WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.952 align:middle line:90% [ETHEREAL SINGING] 00:00:03.952 --> 00:00:53.608 align:middle line:90% 00:00:53.608 --> 00:00:57.101 align:middle line:90% [BIRDS CHIRPING] 00:00:57.101 --> 00:01:12.140 align:middle line:90% 00:01:12.140 --> 00:01:16.910 align:middle line:84% Sometimes the sun is still trying to get to the horizon 00:01:16.910 --> 00:01:22.490 align:middle line:84% when a daylight moon comes up, fragile and almost transparent. 00:01:22.490 --> 00:01:26.390 align:middle line:84% The ghost of a white bird with damaged wings 00:01:26.390 --> 00:01:31.760 align:middle line:84% blown from its course and lost in the huge desert sky. 00:01:31.760 --> 00:01:37.330 align:middle line:84% It is the least protected of all unprotected things. 00:01:37.330 --> 00:01:41.200 align:middle line:84% A little wind goes by through the greasewood, heading home 00:01:41.200 --> 00:01:44.410 align:middle line:84% to its nest among blue vein stones 00:01:44.410 --> 00:01:47.260 align:middle line:84% where it will circle three times and curl up 00:01:47.260 --> 00:01:52.300 align:middle line:84% to sleep before darkness falls straight down like a tile 00:01:52.300 --> 00:01:55.880 align:middle line:84% from the roof of a tall building. 00:01:55.880 --> 00:01:59.570 align:middle line:84% There are families of stones under the ground. 00:01:59.570 --> 00:02:04.390 align:middle line:84% As the young stones grow, they rise slowly, like moons. 00:02:04.390 --> 00:02:08.740 align:middle line:84% When they reach the surface, they are old and holy, 00:02:08.740 --> 00:02:12.730 align:middle line:84% and when they break open, they give off a rich odor, 00:02:12.730 --> 00:02:19.250 align:middle line:84% each blooming once in the light after centuries of waiting. 00:02:19.250 --> 00:02:23.000 align:middle line:84% Those who have lived here longest and know best 00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:25.770 align:middle line:90% are least conspicuous. 00:02:25.770 --> 00:02:30.810 align:middle line:84% The oldest mountains are lowest, and the scorpion sleeps all day 00:02:30.810 --> 00:02:33.820 align:middle line:90% beneath a broken stone. 00:02:33.820 --> 00:02:39.380 align:middle line:84% If I stay here long enough, I will learn the art of silence. 00:02:39.380 --> 00:02:44.738 align:middle line:84% When I have given up words, I will become what I have to say. 00:02:44.738 --> 00:02:48.224 align:middle line:90% [BIRDS CHIRPING] 00:02:48.224 --> 00:03:01.690 align:middle line:90% 00:03:01.690 --> 00:03:04.450 align:middle line:84% Command the stones in a loud voice 00:03:04.450 --> 00:03:07.750 align:middle line:84% or speak to them just to the left of silence, 00:03:07.750 --> 00:03:12.820 align:middle line:84% or sing them a love song in Spanish, they will not respond. 00:03:12.820 --> 00:03:14.260 align:middle line:90% Write a letter. 00:03:14.260 --> 00:03:18.460 align:middle line:84% In it, confess all your sins, place it under a stone, 00:03:18.460 --> 00:03:20.570 align:middle line:90% leave it there for months. 00:03:20.570 --> 00:03:23.260 align:middle line:84% And when you return you will find your letter 00:03:23.260 --> 00:03:26.520 align:middle line:90% unopened and unread. 00:03:26.520 --> 00:03:29.400 align:middle line:84% Stones have a sense of dignity greater 00:03:29.400 --> 00:03:31.870 align:middle line:84% than that of kings, a sense of honor 00:03:31.870 --> 00:03:34.670 align:middle line:90% stronger than that of friends. 00:03:34.670 --> 00:03:40.250 align:middle line:84% Stones are fulfilled like prophecy, tendentious as rain, 00:03:40.250 --> 00:03:45.580 align:middle line:84% and have a sense of humor more subtle than we can comprehend. 00:03:45.580 --> 00:03:50.140 align:middle line:84% It takes a long time to amuse a stone. 00:03:50.140 --> 00:03:54.820 align:middle line:84% First, you must capture one, carry it away, imprison it 00:03:54.820 --> 00:03:56.890 align:middle line:90% with mortar in a wall. 00:03:56.890 --> 00:03:59.790 align:middle line:90% The stone will not complain. 00:03:59.790 --> 00:04:03.000 align:middle line:84% Then you must wait, and years after you 00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:07.230 align:middle line:84% are gone under another stone on which some stranger carved 00:04:07.230 --> 00:04:11.100 align:middle line:84% your name, the mortar and your wall will crumble, 00:04:11.100 --> 00:04:15.690 align:middle line:84% and the stone you captured will fall to the ground amused 00:04:15.690 --> 00:04:20.208 align:middle line:90% and free and going home. 00:04:20.208 --> 00:04:23.652 align:middle line:90% [WIND BLOWING] 00:04:23.652 --> 00:04:48.780 align:middle line:90% 00:04:48.780 --> 00:04:53.790 align:middle line:84% Nobody can stop this dry wind, this disaster of a wind. 00:04:53.790 --> 00:04:57.930 align:middle line:84% Nobody can heal it, soothe it, send it on. 00:04:57.930 --> 00:04:59.040 align:middle line:90% It remains. 00:04:59.040 --> 00:05:01.110 align:middle line:90% Has it nowhere else to go? 00:05:01.110 --> 00:05:05.380 align:middle line:84% Has it been forbidden to return where it came from? 00:05:05.380 --> 00:05:08.950 align:middle line:84% It is driving us mad with the sound of a wound being 00:05:08.950 --> 00:05:11.500 align:middle line:90% torn open again and again. 00:05:11.500 --> 00:05:15.250 align:middle line:84% It can bend us down as it bends the greasewood branches. 00:05:15.250 --> 00:05:18.840 align:middle line:90% It can desiccate our minds. 00:05:18.840 --> 00:05:22.800 align:middle line:84% It screams at us with the voice of a raging mute who 00:05:22.800 --> 00:05:26.210 align:middle line:90% has no words to tell his pain. 00:05:26.210 --> 00:05:28.550 align:middle line:84% When we begin to scream in return, 00:05:28.550 --> 00:05:30.950 align:middle line:84% it rips the words from our mouths, 00:05:30.950 --> 00:05:36.560 align:middle line:84% replacing them with sand and the taste of all the evil ever done 00:05:36.560 --> 00:05:40.850 align:middle line:84% to us by those who died before we could tell them 00:05:40.850 --> 00:05:42.932 align:middle line:90% how much we hated them. 00:05:42.932 --> 00:05:46.376 align:middle line:90% [WIND BLOWING] 00:05:46.376 --> 00:06:05.110 align:middle line:90% 00:06:05.110 --> 00:06:11.150 align:middle line:84% Stranger, do not be afraid of the emptiness around you. 00:06:11.150 --> 00:06:13.670 align:middle line:84% If you remain here, your eyes will 00:06:13.670 --> 00:06:17.720 align:middle line:84% grow accustomed to desert light, then 00:06:17.720 --> 00:06:21.270 align:middle line:84% you will be able to distinguish between seasons. 00:06:21.270 --> 00:06:24.890 align:middle line:84% You will begin to see the citizens of this country 00:06:24.890 --> 00:06:28.500 align:middle line:90% and realize you are not alone. 00:06:28.500 --> 00:06:32.280 align:middle line:84% As each sun rolls over you on its journey West, 00:06:32.280 --> 00:06:35.220 align:middle line:84% you will grow quieter with listening, 00:06:35.220 --> 00:06:39.060 align:middle line:84% until you can hear the dry whispers of scorpions 00:06:39.060 --> 00:06:42.270 align:middle line:84% and the mountains grinding against one another 00:06:42.270 --> 00:06:44.610 align:middle line:90% with desire. 