separates them from their scholar colleagues 00:04:11.910 --> 00:04:15.360 align:middle line:84% whose books resemble the sort of dubious specialty items 00:04:15.360 --> 00:04:19.740 align:middle line:84% found only in boutiques and health food stores. 00:04:19.740 --> 00:04:23.580 align:middle line:84% I'd gotten quite a lot of press on my recent book and my first 00:04:23.580 --> 00:04:24.900 align:middle line:90% in over a decade. 00:04:24.900 --> 00:04:28.470 align:middle line:84% And my fleeting celebrity might have explained Sister Ursula's 00:04:28.470 --> 00:04:31.830 align:middle line:84% presence in my classroom that first chilly evening 00:04:31.830 --> 00:04:35.790 align:middle line:84% in the fall semester, though she gave no indication of this, 00:04:35.790 --> 00:04:38.880 align:middle line:84% or did she recognized me as her neighbor. 00:04:38.880 --> 00:04:41.730 align:middle line:84% No, Sister Ursula seemed innocent 00:04:41.730 --> 00:04:45.450 align:middle line:84% not only of me but also of all University 00:04:45.450 --> 00:04:47.430 align:middle line:90% and department protocol. 00:04:47.430 --> 00:04:50.490 align:middle line:84% When informed that students petition to take the advanced 00:04:50.490 --> 00:04:53.670 align:middle line:84% fiction writing class by means of a manuscript submission 00:04:53.670 --> 00:04:57.450 align:middle line:84% the previous term and that the course's prerequisites were 00:04:57.450 --> 00:05:00.060 align:middle line:84% beginning and intermediate courses, 00:05:00.060 --> 00:05:03.780 align:middle line:84% Sister Ursula disputed neither the existence nor the wisdom 00:05:03.780 --> 00:05:07.500 align:middle line:84% of these procedures, nor did she gather up her things 00:05:07.500 --> 00:05:11.730 align:middle line:84% and leave, which left me in an odd position. 00:05:11.730 --> 00:05:15.420 align:middle line:84% Normally, it's my policy not to allow unregistered students 00:05:15.420 --> 00:05:17.940 align:middle line:84% to remain in class because doing so 00:05:17.940 --> 00:05:21.660 align:middle line:84% encourages their mistaken belief that they can wheedle, cajole, 00:05:21.660 --> 00:05:23.740 align:middle line:90% or flatter their way in. 00:05:23.740 --> 00:05:27.600 align:middle line:84% In the past, I had shown even football players the door 00:05:27.600 --> 00:05:30.900 align:middle line:84% without the slightest courtesy or ceremony, 00:05:30.900 --> 00:05:33.930 align:middle line:84% but this was a different challenge entirely. 00:05:33.930 --> 00:05:38.030 align:middle line:84% Sister Ursula herself nearly as big as a linebacker-- 00:05:38.030 --> 00:05:39.780 align:middle line:84% was herself nearly as big as a linebacker, 00:05:39.780 --> 00:05:42.750 align:middle line:84% yet more persuasive than this was her body language, which 00:05:42.750 --> 00:05:46.530 align:middle line:84% suggested that once settled she was not used to moving. 00:05:46.530 --> 00:05:51.450 align:middle line:84% And since she was clearly settled, I let her stay. 00:05:51.450 --> 00:05:53.810 align:middle line:84% After class, however, I did explain 00:05:53.810 --> 00:05:56.240 align:middle line:84% why it would be highly unprofessional of me 00:05:56.240 --> 00:06:00.980 align:middle line:84% to allow her to remain in the advanced fiction workshop. 00:06:00.980 --> 00:06:03.890 align:middle line:84% After all, she freely admitted that she had never 00:06:03.890 --> 00:06:07.340 align:middle line:84% attempted to write a story before, which I explained, 00:06:07.340 --> 00:06:10.520 align:middle line:84% put her at an extreme disadvantage. 00:06:10.520 --> 00:06:13.625 align:middle line:84% My mistake was in not leaving the matter there 00:06:13.625 --> 00:06:16.220 align:middle line:90% but instead I went on. 00:06:16.220 --> 00:06:18.380 align:middle line:84% "This is a storytelling class, Sister. 00:06:18.380 --> 00:06:20.480 align:middle line:90% We're all liars here. 00:06:20.480 --> 00:06:22.340 align:middle line:84% The whole purpose of our enterprise 00:06:22.340 --> 00:06:26.630 align:middle line:84% is to become skilled in making things up and substituting 00:06:26.630 --> 00:06:29.000 align:middle line:90% our truth for the truth. 00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:34.400 align:middle line:84% In this class, we actually prefer a well told lie," 00:06:34.400 --> 00:06:38.540 align:middle line:84% I concluded, certain this would dissuade her. 00:06:38.540 --> 00:06:42.680 align:middle line:84% She patted my hand as you might the hand of a child. 00:06:42.680 --> 00:06:44.000 align:middle line:90% "Never you mind." 00:06:44.000 --> 00:06:46.430 align:middle line:84% She then assured me adjusting her wimple 00:06:46.430 --> 00:06:48.321 align:middle line:90% for the journey home. 00:06:48.321 --> 00:06:49.613 align:middle line:90% "My whole life has been a lie." 00:06:49.613 --> 00:06:51.405 align:middle line:84% "I'm sure you don't mean that" I told her." 00:06:51.405 --> 00:06:57.000 align:middle line:90%