WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:00.600 align:middle line:90% 00:00:00.600 --> 00:00:01.860 align:middle line:90% "Dear Linda. 00:00:01.860 --> 00:00:06.960 align:middle line:84% I found Joel. I was beginning to think you didn't have a cousin. 00:00:06.960 --> 00:00:09.240 align:middle line:84% Pandullo found him working on the frozen generators 00:00:09.240 --> 00:00:10.980 align:middle line:90% behind our tent. 00:00:10.980 --> 00:00:13.620 align:middle line:84% It rains hard at night and icicles freeze on the power 00:00:13.620 --> 00:00:16.200 align:middle line:90% lines and watchtowers. 00:00:16.200 --> 00:00:18.570 align:middle line:84% Pandullo and me throw rocks at them, 00:00:18.570 --> 00:00:21.600 align:middle line:84% knocking the big ones down and busting the layer of ice 00:00:21.600 --> 00:00:23.250 align:middle line:90% on top of the sand. 00:00:23.250 --> 00:00:26.820 align:middle line:84% The ground looks like broken glass when we're done. 00:00:26.820 --> 00:00:30.060 align:middle line:84% I started reading Che's diary again. 00:00:30.060 --> 00:00:31.200 align:middle line:90% I work nights. 00:00:31.200 --> 00:00:35.580 align:middle line:84% And afterward wait outside the comm-tent to call home. 00:00:35.580 --> 00:00:37.740 align:middle line:84% Most of the time I can't get through. 00:00:37.740 --> 00:00:39.480 align:middle line:90% But that's OK. 00:00:39.480 --> 00:00:42.870 align:middle line:84% My familia has things to worry about besides me. 00:00:42.870 --> 00:00:44.970 align:middle line:84% So I watched the sun rise over the burms 00:00:44.970 --> 00:00:48.120 align:middle line:84% and listen in on phone calls home. 00:00:48.120 --> 00:00:51.360 align:middle line:84% Country fights with his old lady, non-stop. 00:00:51.360 --> 00:00:55.990 align:middle line:84% And Pandullo does a lot of baby talk. 00:00:55.990 --> 00:00:58.660 align:middle line:84% I lose track of the days, each one passing 00:00:58.660 --> 00:01:00.670 align:middle line:84% like the same brain-dead movie they show 00:01:00.670 --> 00:01:04.239 align:middle line:90% over and over at the rec tent. 00:01:04.239 --> 00:01:07.660 align:middle line:84% Your cousin, by the way, is an AGE troop. 00:01:07.660 --> 00:01:10.960 align:middle line:84% I asked him for your address to make sure I have the right one. 00:01:10.960 --> 00:01:12.880 align:middle line:90% But he didn't know it. 00:01:12.880 --> 00:01:15.040 align:middle line:84% He told me he went to school in New Mexico. 00:01:15.040 --> 00:01:18.130 align:middle line:84% And I felt better knowing you didn't lie. 00:01:18.130 --> 00:01:20.200 align:middle line:84% But he said to watch out for you, 00:01:20.200 --> 00:01:23.470 align:middle line:84% that you think you're all good, and wouldn't write back 00:01:23.470 --> 00:01:26.920 align:middle line:84% no matter how many pages I sent to you. 00:01:26.920 --> 00:01:30.790 align:middle line:84% I wanted to fuck him up for saying that. 00:01:30.790 --> 00:01:33.290 align:middle line:84% Che wrote that during his trip to South America 00:01:33.290 --> 00:01:36.940 align:middle line:84% he wanted to help all the poor people he met. 00:01:36.940 --> 00:01:39.040 align:middle line:90% Maybe that's why I'm here. 00:01:39.040 --> 00:01:41.170 align:middle line:90% I could be as good as that dude. 00:01:41.170 --> 00:01:44.860 align:middle line:84% I told Joel how you'd wanted me at that bookstore. 