00:06:44.610 --> 00:06:49.500 align:middle line:84% The cloudless sky will send all shadows to places of refuge, 00:06:49.500 --> 00:06:52.290 align:middle line:84% but you will live on the head of a pin 00:06:52.290 --> 00:06:54.780 align:middle line:90% where your needs are balanced. 00:06:54.780 --> 00:06:59.850 align:middle line:84% And night comes as a knife so sharp you feel no pain, 00:06:59.850 --> 00:07:03.570 align:middle line:84% but there is a new scar every morning. 00:07:03.570 --> 00:07:07.650 align:middle line:84% If you give the scars a home and cherish them, 00:07:07.650 --> 00:07:12.180 align:middle line:84% you will become silent and worthy of exile, 00:07:12.180 --> 00:07:15.780 align:middle line:84% and beautiful beyond all witnessing. 00:07:15.780 --> 00:07:19.780 align:middle line:90% 00:07:19.780 --> 00:07:23.280 align:middle line:90% [CRICKETS CHIRPING] 00:07:23.280 --> 00:07:54.280 align:middle line:90% 00:07:54.280 --> 00:07:57.730 align:middle line:84% The teeth of these mountains were worn down 00:07:57.730 --> 00:08:01.900 align:middle line:84% by an ancient inland sea to whose dry bed 00:08:01.900 --> 00:08:06.930 align:middle line:84% we have come uninvited and unacceptable. 00:08:06.930 --> 00:08:09.720 align:middle line:84% The sun, which bore down all day on Sonora, 00:08:09.720 --> 00:08:12.990 align:middle line:84% is falling into an ocean far to the West, 00:08:12.990 --> 00:08:15.420 align:middle line:84% leaving patches of shadow trapped 00:08:15.420 --> 00:08:21.060 align:middle line:84% in arroyos and huge wands of color in the sky. 00:08:21.060 --> 00:08:24.990 align:middle line:84% On the East slope, a flash of acacia, greasewood, and palo 00:08:24.990 --> 00:08:28.110 align:middle line:84% verde, a moment of green light as brief 00:08:28.110 --> 00:08:31.490 align:middle line:84% and precise as a moment of truth, 00:08:31.490 --> 00:08:34.850 align:middle line:84% then silence after the sun's crescendo. 00:08:34.850 --> 00:08:38.510 align:middle line:90% Cool air after a long fever. 00:08:38.510 --> 00:08:43.640 align:middle line:84% The protective walls of darkness after the phantoms and mirages 00:08:43.640 --> 00:08:47.790 align:middle line:90% of too much light and space. 00:08:47.790 --> 00:08:52.320 align:middle line:84% Suddenly a cacophony of coyotes wailing and torment 00:08:52.320 --> 00:08:56.480 align:middle line:84% for the moon to rise and rescue them from hell, 00:08:56.480 --> 00:08:59.840 align:middle line:84% and a huge tarantula hauls herself 00:08:59.840 --> 00:09:02.990 align:middle line:84% over her threshold in search of love, 00:09:02.990 --> 00:09:07.250 align:middle line:84% in search of a small mate who will not survive 00:09:07.250 --> 00:09:10.660 align:middle line:90% the violence of her embrace. 00:09:10.660 --> 00:09:14.560 align:middle line:84% While two young rabbits huddle under a prickly pear, 00:09:14.560 --> 00:09:18.640 align:middle line:84% their eyes opaque with fear, and the great bull 00:09:18.640 --> 00:09:22.690 align:middle line:84% snake having been aloof from the world for seven 00:09:22.690 --> 00:09:28.960 align:middle line:84% days and nights, again feels hunger and flows out silently 00:09:28.960 --> 00:09:36.451 align:middle line:84% with the perfection of ultimate grace into his starry kingdom. 00:09:36.451 --> 00:09:39.930 align:middle line:90% [CRICKETS CHIRPING] 00:09:39.930 --> 00:09:42.912 align:middle line:90% 00:09:42.912 --> 00:09:46.391 align:middle line:90% [COYOTES HOWLING] 00:09:46.391 --> 00:09:52.860 align:middle line:90% 00:09:52.860 --> 00:09:56.520 align:middle line:84% Out here, when the moon rises and Sonora 00:09:56.520 --> 00:10:00.240 align:middle line:84% is covered with silence brilliant as snow, 00:10:00.240 --> 00:10:04.230 align:middle line:90% I walk into a dream unafraid. 00:10:04.230 --> 00:10:07.680 align:middle line:84% Down there in the valley lights go on at night, 00:10:07.680 --> 00:10:11.730 align:middle line:84% but out here the stars are alive and well, 00:10:11.730 --> 00:10:15.000 align:middle line:90% and each has a secret name. 00:10:15.000 --> 00:10:19.020 align:middle line:84% Out here I am alone, but this is my country, 00:10:19.020 --> 00:10:22.050 align:middle line:84% well past the halfway point where 00:10:22.050 --> 00:10:25.980 align:middle line:84% I learned that my death will be the only thing I ever 00:10:25.980 --> 00:10:28.740 align:middle line:90% truly possess. 00:10:28.740 --> 00:10:31.050 align:middle line:90% Out here nothing needs me. 00:10:31.050 --> 00:10:32.880 align:middle line:90% Nothing fails me. 00:10:32.880 --> 00:10:37.050 align:middle line:84% I lie down in the bed of an arroyo, look at the stars, 00:10:37.050 --> 00:10:38.430 align:middle line:90% and forget. 00:10:38.430 --> 00:10:42.550 align:middle line:84% First the promises made to myself, kept or broken, 00:10:42.550 --> 00:10:44.610 align:middle line:84% then the promises made to others, 00:10:44.610 --> 00:10:50.180 align:middle line:84% then my name, place of birth, the numbers, and all the rest. 00:10:50.180 --> 00:10:53.870 align:middle line:84% When there is nothing left, I remember the precision 00:10:53.870 --> 00:10:58.400 align:middle line:84% of the hummingbird piercing the dark heart of the hibiscus 00:10:58.400 --> 00:11:01.410 align:middle line:90% and doing no damage. 00:11:01.410 --> 00:11:05.070 align:middle line:84% I begin to hear night breathing through me, 00:11:05.070 --> 00:11:10.440 align:middle line:84% and I do not know what death is except silence, which does not 00:11:10.440 --> 00:11:15.210 align:middle line:84% last forever, and wisdom, which will teach me 00:11:15.210 --> 00:11:18.030 align:middle line:90% the secret names of the stars. 00:11:18.030 --> 00:11:21.474 align:middle line:90% [CRICKETS CHIRPING] 00:11:21.474 --> 00:11:40.210 align:middle line:90% 00:11:40.210 --> 00:11:43.870 align:middle line:84% Because the moon comes straight up from the mountain, 00:11:43.870 --> 00:11:48.310 align:middle line:84% like the hidden possibility of madness escaped for everyone 00:11:48.310 --> 00:11:51.880 align:middle line:84% to see, and the wandering stars who 00:11:51.880 --> 00:11:57.080 align:middle line:84% are said to rule our lives wander on in darkness, 00:11:57.080 --> 00:12:01.220 align:middle line:84% I feel a need to lie down among the stones and caress 00:12:01.220 --> 00:12:05.160 align:middle line:90% any of them who have survived. 00:12:05.160 --> 00:12:09.120 align:middle line:84% I always looked for what I wanted in the wrong places 00:12:09.120 --> 00:12:13.920 align:middle line:84% until the desert taught me to want what I found. 00:12:13.920 --> 00:12:17.400 align:middle line:84% Now on summer nights, I sit in the garden 00:12:17.400 --> 00:12:23.630 align:middle line:84% where it is hot and dry and young stones grow like weeds. 00:12:23.630 --> 00:12:26.990 align:middle line:84% When the moon turns a mad white face upon me, 00:12:26.990 --> 00:12:31.610 align:middle line:84% having nothing to offer, I hold up my empty hands. 00:12:31.610 --> 00:12:35.710 align:middle line:90% It is so easy to be happy. 00:12:35.710 --> 00:12:40.390 align:middle line:84% This morning a woodpecker woke me practicing on his drum, 00:12:40.390 --> 00:12:44.470 align:middle line:84% and all afternoon cicadas rang like the telephones 00:12:44.470 --> 00:12:47.150 align:middle line:90% I haven't answered. 