WEBVTT

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And when Miss Saigon came out,
it started a lot of arguments

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that I have with
different friends

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about the fact that
they wanted to cast

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a white guy as a Eurasian
and about the way that they

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took the Vietnam butterfly
plot from Madama Butterfly

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and just foisted it onto Vietnam
as if Vietnam and Japan were

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just the same thing.

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And the plot, David
Henry Hwang goes over

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how ridiculous the plot is
about this Asian woman who

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committed suicide over the
white Pinkerton or the white GI.

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Anyway, I have a long poem
in the book about my new book

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about that, but I'm
not going to read that,

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because it's so long.

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But I'm going to read you
a little afterward that I

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have to this.

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It's called "Two
Imperialist Ditties."

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The first is called "A
Little Song From Kipling."

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"There was a little
brown brother.

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There was a little brown sister.

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The brother called us master.

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The sister called us mister.

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And yes, their country was
warm and easy like a woman.

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We sampled each and
all their charms

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until she turned a demon.

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Oh, damn the East
and all its lies,

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oh, damn those ugly heathens.

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Damn there beauty
and their spies,

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and take me back to heaven."

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The second is "Caliban's Curse."

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And there's that line in The
Tempest where Caliban says,

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"you taught me language
and my profit on it is I

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know how to curse."

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"Oh, Mr. Moto, Fu
Manchu, Kung Fu ninja

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chopping you, Charlie Chan,
chink and Jap man, houseboy,

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gardener, laundry coolie,
Miss Saigon's chop chop suey.

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This is how our
balls were banned.

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This is where they
played our parts.

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Fuck their yellow
minstrel farce.

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Fuck them in their
white, white hearts.

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Fuck them till they
fall apart, weeping

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for their white, white art."

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And that came out of the fact
that when I saw Miss Saigon,

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the woman next to me was just
breaking up and tearing up.

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