00:01:44.860 --> 00:01:47.020 align:middle line:90% I could tell. 00:01:47.020 --> 00:01:49.480 align:middle line:90% Joel called you a snob. 00:01:49.480 --> 00:01:51.640 align:middle line:84% I don't know why you want me to keep a lookout 00:01:51.640 --> 00:01:55.390 align:middle line:90% on a guy like Joel, but I will. 00:01:55.390 --> 00:01:57.280 align:middle line:90% Please write soon, Tomás. 00:01:57.280 --> 00:02:00.620 align:middle line:90% 00:02:00.620 --> 00:02:02.240 align:middle line:90% Linda. 00:02:02.240 --> 00:02:04.430 align:middle line:90% I talked to Ma on the phone. 00:02:04.430 --> 00:02:06.800 align:middle line:90% She's not doing too good. 00:02:06.800 --> 00:02:08.660 align:middle line:90% Tata is still in a coma. 00:02:08.660 --> 00:02:11.360 align:middle line:90% And now she sees the ghosts. 00:02:11.360 --> 00:02:14.390 align:middle line:84% They hang out in the backyard and around the porch and wait 00:02:14.390 --> 00:02:16.145 align:middle line:90% for a train that never arrives. 00:02:16.145 --> 00:02:19.350 align:middle line:90% 00:02:19.350 --> 00:02:21.090 align:middle line:90% Pancho Villa is with them. 00:02:21.090 --> 00:02:23.880 align:middle line:84% And he's stolen all the corn from the house, all the cans 00:02:23.880 --> 00:02:27.840 align:middle line:84% and frozen bags, even the tortillas. 00:02:27.840 --> 00:02:30.630 align:middle line:84% He screamed at her, told her the soldiers wouldn't make it 00:02:30.630 --> 00:02:33.450 align:middle line:90% past winter without supplies. 00:02:33.450 --> 00:02:37.050 align:middle line:84% Ma made me promise to read my Bible and pray hard for things 00:02:37.050 --> 00:02:39.390 align:middle line:90% to get right. 00:02:39.390 --> 00:02:42.300 align:middle line:84% I went to the chapel tent after we talked. 00:02:42.300 --> 00:02:43.740 align:middle line:90% I found the base chaplain. 00:02:43.740 --> 00:02:46.350 align:middle line:84% And it turned out he had bibles to give away. 00:02:46.350 --> 00:02:48.990 align:middle line:90% And I took two small ones. 00:02:48.990 --> 00:02:52.740 align:middle line:84% I keep one under my pillow and the other in my pocket. 00:02:52.740 --> 00:02:56.190 align:middle line:84% That way I can finish reading the whole thing. 00:02:56.190 --> 00:02:59.700 align:middle line:84% I've started praying to San Judas and Santo Niño. 00:02:59.700 --> 00:03:02.250 align:middle line:84% But I don't know if praying works. 00:03:02.250 --> 00:03:08.460 align:middle line:84% It feels a lot like wishing, which I know doesn't. 00:03:08.460 --> 00:03:10.290 align:middle line:84% I sometimes close my eyes and try 00:03:10.290 --> 00:03:12.440 align:middle line:90% to remember what you look like. 00:03:12.440 --> 00:03:15.930 align:middle line:84% Country thinks I'm sleeping on the job. 00:03:15.930 --> 00:03:19.680 align:middle line:84% I remember your face, your wide nose, and chubby earlobes, 00:03:19.680 --> 00:03:22.260 align:middle line:90% your black hair. 00:03:22.260 --> 00:03:23.940 align:middle line:90% I don't know why I do this. 00:03:23.940 --> 00:03:26.940 align:middle line:90% Why you stick in my head so bad. 00:03:26.940 --> 00:03:28.890 align:middle line:84% I know I'm making too much of you. 00:03:28.890 --> 00:03:30.660 align:middle line:90% But something forces me. 00:03:30.660 --> 00:03:34.230 align:middle line:84% Like if I don't, I won't remember who I was or am 00:03:34.230 --> 00:03:36.990 align:middle line:90% when this is over. 00:03:36.990 --> 00:03:39.960 align:middle line:84% Ma told me Pops spends his day at the