00:12:47.150 --> 00:12:50.330 align:middle line:84% I am what has become of me, a man 00:12:50.330 --> 00:12:53.860 align:middle line:84% who lives in the desert, where coyotes 00:12:53.860 --> 00:12:57.010 align:middle line:84% wail more skillfully than hired mourners 00:12:57.010 --> 00:13:00.170 align:middle line:84% at the funeral of an Eastern King. 00:13:00.170 --> 00:13:03.890 align:middle line:84% Where every night, the stars whose light I have not 00:13:03.890 --> 00:13:09.620 align:middle line:84% earned and will never deserve, return as if to keep a promise. 00:13:09.620 --> 00:13:15.964 align:middle line:84% And even the rain, when it falls, is coming home. 00:13:15.964 --> 00:13:19.296 align:middle line:90% [COYOTES HOWLING] 00:13:19.296 --> 00:13:24.070 align:middle line:90% 00:13:24.070 --> 00:13:26.080 align:middle line:84% I love to go out on summer nights 00:13:26.080 --> 00:13:28.630 align:middle line:90% and watch the stones grow. 00:13:28.630 --> 00:13:32.650 align:middle line:84% I think they grow better here in the desert where it is warm 00:13:32.650 --> 00:13:35.930 align:middle line:90% and dry then almost anywhere. 00:13:35.930 --> 00:13:41.440 align:middle line:84% Or perhaps it is only that the young ones more active here. 00:13:41.440 --> 00:13:45.670 align:middle line:84% Young stones tend to move about more than their elders consider 00:13:45.670 --> 00:13:47.440 align:middle line:90% good for them. 00:13:47.440 --> 00:13:50.560 align:middle line:84% Most young stones have a secret desire, 00:13:50.560 --> 00:13:52.720 align:middle line:84% which their parents had before them 00:13:52.720 --> 00:13:55.600 align:middle line:90% but have forgotten ages ago. 00:13:55.600 --> 00:14:00.910 align:middle line:84% And because this desire involves water, it is never mentioned. 00:14:00.910 --> 00:14:04.930 align:middle line:84% The older stones disapprove of water, and say, 00:14:04.930 --> 00:14:08.560 align:middle line:84% water is a gadfly who never stays in one place long enough 00:14:08.560 --> 00:14:10.580 align:middle line:90% to learn anything. 00:14:10.580 --> 00:14:13.610 align:middle line:84% But the young stones try to work themselves 00:14:13.610 --> 00:14:18.080 align:middle line:84% into a position slowly and without their elders noticing 00:14:18.080 --> 00:14:23.120 align:middle line:84% it, in which a sizeable stream of water during a summer storm 00:14:23.120 --> 00:14:26.330 align:middle line:84% might catch them broadside and unknowing, 00:14:26.330 --> 00:14:32.880 align:middle line:84% so to speak, and push them along over a slope or down an arroyo. 00:14:32.880 --> 00:14:35.250 align:middle line:84% In spite of the danger this involves, 00:14:35.250 --> 00:14:38.340 align:middle line:84% they want to travel and see something of the world 00:14:38.340 --> 00:14:41.940 align:middle line:84% and settle in a new place far from the domination 00:14:41.940 --> 00:14:44.100 align:middle line:90% of their parents. 00:14:44.100 --> 00:14:48.540 align:middle line:84% And although family ties are very strong among stones, 00:14:48.540 --> 00:14:52.470 align:middle line:84% many of the more daring young ones have succeeded, 00:14:52.470 --> 00:14:55.770 align:middle line:84% and they carry scars to prove to their children 00:14:55.770 --> 00:15:00.090 align:middle line:84% that they once went on a journey helter skelter and high water 00:15:00.090 --> 00:15:05.930 align:middle line:84% and traveled perhaps 15 feet, an incredible distance. 00:15:05.930 --> 00:15:08.420 align:middle line:84% As they grow older, they cease to brag 00:15:08.420 --> 00:15:12.320 align:middle line:84% about such clandestine adventures. 00:15:12.320 --> 00:15:16.860 align:middle line:84% It is true that old stones get to be very conservative. 00:15:16.860 --> 00:15:20.150 align:middle line:84% They consider all movement either dangerous 00:15:20.150 --> 00:15:23.000 align:middle line:90% or downright sinful. 00:15:23.000 --> 00:15:28.230 align:middle line:84% They remain comfortably where they are and often get fat. 00:15:28.230 --> 00:15:33.730 align:middle line:84% Fatness, as a matter of fact, is a mark of distinction. 00:15:33.730 --> 00:15:38.090 align:middle line:84% And on summer nights after the young stones are asleep, 00:15:38.090 --> 00:15:44.200 align:middle line:84% the elders turn to a serious and frightening subject, the moon, 00:15:44.200 --> 00:15:48.010 align:middle line:84% which is always spoken of in whispers. 00:15:48.010 --> 00:15:53.350 align:middle line:84% See how it glows and whips across the sky, always changing 00:15:53.350 --> 00:15:56.740 align:middle line:90% its shape, one says. 00:15:56.740 --> 00:15:59.620 align:middle line:84% And another says, feel how it pulls 00:15:59.620 --> 00:16:03.290 align:middle line:90% at us urging us to follow. 00:16:03.290 --> 00:16:08.000 align:middle line:84% And a third whispers, it is a stone gone mad. 00:16:08.000 --> 00:16:11.493 align:middle line:90% [WIND BLOWING] 00:16:11.493 --> 00:16:32.950 align:middle line:90% 00:16:32.950 --> 00:16:35.680 align:middle line:84% In the desert it is not the sun we 00:16:35.680 --> 00:16:38.950 align:middle line:90% get to know best, but the moon. 00:16:38.950 --> 00:16:41.680 align:middle line:84% We learn about it when we are very young 00:16:41.680 --> 00:16:45.160 align:middle line:90% and not a moment too soon. 00:16:45.160 --> 00:16:48.100 align:middle line:84% If you come here to stay, do not worry 00:16:48.100 --> 00:16:50.410 align:middle line:90% about what will happen to you. 00:16:50.410 --> 00:16:52.390 align:middle line:90% The moon will take care of you. 00:16:52.390 --> 00:16:57.410 align:middle line:84% You will obey it and the worst will happen. 00:16:57.410 --> 00:17:02.040 align:middle line:84% It is no use asking the moon philosophical questions. 00:17:02.040 --> 00:17:06.300 align:middle line:84% When it tells us anything, it tells us everything. 00:17:06.300 --> 00:17:10.700 align:middle line:84% Always more than we wanted to know. 00:17:10.700 --> 00:17:13.430 align:middle line:84% The moon commands the desert cold, 00:17:13.430 --> 00:17:19.089 align:middle line:84% a word so harsh it splits the tongue of the true aloe. 00:17:19.089 --> 00:17:21.640 align:middle line:84% The moon pulls stones to the surface 00:17:21.640 --> 00:17:25.270 align:middle line:84% and directs the ghosts of dry rivers in their paths 00:17:25.270 --> 00:17:27.810 align:middle line:90% toward the sea. 00:17:27.810 --> 00:17:31.770 align:middle line:84% The moon rules the wind, which will fall in love with anyone 00:17:31.770 --> 00:17:35.730 align:middle line:84% and run away, but the moon brings it back each time 00:17:35.730 --> 00:17:39.020 align:middle line:90% without recriminations. 00:17:39.020 --> 00:17:42.890 align:middle line:84% At night, my shadow follows me through the desert 00:17:42.890 --> 00:17:47.900 align:middle line:84% like a faithful snake, but it is not faithful to me. 00:17:47.900 --> 00:17:51.990 align:middle line:90% It is faithful to the moon. 00:17:51.990 --> 00:17:55.920 align:middle line:84% Other moons can be seen in other places, 00:17:55.920 --> 00:18:00.090 align:middle line:84% but the desert moon lives here and it lives alone. 