WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.500 align:middle line:90% So I thought I had it made. 00:00:01.500 --> 00:00:06.090 align:middle line:84% I thought I was the pale figure the landscape I was born in, 00:00:06.090 --> 00:00:09.720 align:middle line:84% but could be transformed by making it out of paper 00:00:09.720 --> 00:00:11.880 align:middle line:90% as if it were tissue collage. 00:00:11.880 --> 00:00:16.260 align:middle line:84% And I thought well, the paper will be the ultimate suitor. 00:00:16.260 --> 00:00:21.420 align:middle line:84% That's where I can go next and of course the epigraph 00:00:21.420 --> 00:00:23.070 align:middle line:90% is always chosen last. 00:00:23.070 --> 00:00:27.300 align:middle line:84% And the epigraph for this book is from a letter 00:00:27.300 --> 00:00:29.310 align:middle line:84% that Vincent van Gogh wrote to his brothers. 00:00:29.310 --> 00:00:32.159 align:middle line:84% And it says, "I had begun to sign canvases 00:00:32.159 --> 00:00:35.310 align:middle line:84% but I soon stopped because it seemed too foolish. 00:00:35.310 --> 00:00:39.060 align:middle line:84% On one seascape, there is a clamorous red signature 00:00:39.060 --> 00:00:42.210 align:middle line:84% because I wanted a red note in the green." 00:00:42.210 --> 00:00:47.820 align:middle line:84% So I thought I had my identity down pat, the red signature. 00:00:47.820 --> 00:00:50.250 align:middle line:84% Not because I think that I'm so important 00:00:50.250 --> 00:00:52.650 align:middle line:84% but because I wanted it for the sake of the design 00:00:52.650 --> 00:00:56.380 align:middle line:84% this sense of form that Alison was talking about. 00:00:56.380 --> 00:01:05.580 align:middle line:84% But then that horizon that ends that book when it comes closer, 00:01:05.580 --> 00:01:07.860 align:middle line:90% that arrives at arm's length. 00:01:07.860 --> 00:01:11.250 align:middle line:84% The way a painter holds up a thumb to get scale. 00:01:11.250 --> 00:01:13.920 align:middle line:84% But when things start coming close 00:01:13.920 --> 00:01:16.350 align:middle line:84% and they start coming to houses, then what you get 00:01:16.350 --> 00:01:21.540 align:middle line:84% are doors, windows, porches, liminal places 00:01:21.540 --> 00:01:24.540 align:middle line:84% where one thing becomes another, where inside becomes outside. 00:01:24.540 --> 00:01:30.450 align:middle line:84% And the exuberance of being out the lone figure in landscape 00:01:30.450 --> 00:01:33.060 align:middle line:84% with all of the people nicely ensconced 00:01:33.060 --> 00:01:35.820 align:middle line:84% underneath their names whether they're gravestones 00:01:35.820 --> 00:01:40.620 align:middle line:84% yet or not, the memorial impulse of poetry is to put them there. 00:01:40.620 --> 00:01:44.340 align:middle line:84% What I found instead that was my life became tumultuous 00:01:44.340 --> 00:01:50.055 align:middle line:84% and that the position of the suitor on the porch 00:01:50.055 --> 00:01:51.180 align:middle line:90% comes knocking on the door. 00:01:51.180 --> 00:01:54.090 align:middle line:84% Somebody looking out the window that I 00:01:54.090 --> 00:01:57.690 align:middle line:84% was going to have to name that figure the penultimate suitor 00:01:57.690 --> 00:02:00.840 align:middle line:84% not prepared yet to say what might be or who might be, 00:02:00.840 --> 00:02:02.190 align:middle line:90% the ultimate suitor. 00:02:02.190 --> 00:02:07.740 align:middle line:84% And so these window figures started cropping up. 00:02:07.740 --> 00:02:09.990 align:middle line:84% Just a short poem to give you a flavor. 00:02:09.990 --> 00:02:12.870 align:middle line:90% "Man in top half of dutch door." 00:02:12.870 --> 00:02:15.960 align:middle line:84% Think about a dutch door as a door becoming a window so 00:02:15.960 --> 00:02:18.730 align:middle line:84% that this part of you can go out forever 00:02:18.730 --> 00:02:22.440 align:middle line:84% and ever, but from the waist down you feel constricted. 00:02:22.440 --> 00:02:25.470 align:middle line:90% "Man in top half of dutch door." 00:02:25.470 --> 00:02:29.010 align:middle line:84% "He stays inside for indiscernibility 00:02:29.010 --> 00:02:31.980 align:middle line:90% like tears beneath closed lids. 00:02:31.980 --> 00:02:35.850 align:middle line:84% Closed lids describe a shallow scalloped border. 00:02:35.850 --> 00:02:40.020 align:middle line:84% The kitten's muse describe a shallow scalloped border. 00:02:40.020 --> 00:02:43.500 align:middle line:84% Dusk erases chances, moots a day, 00:02:43.500 --> 00:02:47.010 align:middle line:84% invites a second widening of sight and sound 00:02:47.010 --> 00:02:50.160 align:middle line:84% and of his need to convey himself 00:02:50.160 --> 00:02:53.500 align:middle line:90% expanding broad rotations." 00:02:53.500 --> 00:02:54.000 align:middle line:90%