hospital crying 00:03:39.960 --> 00:03:41.760 align:middle line:90% for Tata. 00:03:41.760 --> 00:03:46.410 align:middle line:84% I've never seen him even sad, only pissed off. 00:03:46.410 --> 00:03:48.660 align:middle line:90% I don't know who else to tell. 00:03:48.660 --> 00:03:53.160 align:middle line:84% I don't want people to think I'm losing it or going soft. 00:03:53.160 --> 00:03:56.700 align:middle line:84% Your cousin has been avoiding me around camp. 00:03:56.700 --> 00:03:59.730 align:middle line:84% Now that I know him, I see him everywhere: 00:03:59.730 --> 00:04:04.530 align:middle line:84% the Chow tent, the PO tent, the laundry trailer. 00:04:04.530 --> 00:04:07.860 align:middle line:84% Have you told him something fucked up about me? 00:04:07.860 --> 00:04:09.885 align:middle line:90% I want to go home. 00:04:09.885 --> 00:04:10.385 align:middle line:90% Tomás. 00:04:10.385 --> 00:04:13.950 align:middle line:90% 00:04:13.950 --> 00:04:15.900 align:middle line:90% Dear Tomás. 00:04:15.900 --> 00:04:18.420 align:middle line:90% Please do not write me again. 00:04:18.420 --> 00:04:20.670 align:middle line:90% You sound like a crazy person. 00:04:20.670 --> 00:04:22.710 align:middle line:84% And have the wrong idea about us. 00:04:22.710 --> 00:04:25.710 align:middle line:84% And your letters, the third one especially, 00:04:25.710 --> 00:04:28.590 align:middle line:90% were completely inappropriate. 00:04:28.590 --> 00:04:32.760 align:middle line:84% We had a nice talk at the bookstore, but that is all. 00:04:32.760 --> 00:04:34.698 align:middle line:90% You seemed interested in Che. 00:04:34.698 --> 00:04:36.990 align:middle line:84% And I thought you could use some background information 00:04:36.990 --> 00:04:39.030 align:middle line:84% before you wasted your money on something 00:04:39.030 --> 00:04:41.760 align:middle line:90% you would not understand. 00:04:41.760 --> 00:04:44.730 align:middle line:90% I regret giving you my address. 00:04:44.730 --> 00:04:46.260 align:middle line:90% I felt sorry for you. 00:04:46.260 --> 00:04:49.290 align:middle line:84% You should forget about me and reconsider things with Ana. 00:04:49.290 --> 00:04:53.700 align:middle line:84% The way you describe her, she sounds perfect for you. 00:04:53.700 --> 00:04:58.260 align:middle line:84% Also what you and your friends are doing over there is wrong. 00:04:58.260 --> 00:05:01.140 align:middle line:84% If I had known what you did specifically, 00:05:01.140 --> 00:05:04.470 align:middle line:84% I would not have spoken with you in the first place. 00:05:04.470 --> 00:05:08.130 align:middle line:84% At least my cousin only fixes heaters. 00:05:08.130 --> 00:05:10.530 align:middle line:90% You need to wake up. 00:05:10.530 --> 00:05:14.130 align:middle line:84% What you're doing there is nothing like what Che did. 00:05:14.130 --> 00:05:17.220 align:middle line:84% He gave up all he had to protect the poor, 00:05:17.220 --> 00:05:19.650 align:middle line:90% all of his family's wealth. 00:05:19.650 --> 00:05:21.580 align:middle line:90% What have you given up? 00:05:21.580 --> 00:05:24.280 align:middle line:90% Who are you protecting? 00:05:24.280 --> 00:05:24.780 align:middle line:90% Linda. 00:05:24.780 --> 00:05:27.740 align:middle line:90% 00:05:27.740 --> 00:05:30.170 align:middle line:90% Dear, Linda Guzmán. 00:05:30.170 --> 00:05:32.420 align:middle line:90% You lied in your letter. 