00:18:00.090 --> 00:18:05.520 align:middle line:84% Its own friend, its own company, its own comfort in the dark. 00:18:05.520 --> 00:18:15.830 align:middle line:90% 00:18:15.830 --> 00:18:19.040 align:middle line:84% When I wake in the night troubled and thinking 00:18:19.040 --> 00:18:24.900 align:middle line:84% I heard the cry of a bird, I go to the window and look out. 00:18:24.900 --> 00:18:30.600 align:middle line:84% Then I realize it was the cry of the moon. 00:18:30.600 --> 00:18:33.750 align:middle line:84% Years ago I thought I heard the voice of mountains 00:18:33.750 --> 00:18:37.100 align:middle line:90% which spoke only at night. 00:18:37.100 --> 00:18:41.960 align:middle line:84% Since then I have listened many times, and I was mistaken. 00:18:41.960 --> 00:18:47.660 align:middle line:84% It was the echo of the voice of the moon. 00:18:47.660 --> 00:18:50.990 align:middle line:84% When I am unhappy, the moon reminds me 00:18:50.990 --> 00:18:53.960 align:middle line:90% that all things change. 00:18:53.960 --> 00:18:56.930 align:middle line:84% When I am happy, it does the same thing. 00:18:56.930 --> 00:18:59.670 align:middle line:90% 00:18:59.670 --> 00:19:03.490 align:middle line:84% I can believe that men have walked on the moon. 00:19:03.490 --> 00:19:06.380 align:middle line:90% Men would do a thing like that. 00:19:06.380 --> 00:19:10.060 align:middle line:84% But when I am told the moon is a huge round stone, 00:19:10.060 --> 00:19:14.530 align:middle line:84% which does not change its shape, and has no light of its own, 00:19:14.530 --> 00:19:17.200 align:middle line:90% I cannot believe it. 00:19:17.200 --> 00:19:21.280 align:middle line:84% I have heard the voice of the moon. 00:19:21.280 --> 00:19:25.120 align:middle line:84% I have become confused and do not know who I am, 00:19:25.120 --> 00:19:28.580 align:middle line:84% I listen to the voice of the moon. 00:19:28.580 --> 00:19:34.210 align:middle line:84% The moon knows who everyone is and forgives all of us. 00:19:34.210 --> 00:19:37.240 align:middle line:84% When the moon is new it begins at the beginning 00:19:37.240 --> 00:19:41.680 align:middle line:84% and tells the same story straight through to the end. 00:19:41.680 --> 00:19:46.740 align:middle line:84% It is a long story, but we listen and believe. 00:19:46.740 --> 00:19:51.030 align:middle line:84% Who can doubt the voice of the moon? 00:19:51.030 --> 00:19:54.090 align:middle line:84% It is important to learn the habits of the moon, 00:19:54.090 --> 00:19:58.800 align:middle line:84% otherwise one might wait all night and it would not appear. 00:19:58.800 --> 00:20:01.200 align:middle line:84% And when the sun rose triumphant, 00:20:01.200 --> 00:20:05.070 align:middle line:84% one might despair believing the moon had been destroyed 00:20:05.070 --> 00:20:06.195 align:middle line:90% and would never return. 00:20:06.195 --> 00:20:08.710 align:middle line:90% 00:20:08.710 --> 00:20:10.750 align:middle line:90% The sun is like fire. 00:20:10.750 --> 00:20:15.100 align:middle line:84% It takes what it wants and pays no attention to anyone, 00:20:15.100 --> 00:20:17.320 align:middle line:90% but the moon knows each of us. 00:20:17.320 --> 00:20:23.500 align:middle line:84% It looks into our eyes and remembers all our names. 00:20:23.500 --> 00:20:26.410 align:middle line:84% When we watch the sun go down, we 00:20:26.410 --> 00:20:29.610 align:middle line:90% are impressed with its glory. 00:20:29.610 --> 00:20:35.800 align:middle line:84% When we watch the moon go down, we want to go with it. 00:20:35.800 --> 00:20:39.190 align:middle line:84% The sea, the wind, and the owl try 00:20:39.190 --> 00:20:44.180 align:middle line:84% to imitate the voice of the moon, but none succeed. 00:20:44.180 --> 00:20:47.930 align:middle line:84% Beethoven and Debussy tried to write its song, 00:20:47.930 --> 00:20:51.260 align:middle line:84% but compared with the voice of the moon, one of them 00:20:51.260 --> 00:20:54.320 align:middle line:84% created the sound of screen doors slamming 00:20:54.320 --> 00:20:59.970 align:middle line:84% and the other the sound of a pork chop being fried. 00:20:59.970 --> 00:21:02.790 align:middle line:84% When the moon rises in the afternoon 00:21:02.790 --> 00:21:08.310 align:middle line:84% and sets too early to be of any use, I remember how old I am 00:21:08.310 --> 00:21:13.960 align:middle line:84% and that I no longer have the option of dying young. 00:21:13.960 --> 00:21:17.560 align:middle line:84% When I sleep and moonlight comes through the window 00:21:17.560 --> 00:21:20.245 align:middle line:84% and touches me, I become a dream. 00:21:20.245 --> 00:21:22.860 align:middle line:90% 00:21:22.860 --> 00:21:26.940 align:middle line:84% No man turns into a wolf when the moon is full, 00:21:26.940 --> 00:21:29.640 align:middle line:84% but wolves howl when the moon is full 00:21:29.640 --> 00:21:31.050 align:middle line:90% because they hear its voice. 00:21:31.050 --> 00:21:33.560 align:middle line:90% 00:21:33.560 --> 00:21:36.470 align:middle line:90% Some think the moon is silent. 00:21:36.470 --> 00:21:38.638 align:middle line:90% They are blind. 00:21:38.638 --> 00:21:42.131 align:middle line:90% [COYOTES HOWLING] 00:21:42.131 --> 00:21:45.495 align:middle line:90% 00:21:45.495 --> 00:21:47.620 align:middle line:84% [MUSIC - HANK WILLIAMS SR - "YOUR CHEATIN' HEART"] 00:21:47.620 --> 00:21:54.610 align:middle line:84% Your cheating heart will make you weep. 00:21:54.610 --> 00:22:02.090 align:middle line:84% You'll cry and cry and try to sleep. 00:22:02.090 --> 00:22:09.620 align:middle line:84% But sleep won't come the whole night through. 00:22:09.620 --> 00:22:17.130 align:middle line:84% Your cheating heart will tell on you. 00:22:17.130 --> 00:22:24.910 align:middle line:84% When tears come down like falling rain 00:22:24.910 --> 00:22:32.777 align:middle line:84% you'll toss around then call my name. 00:22:32.777 --> 00:22:37.160 align:middle line:84% You'll walk the floor the way I do. 00:22:37.160 --> 00:22:39.950 align:middle line:90% 00:22:39.950 --> 00:22:45.438 align:middle line:84% Your cheating heart will tell on you. 00:22:45.438 --> 00:22:49.710 align:middle line:90% 00:22:49.710 --> 00:22:52.620 align:middle line:84% If you live where I come from and you 00:22:52.620 --> 00:22:57.780 align:middle line:84% want to be rich and beautiful, first get rich, 00:22:57.780 --> 00:23:01.560 align:middle line:84% then we'll tell you you're beautiful. 00:23:01.560 --> 00:23:03.600 align:middle line:90% Hell, settle for that. 00:23:03.600 --> 00:23:04.980 align:middle line:90% You can't have everything. 00:23:04.980 --> 00:23:07.770 align:middle line:90% 00:23:07.770 --> 00:23:10.470 align:middle line:84% Walk down Main Street at midnight 00:23:10.470 --> 00:23:16.020 align:middle line:84% when the only place that's open are two bars in the same block, 00:23:16.020 --> 00:23:21.210 align:middle line:84% turn the corner, and walk past the homes of the good people 00:23:21.210 --> 00:23:23.580 align:middle line:90% of Santo Tomas. 00:23:23.580 --> 00:23:28.980 align:middle line:84% Everybody will be doing one of three things rather well, 00:23:28.980 --> 00:23:32.820 align:middle line:84% sleeping, drinking, or the thing we all 00:23:32.820 --> 00:23:36.510 align:middle line:84% think we would do better with somebody else's husband 00:23:36.510 --> 00:23:38.160 align:middle line:90% or wife. 00:23:38.160 --> 00:23:42.630 align:middle line:84% And maybe an angel, like a huge white moth, 00:23:42.630 --> 00:23:44.700 align:middle line:84% will be hovering over each of us. 00:23:44.700 --> 00:23:47.940 align:middle line:90% 00:23:47.940 --> 00:23:52.140 align:middle line:84% Years ago, some desperate farmer took this land away 00:23:52.140 --> 00:23:58.020 align:middle line:84% from the desert and every summer the desert wants it back. 00:23:58.020 --> 00:24:03.660 align:middle line:84% In the heat, everything stops moving, even the dogs. 00:24:03.660 --> 00:24:08.010 align:middle line:84% All night cicadas drill our teeth, water gets scarce, 00:24:08.010 --> 00:24:10.860 align:middle line:84% and what little there is warm and bitter, 00:24:10.860 --> 00:24:13.440 align:middle line:84% but we learn to drink our liquor straight. 