00:05:32.420 --> 00:05:36.410 align:middle line:84% I can tell when a girl is into me, and you were. 00:05:36.410 --> 00:05:39.950 align:middle line:84% You talked about revolutions and corporations 00:05:39.950 --> 00:05:43.760 align:middle line:84% and then waited to see if I was impressed. 00:05:43.760 --> 00:05:45.200 align:middle line:90% We had a dance going. 00:05:45.200 --> 00:05:47.870 align:middle line:90% And I let you lead. 00:05:47.870 --> 00:05:50.910 align:middle line:84% You can put whatever you want in your letters, 00:05:50.910 --> 00:05:53.630 align:middle line:90% but I know what I know. 00:05:53.630 --> 00:05:57.980 align:middle line:84% Che was a soldier, fighting and killing, everything 00:05:57.980 --> 00:06:00.050 align:middle line:90% that could happen here. 00:06:00.050 --> 00:06:04.100 align:middle line:84% If my parents had had money, who knows? 00:06:04.100 --> 00:06:06.260 align:middle line:84% I could have been smart like him, 00:06:06.260 --> 00:06:09.980 align:middle line:84% had the chance to act brave and abandon everything for a cause, 00:06:09.980 --> 00:06:12.215 align:middle line:84% instead of hoping to make my own life better. 00:06:12.215 --> 00:06:15.130 align:middle line:90% 00:06:15.130 --> 00:06:19.720 align:middle line:84% Still, I understand what Che writes and what he means. 00:06:19.720 --> 00:06:22.480 align:middle line:84% 'The stars drew light across the night sky 00:06:22.480 --> 00:06:24.460 align:middle line:90% in that little mountain village. 00:06:24.460 --> 00:06:28.960 align:middle line:84% And the silence and the cold make the darkness vanish away. 00:06:28.960 --> 00:06:33.160 align:middle line:84% It was as if everything solid melted away into the ether, 00:06:33.160 --> 00:06:37.600 align:middle line:84% eliminating all individuality and absorbing us rigid 00:06:37.600 --> 00:06:40.570 align:middle line:90% into the immense darkness.' 00:06:40.570 --> 00:06:43.210 align:middle line:84% After reading so much of these words, words 00:06:43.210 --> 00:06:45.820 align:middle line:90% I can't put together myself. 00:06:45.820 --> 00:06:48.910 align:middle line:84% I know this is the kind of vato you go for, 00:06:48.910 --> 00:06:52.300 align:middle line:90% even when you want one like me. 00:06:52.300 --> 00:06:55.300 align:middle line:84% We've been flying the shit out of our planes. 00:06:55.300 --> 00:06:58.420 align:middle line:84% Country thinks the war could kick up any day. 00:06:58.420 --> 00:07:00.850 align:middle line:84% He's still fighting with his wife. 00:07:00.850 --> 00:07:05.140 align:middle line:84% She's missed some bills and his kid got expelled from school. 00:07:05.140 --> 00:07:07.300 align:middle line:90% She wants a divorce. 00:07:07.300 --> 00:07:10.780 align:middle line:90% I almost feel sorry for him. 00:07:10.780 --> 00:07:13.180 align:middle line:84% Pandullo can't get a hold of his wife. 00:07:13.180 --> 00:07:16.000 align:middle line:84% He thinks she moved back to New Jersey with her parents, 00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:18.610 align:middle line:84% cleaned out their house, and turned off the phone, 00:07:18.610 --> 00:07:20.590 align:middle line:90% took the kid. 00:07:20.590 --> 00:07:22.630 align:middle line:90% He cries at night. 00:07:22.630 --> 00:07:26.050 align:middle line:84% I've tried the Bible but the words are hard. 00:07:26.050 --> 00:07:30.760 align:middle line:84% I feel stupid and I can't get a hold of anyone back home. 00:07:30.760 --> 00:07:32.310 align:middle line:90% Tomás." 00:07:32.310 --> 00:07:33.000 align:middle line:90%