00:24:13.440 --> 00:24:16.740 align:middle line:90% 00:24:16.740 --> 00:24:21.490 align:middle line:84% New people come here sometimes, but don't stay long. 00:24:21.490 --> 00:24:24.070 align:middle line:84% I'd like to know what attracts them. 00:24:24.070 --> 00:24:27.730 align:middle line:84% Maybe the need to suffer, we all have it, 00:24:27.730 --> 00:24:33.040 align:middle line:84% like a bird pecking away inside us as if inside an egg. 00:24:33.040 --> 00:24:36.200 align:middle line:84% Some people think that if you suffer enough, 00:24:36.200 --> 00:24:39.970 align:middle line:84% you'll get to be better, even noble. 00:24:39.970 --> 00:24:43.810 align:middle line:84% But I've lived here 40 years, and I get meaner every day. 00:24:43.810 --> 00:24:46.780 align:middle line:90% 00:24:46.780 --> 00:24:51.130 align:middle line:84% I have nothing to recommend me except longevity, 00:24:51.130 --> 00:24:55.030 align:middle line:90% and, hell, what good is that? 00:24:55.030 --> 00:24:58.330 align:middle line:84% Show me an old man who doesn't envy every stud 00:24:58.330 --> 00:25:02.350 align:middle line:84% he sees, and I'll show you a body with the undertaker's 00:25:02.350 --> 00:25:04.450 align:middle line:90% fingerprints all over it. 00:25:04.450 --> 00:25:08.050 align:middle line:90% 00:25:08.050 --> 00:25:11.080 align:middle line:84% Because of the way they dress, it's 00:25:11.080 --> 00:25:16.150 align:middle line:84% getting hard to tell the whores from the female schoolteachers, 00:25:16.150 --> 00:25:18.520 align:middle line:84% which probably means that whoring 00:25:18.520 --> 00:25:23.080 align:middle line:84% isn't nearly as well-paid of profession as it used to be. 00:25:23.080 --> 00:25:26.410 align:middle line:84% What, with all the enthusiastic amateurs around here. 00:25:26.410 --> 00:25:28.970 align:middle line:90% 00:25:28.970 --> 00:25:32.450 align:middle line:84% I used to think this bar was the center of the community, 00:25:32.450 --> 00:25:35.150 align:middle line:84% and if I sat here long enough, I'd 00:25:35.150 --> 00:25:39.890 align:middle line:84% learn everything worth knowing about the good people of Santo 00:25:39.890 --> 00:25:41.510 align:middle line:90% Tomas. 00:25:41.510 --> 00:25:45.530 align:middle line:84% But this afternoon, I went to the funeral of the richest man 00:25:45.530 --> 00:25:49.670 align:middle line:84% in town and watched his two widows fight 00:25:49.670 --> 00:25:54.050 align:middle line:84% over which of them follow his coffin to the grave. 00:25:54.050 --> 00:25:59.120 align:middle line:84% Now, I realized, that all significant social events still 00:25:59.120 --> 00:26:02.730 align:middle line:90% take place in church. 00:26:02.730 --> 00:26:05.700 align:middle line:84% The Earth is moving several ways at once, 00:26:05.700 --> 00:26:09.810 align:middle line:84% but sometimes I wonder if we're going with it. 00:26:09.810 --> 00:26:13.740 align:middle line:84% And when the drive-in movie shuts down for the night, 00:26:13.740 --> 00:26:16.560 align:middle line:84% the stars remain over Santo Tomas 00:26:16.560 --> 00:26:19.980 align:middle line:84% like holes in the darkness through which we 00:26:19.980 --> 00:26:24.120 align:middle line:90% see a great, enormous light. 00:26:24.120 --> 00:26:27.070 align:middle line:84% I don't think death will be much use to us, 00:26:27.070 --> 00:26:30.480 align:middle line:84% since we've grown accustomed to using pain for our purposes 00:26:30.480 --> 00:26:33.690 align:middle line:90% and even love when you have to. 00:26:33.690 --> 00:26:37.200 align:middle line:84% I think death will arrive when we have nothing 00:26:37.200 --> 00:26:41.970 align:middle line:84% left to use to get what we want or when we no longer want 00:26:41.970 --> 00:26:46.290 align:middle line:90% anything, whichever comes first. 00:26:46.290 --> 00:26:48.750 align:middle line:90% I've learned to wait. 00:26:48.750 --> 00:26:53.010 align:middle line:84% Nothing we want is ever worth what we go through to get it, 00:26:53.010 --> 00:26:57.090 align:middle line:84% and the difference between what little we have to offer 00:26:57.090 --> 00:27:01.380 align:middle line:84% and how much we're asked to pay is life, a kind 00:27:01.380 --> 00:27:04.380 align:middle line:90% of debt we always owe somebody. 00:27:04.380 --> 00:27:08.700 align:middle line:90% I'm in no hurry to pay it. 00:27:08.700 --> 00:27:12.720 align:middle line:84% If you can't make it newer milking the canaries, 00:27:12.720 --> 00:27:17.070 align:middle line:84% you can leave your wedding cake and go to Cleveland, 00:27:17.070 --> 00:27:20.190 align:middle line:90% Des Moines, or Little Rock. 00:27:20.190 --> 00:27:24.190 align:middle line:84% If you can't make it there because of the humidity, 00:27:24.190 --> 00:27:28.990 align:middle line:84% you can go to Tucson to drink the air and live in the sun. 00:27:28.990 --> 00:27:33.100 align:middle line:84% If you can't make it in Tucson because of the heat, 00:27:33.100 --> 00:27:37.000 align:middle line:84% you can go to California and wear dark glasses. 00:27:37.000 --> 00:27:41.280 align:middle line:84% If you can't make it to California, you can go to hell. 00:27:41.280 --> 00:27:45.647 align:middle line:84% It isn't far, the border runs right through Los Angeles. 00:27:45.647 --> 00:27:47.730 align:middle line:84% [MUSIC - HANK WILLIAMS SR - "MIND YOUR BUSINESS"] 00:27:47.730 --> 00:27:51.805 align:middle line:84% Well, if you mind your business then you won't be minding mine. 00:27:51.805 --> 00:28:14.900 align:middle line:90% 00:28:14.900 --> 00:28:18.560 align:middle line:84% I got a little gal that wears her hair up high, 00:28:18.560 --> 00:28:21.440 align:middle line:84% the boys all whistle when she walked by. 00:28:21.440 --> 00:28:25.190 align:middle line:84% Why don't you mind your own business? 00:28:25.190 --> 00:28:28.235 align:middle line:90% Mind your own business. 00:28:28.235 --> 00:28:30.652 align:middle line:84% Well, if you mind your business, then you sure 00:28:30.652 --> 00:28:31.569 align:middle line:90% won't be minding mine. 00:28:31.569 --> 00:28:34.350 align:middle line:90% [WIND BLOWING] 00:28:34.350 --> 00:28:52.140 align:middle line:90% 00:28:52.140 --> 00:28:56.220 align:middle line:84% On December nights when the rain we needed months ago 00:28:56.220 --> 00:28:59.400 align:middle line:84% is still far off and the wind gropes 00:28:59.400 --> 00:29:04.040 align:middle line:84% through the desert in search of any tree to hold it, 00:29:04.040 --> 00:29:06.830 align:middle line:84% those who live here all year round 00:29:06.830 --> 00:29:10.580 align:middle line:84% listen to the irresistible voice of loneliness 00:29:10.580 --> 00:29:14.800 align:middle line:90% and want only to be left alone. 00:29:14.800 --> 00:29:17.830 align:middle line:84% Local knowledge is to live in a place 00:29:17.830 --> 00:29:22.460 align:middle line:84% and know the place however barren. 00:29:22.460 --> 00:29:26.420 align:middle line:84% Some kinds of damage provide their own defense, 00:29:26.420 --> 00:29:31.430 align:middle line:84% and we who stay in the ruins are secure against enemies 00:29:31.430 --> 00:29:33.980 align:middle line:90% and friends. 00:29:33.980 --> 00:29:36.770 align:middle line:84% If you should see one of us in the distance 00:29:36.770 --> 00:29:42.140 align:middle line:84% as your caravan passes, and if he is ragged and gesturing, 00:29:42.140 --> 00:29:44.440 align:middle line:90% do not be mistaken. 00:29:44.440 --> 00:29:47.560 align:middle line:90% He is not gesturing for rescue. 00:29:47.560 --> 00:29:50.830 align:middle line:90% He is shouting go away. 00:29:50.830 --> 00:29:54.185 align:middle line:90% 00:29:54.185 --> 00:29:57.538 align:middle line:90% [NATIVE AMERICAN SINGING] 00:29:57.538 --> 00:30:21.760 align:middle line:90% 00:30:21.760 --> 00:30:25.420 align:middle line:90% Stars, you inquisitive animals? 00:30:25.420 --> 00:30:28.240 align:middle line:84% Shall I tell you the same things again? 00:30:28.240 --> 00:30:30.400 align:middle line:84% Shall I tell you all the places I 00:30:30.400 --> 00:30:33.040 align:middle line:90% went when I had nowhere to go? 00:30:33.040 --> 00:30:36.240 align:middle line:90% Shall I draw you a map? 00:30:36.240 --> 00:30:40.080 align:middle line:84% While it is still night with morning around the edges, 00:30:40.080 --> 00:30:44.580 align:middle line:84% I will take the face of dawn in my hands and say it. 00:30:44.580 --> 00:30:48.990 align:middle line:84% Surely if I can tell anyone, I can tell her 00:30:48.990 --> 00:30:52.410 align:middle line:84% that I have found the gods and discovered 00:30:52.410 --> 00:30:55.170 align:middle line:90% I am not one of them. 00:30:55.170 --> 00:30:57.520 align:middle line:84% If I must have faith in something, 00:30:57.520 --> 00:30:59.970 align:middle line:84% it might as well be the desert as the river, 00:30:59.970 --> 00:31:02.760 align:middle line:84% it might as well be today as tomorrow, 00:31:02.760 --> 00:31:04.800 align:middle line:90% my fingers as my teeth. 00:31:04.800 --> 00:31:09.260 align:middle line:90% It might as well be despair. 00:31:09.260 --> 00:31:13.860 align:middle line:84% All I can do for the moth is light the candle. 00:31:13.860 --> 00:31:17.070 align:middle line:84% All I can do for the forgotten is forget. 00:31:17.070 --> 00:31:20.166 align:middle line:90% 00:31:20.166 --> 00:31:22.920 align:middle line:90% [NATIVE AMERICAN SINGING] 00:31:22.920 --> 00:31:35.110 align:middle line:90% 00:31:35.110 --> 00:31:38.570 align:middle line:84% Where one mountain sits on top of another, 00:31:38.570 --> 00:31:45.330 align:middle line:84% we turn the basket upside down and sing a holy song. 00:31:45.330 --> 00:31:47.430 align:middle line:90% We are in great peace. 00:31:47.430 --> 00:31:51.000 align:middle line:90% We are in great peace. 00:31:51.000 --> 00:31:55.380 align:middle line:84% It is not true, but it will confuse our enemies 00:31:55.380 --> 00:31:58.575 align:middle line:84% and none can sing the dead back again. 00:31:58.575 --> 00:32:01.290 align:middle line:90% 00:32:01.290 --> 00:32:04.140 align:middle line:84% The little bat sits in the last row 00:32:04.140 --> 00:32:07.040 align:middle line:90% with his coat over his head. 00:32:07.040 --> 00:32:10.940 align:middle line:84% Take our pain and put it into the fire. 00:32:10.940 --> 00:32:12.920 align:middle line:90% We are in great peace. 00:32:12.920 --> 00:32:16.630 align:middle line:90% We are in great peace. 00:32:16.630 --> 00:32:21.160 align:middle line:84% When you ask for something, you must give something in return, 00:32:21.160 --> 00:32:27.178 align:middle line:84% but none can sing the dead back again. 00:32:27.178 --> 00:32:31.066 align:middle line:84% [NATIVE AMERICAN RATTLE PLAYING AND SINGING] 00:32:31.066 --> 00:32:50.300 align:middle line:90% 00:32:50.300 --> 00:32:55.250 align:middle line:84% In the darkness of the first world, beneath this world, 00:32:55.250 --> 00:32:58.370 align:middle line:84% the gray legs of the crow walk around 00:32:58.370 --> 00:33:03.630 align:middle line:84% in search of a body saying, at the time when things began, 00:33:03.630 --> 00:33:05.380 align:middle line:90% we knew all about it. 00:33:05.380 --> 00:33:08.910 align:middle line:84% We knew about the mountain spirit, the black sky, 00:33:08.910 --> 00:33:10.080 align:middle line:90% the shining stone. 00:33:10.080 --> 00:33:13.210 align:middle line:90% We knew all about it. 00:33:13.210 --> 00:33:15.910 align:middle line:84% In the silence of the second world, 00:33:15.910 --> 00:33:19.210 align:middle line:84% beneath this world, yellow coyotes run 00:33:19.210 --> 00:33:23.700 align:middle line:84% in circles in search of their voices, wanting to say, 00:33:23.700 --> 00:33:27.430 align:middle line:84% at the time when things began, we knew all about it. 00:33:27.430 --> 00:33:31.480 align:middle line:84% We knew about the water spirit, the corn pollen, the talking 00:33:31.480 --> 00:33:31.980 align:middle line:90% god. 00:33:31.980 --> 00:33:35.080 align:middle line:90% We knew all about it. 00:33:35.080 --> 00:33:39.430 align:middle line:84% In the smoke of the third world, beneath this world, 00:33:39.430 --> 00:33:42.940 align:middle line:84% the souls of dead men carry offerings 00:33:42.940 --> 00:33:48.810 align:middle line:84% in search of fire saying, at the time when things began, 00:33:48.810 --> 00:33:50.770 align:middle line:90% we knew all about it. 00:33:50.770 --> 00:33:54.180 align:middle line:84% We knew about all the soft goods, the hard goods, 00:33:54.180 --> 00:33:55.170 align:middle line:90% the sacred words. 00:33:55.170 --> 00:33:58.170 align:middle line:90% We knew all about it. 00:33:58.170 --> 00:34:03.570 align:middle line:84% There is no fourth world beneath this world, only the fire, 00:34:03.570 --> 00:34:09.250 align:middle line:84% who knows nothing, needs nothing, wants nothing, and is 00:34:09.250 --> 00:34:09.750 align:middle line:90% content. 00:34:09.750 --> 00:34:12.455 align:middle line:90% 00:34:12.455 --> 00:34:15.790 align:middle line:84% [NATIVE AMERICAN BELLS PLAYING AND SINGING] 00:34:15.790 --> 00:34:27.772 align:middle line:90% 00:34:27.772 --> 00:34:32.030 align:middle line:84% Moon says its name as a sign in the sky. 00:34:32.030 --> 00:34:35.330 align:middle line:84% Wind says its name, which runs along 00:34:35.330 --> 00:34:38.420 align:middle line:90% behind it, trying to catch up. 00:34:38.420 --> 00:34:44.510 align:middle line:84% Road says its name as a casual promise and then moves on. 00:34:44.510 --> 00:34:47.750 align:middle line:84% Mountain says its name in two languages, 00:34:47.750 --> 00:34:51.139 align:middle line:90% both words are almost the same. 00:34:51.139 --> 00:34:54.739 align:middle line:84% Bat says its name and listens for the echo 00:34:54.739 --> 00:34:58.110 align:middle line:90% which will guide it. 00:34:58.110 --> 00:35:01.260 align:middle line:84% Coyote says its name again and again 00:35:01.260 --> 00:35:05.280 align:middle line:84% to the moon, which pays no attention. 00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:08.160 align:middle line:84% Palo verde says its name as a snare 00:35:08.160 --> 00:35:12.180 align:middle line:84% for the wind's name, which runs along blindly, trying 00:35:12.180 --> 00:35:14.520 align:middle line:90% to catch up. 00:35:14.520 --> 00:35:17.400 align:middle line:84% Arroyo says its name to the coyote, 00:35:17.400 --> 00:35:21.270 align:middle line:90% who translates it as home. 00:35:21.270 --> 00:35:24.300 align:middle line:84% Place between two mountains says its name 00:35:24.300 --> 00:35:30.240 align:middle line:84% to the stars, who say their names not quite in unison. 00:35:30.240 --> 00:35:33.930 align:middle line:84% Owl says its name as a challenge to intruders 00:35:33.930 --> 00:35:39.150 align:middle line:84% who do not know the password is to repeat the name. 00:35:39.150 --> 00:35:42.090 align:middle line:84% Darkness says its name, which breaks 00:35:42.090 --> 00:35:48.060 align:middle line:84% into small pieces and hides from the moon in the arroyo. 00:35:48.060 --> 00:35:51.900 align:middle line:90% Silence says its name softly. 00:35:51.900 --> 00:35:56.650 align:middle line:84% The name of the place where it was born and lived until it 00:35:56.650 --> 00:35:57.150 align:middle line:90% died. 00:35:57.150 --> 00:36:03.390 align:middle line:90% 00:36:03.390 --> 00:36:07.950 align:middle line:84% You have so much to give, they said, so I gave it. 00:36:07.950 --> 00:36:10.440 align:middle line:90% Now it is gone. 00:36:10.440 --> 00:36:14.010 align:middle line:84% I stand with my back to a cliff, where stones 00:36:14.010 --> 00:36:16.020 align:middle line:90% lean over looking down at me. 00:36:16.020 --> 00:36:17.410 align:middle line:90% They are smooth. 00:36:17.410 --> 00:36:23.060 align:middle line:84% They have dragged themselves a long way to get here. 00:36:23.060 --> 00:36:26.870 align:middle line:84% Years ago, I wrote love letters to distant water 00:36:26.870 --> 00:36:32.120 align:middle line:84% and wore the desire to travel like a hair shirt. 00:36:32.120 --> 00:36:36.320 align:middle line:84% But that is over, and regret was never a friend of mine, 00:36:36.320 --> 00:36:40.730 align:middle line:84% so I let him go in search of the others who departed 00:36:40.730 --> 00:36:46.880 align:middle line:84% wearing accidental lives, mocking me, calling me, he 00:36:46.880 --> 00:36:49.100 align:middle line:90% who remains. 00:36:49.100 --> 00:36:53.630 align:middle line:84% And I remain in the desert, caught in the ropes of myself 00:36:53.630 --> 00:36:54.980 align:middle line:90% like rosaries. 00:36:54.980 --> 00:37:01.820 align:middle line:84% Staying here with penitent stars whose confessions frighten me. 00:37:01.820 --> 00:37:05.720 align:middle line:84% There is no explanation for lights which move about 00:37:05.720 --> 00:37:08.270 align:middle line:84% inside the mountains, and coyotes 00:37:08.270 --> 00:37:12.740 align:middle line:84% are all that is left of a race we once conquered. 00:37:12.740 --> 00:37:18.680 align:middle line:84% At night I hear them worshipping gods with unspeakable names. 00:37:18.680 --> 00:37:21.320 align:middle line:84% I have learned to make use of pain. 00:37:21.320 --> 00:37:24.380 align:middle line:84% He never fails to take me into his confidence, 00:37:24.380 --> 00:37:27.620 align:middle line:84% telling me more than I wanted to know, 00:37:27.620 --> 00:37:30.080 align:middle line:84% and when morning arrives, bringing 00:37:30.080 --> 00:37:32.270 align:middle line:90% whatever it can to help. 00:37:32.270 --> 00:37:38.030 align:middle line:84% I ready myself for the impetuous revival of sand. 00:37:38.030 --> 00:37:41.120 align:middle line:84% If I were to leave this desert, who 00:37:41.120 --> 00:37:43.880 align:middle line:90% would cherish transparent light? 00:37:43.880 --> 00:37:46.760 align:middle line:90% Who would nurse broken stones? 00:37:46.760 --> 00:37:49.456 align:middle line:90% Who would mother the cold? 00:37:49.456 --> 00:37:52.515 align:middle line:84% [NATIVE AMERICAN BELLS PLAYING AND SINGING] 00:37:52.515 --> 00:37:57.680 align:middle line:90% 00:37:57.680 --> 00:38:00.950 align:middle line:84% Some years the birds fly south for the winter 00:38:00.950 --> 00:38:03.650 align:middle line:90% and there isn't any. 00:38:03.650 --> 00:38:07.250 align:middle line:84% Trees beckon to them, but they fly into the desert 00:38:07.250 --> 00:38:10.580 align:middle line:90% which has had no autumn rain. 00:38:10.580 --> 00:38:13.730 align:middle line:90% It is winter in a dry season. 00:38:13.730 --> 00:38:18.080 align:middle line:84% The coyotes are warming up for a night of unearthly music, 00:38:18.080 --> 00:38:23.880 align:middle line:84% and the moon hangs by its horns above the Santa Ritas. 00:38:23.880 --> 00:38:28.860 align:middle line:84% I am trying to say something about my life in a dry season, 00:38:28.860 --> 00:38:31.740 align:middle line:84% while thirsty birds sleep with their heads 00:38:31.740 --> 00:38:37.490 align:middle line:84% under their wings and coyotes chant vanity, vanity, vanity. 00:38:37.490 --> 00:38:40.630 align:middle line:90% 00:38:40.630 --> 00:38:45.820 align:middle line:84% When a man loves the desert, he loves it as he loves a woman. 00:38:45.820 --> 00:38:49.210 align:middle line:84% At first in spite of her imperfections, 00:38:49.210 --> 00:38:51.520 align:middle line:90% and later because of them. 00:38:51.520 --> 00:38:54.400 align:middle line:90% 00:38:54.400 --> 00:38:58.450 align:middle line:84% All day I lifted stones and fitted them into a wall, 00:38:58.450 --> 00:39:02.140 align:middle line:84% carrying each one carefully, walking on my heels 00:39:02.140 --> 00:39:05.420 align:middle line:90% like a woman with child. 00:39:05.420 --> 00:39:08.360 align:middle line:84% The wall will stand, perhaps five years 00:39:08.360 --> 00:39:11.270 align:middle line:90% before the stones leave me. 00:39:11.270 --> 00:39:12.980 align:middle line:84% When they have made their journeys 00:39:12.980 --> 00:39:15.950 align:middle line:84% down slopes and into deep arroyos, 00:39:15.950 --> 00:39:20.030 align:middle line:84% I will slip out and find them scarred and chipped 00:39:20.030 --> 00:39:24.380 align:middle line:84% in the moonlight, and bring them home. 00:39:24.380 --> 00:39:27.320 align:middle line:84% There is a bird who follows me, curious 00:39:27.320 --> 00:39:29.240 align:middle line:90% to know what I am doing. 00:39:29.240 --> 00:39:33.080 align:middle line:84% And why should he fear me when he kills rattlesnakes 00:39:33.080 --> 00:39:35.540 align:middle line:90% and outruns coyotes? 00:39:35.540 --> 00:39:37.610 align:middle line:84% There is a spider who struggles so 00:39:37.610 --> 00:39:41.900 align:middle line:84% hard to escape the embrace of his huge love sick mate 00:39:41.900 --> 00:39:45.110 align:middle line:90% that he dies of exhaustion. 00:39:45.110 --> 00:39:50.000 align:middle line:84% There is a toad who digs his way six feet up toward desert rain, 00:39:50.000 --> 00:39:55.190 align:middle line:84% and when he arrives, bleats like a lamb. 00:39:55.190 --> 00:39:58.860 align:middle line:84% I have chosen this place and given it a name. 00:39:58.860 --> 00:40:01.640 align:middle line:90% It is called my place. 00:40:01.640 --> 00:40:04.610 align:middle line:84% A place without subtlety, where morning light is 00:40:04.610 --> 00:40:07.700 align:middle line:84% unfiltered by leaves and the wind blows 00:40:07.700 --> 00:40:10.310 align:middle line:90% unhampered by leaves. 00:40:10.310 --> 00:40:14.180 align:middle line:84% Where sunlight hurls itself down as if each day would 00:40:14.180 --> 00:40:16.520 align:middle line:90% be followed by two nights. 00:40:16.520 --> 00:40:19.310 align:middle line:84% Sunlight, which pierces the closed 00:40:19.310 --> 00:40:23.180 align:middle line:90% eyelid and impales the eye. 00:40:23.180 --> 00:40:27.350 align:middle line:84% And after a day heavy with heat in which to be empty 00:40:27.350 --> 00:40:32.390 align:middle line:84% handed is burdened enough, the sudden vacuum of dry cold. 00:40:32.390 --> 00:40:35.590 align:middle line:90% 00:40:35.590 --> 00:40:38.530 align:middle line:84% Now, while the moon pulls darkness 00:40:38.530 --> 00:40:41.650 align:middle line:84% toward a place where somebody must need it 00:40:41.650 --> 00:40:46.270 align:middle line:84% more than I do, and new stones are struggling slowly 00:40:46.270 --> 00:40:50.320 align:middle line:84% to the surface, I wait with the chollas, who 00:40:50.320 --> 00:40:55.030 align:middle line:84% stand under the shelter of their dangerous long blonde hair 00:40:55.030 --> 00:40:58.660 align:middle line:90% and watch for rain. 00:40:58.660 --> 00:41:01.240 align:middle line:84% I, who was promised little by men, 00:41:01.240 --> 00:41:04.870 align:middle line:84% have waited for it, gone without in order to have it, 00:41:04.870 --> 00:41:08.770 align:middle line:84% and, finally, it arrives as a blessing. 00:41:08.770 --> 00:41:13.480 align:middle line:84% Place I have chosen, where I will not pay tribute to those 00:41:13.480 --> 00:41:15.940 align:middle line:90% from whom I learned the most. 00:41:15.940 --> 00:41:18.940 align:middle line:84% If they want it, they must steal it from me 00:41:18.940 --> 00:41:21.460 align:middle line:84% as I stole their knowledge from them. 00:41:21.460 --> 00:41:26.350 align:middle line:84% Place I have chosen, where exile is home. 00:41:26.350 --> 00:41:31.360 align:middle line:84% Thicken my roots and extend them toward secret compartments 00:41:31.360 --> 00:41:34.540 align:middle line:84% of dark water, which will nurture me, 00:41:34.540 --> 00:41:38.320 align:middle line:84% that I might live a life without explanation 00:41:38.320 --> 00:41:41.911 align:middle line:90% in all the books of men. 00:41:41.911 --> 00:41:45.380 align:middle line:84% [NATIVE AMERICAN BELLS PLAYING AND SINGING] 00:41:45.380 --> 00:42:09.650 align:middle line:90% 00:42:09.650 --> 00:42:13.610 align:middle line:84% This is the land of gods in exile. 00:42:13.610 --> 00:42:17.210 align:middle line:84% They are fragile and without pride. 00:42:17.210 --> 00:42:20.660 align:middle line:90% They require no worshippers. 00:42:20.660 --> 00:42:23.810 align:middle line:84% We come down a white road in the moonlight, 00:42:23.810 --> 00:42:26.870 align:middle line:84% dragging our feet like innocence, 00:42:26.870 --> 00:42:31.160 align:middle line:84% to find the guilty already arrived and in possession 00:42:31.160 --> 00:42:33.800 align:middle line:90% of everything. 00:42:33.800 --> 00:42:36.830 align:middle line:84% We see the stars as they were years ago, 00:42:36.830 --> 00:42:39.780 align:middle line:90% but for us, it is the future. 00:42:39.780 --> 00:42:43.080 align:middle line:90% They warn us too late. 00:42:43.080 --> 00:42:44.030 align:middle line:90% We are here. 00:42:44.030 --> 00:42:45.770 align:middle line:90% We cannot turn back. 00:42:45.770 --> 00:42:49.790 align:middle line:84% Soon we hold out our hands full of money. 00:42:49.790 --> 00:42:51.920 align:middle line:90% This is the desert. 00:42:51.920 --> 00:42:54.560 align:middle line:84% It is all we have left to destroy. 00:42:54.560 --> 00:42:58.349 align:middle line:90% 00:42:58.349 --> 00:43:01.700 align:middle line:84% [NATIVE AMERICAN BELLS PLAYING AND SINGING] 00:43:01.700 --> 00:43:18.940 align:middle line:90% 00:43:18.940 --> 00:43:22.660 align:middle line:84% Tonight, at the end of a long scar in the desert, 00:43:22.660 --> 00:43:26.500 align:middle line:84% a bulldozer sleeps with its mouth open, 00:43:26.500 --> 00:43:30.190 align:middle line:90% like a great yellow beast. 00:43:30.190 --> 00:43:34.690 align:middle line:84% A coyote sits down to watch it from a safe distance. 00:43:34.690 --> 00:43:39.340 align:middle line:84% An owl questions again and again. 00:43:39.340 --> 00:43:41.560 align:middle line:90% No answer. 00:43:41.560 --> 00:43:48.880 align:middle line:84% Someone is building a new road, a fine road, wide and smooth. 00:43:48.880 --> 00:43:54.070 align:middle line:84% The huge saguaros in its path have stood here 200 years 00:43:54.070 --> 00:43:56.930 align:middle line:90% looking up at the sky. 00:43:56.930 --> 00:44:01.680 align:middle line:84% This will be their last chance to see the moon. 00:44:01.680 --> 00:44:04.380 align:middle line:84% In the morning, the yellow beast will 00:44:04.380 --> 00:44:08.930 align:middle line:90% wake up and move toward them. 00:44:08.930 --> 00:44:11.000 align:middle line:90% We believe in movement. 00:44:11.000 --> 00:44:15.200 align:middle line:84% We live in the sanctity of mobile homes. 00:44:15.200 --> 00:44:20.090 align:middle line:84% We are the children of those who created the portable Indian 00:44:20.090 --> 00:44:24.080 align:middle line:84% and moved him from place to place. 00:44:24.080 --> 00:44:28.370 align:middle line:84% Ours is a republic of cylinders and pistons. 00:44:28.370 --> 00:44:30.500 align:middle line:90% A republic of wheels. 00:44:30.500 --> 00:44:34.070 align:middle line:84% Progress moves before us over the hill, 00:44:34.070 --> 00:44:38.180 align:middle line:84% and we pursue it as fast as we can. 00:44:38.180 --> 00:44:42.800 align:middle line:84% With our horses in trailers, our politicians in limousines, 00:44:42.800 --> 00:44:48.590 align:middle line:84% and all our angels on motorcycles, we pursue it. 00:44:48.590 --> 00:44:53.480 align:middle line:84% The world rolls on, and these gods of the desert cannot get 00:44:53.480 --> 00:44:55.280 align:middle line:90% out of its way. 00:44:55.280 --> 00:44:58.900 align:middle line:90% They are no use to us. 00:44:58.900 --> 00:45:02.470 align:middle line:84% I have stroked them until my hands are bloody, 00:45:02.470 --> 00:45:05.890 align:middle line:90% but what comfort can I offer? 00:45:05.890 --> 00:45:11.260 align:middle line:84% They are doomed, and I am tired of being human. 00:45:11.260 --> 00:45:15.790 align:middle line:84% Tired of being mad in a mad world. 00:45:15.790 --> 00:45:22.000 align:middle line:84% Now I lay me down in the new road, but to whom can I pray? 00:45:22.000 --> 00:45:24.880 align:middle line:90% The owl has stopped calling. 00:45:24.880 --> 00:45:29.060 align:middle line:84% The coyote gets up and fades away. 00:45:29.060 --> 00:45:32.440 align:middle line:84% I will look at the moon as long as I can, 00:45:32.440 --> 00:45:36.880 align:middle line:84% then I will sleep in the desert, helpless in the path 00:45:36.880 --> 00:45:41.320 align:middle line:84% of progress, waiting for the sound of wheels. 00:45:41.320 --> 00:45:48.682 align:middle line:90% 00:45:48.682 --> 00:45:51.930 align:middle line:84% [NATIVE AMERICAN BELLS PLAYING AND SINGING] 00:45:51.930 --> 00:46:11.210 align:middle line:90% 00:46:11.210 --> 00:46:16.550 align:middle line:84% A small child of a wind stumbles toward me down the arroyo, 00:46:16.550 --> 00:46:20.450 align:middle line:90% lost and carrying no light. 00:46:20.450 --> 00:46:24.560 align:middle line:84% Tearing it sleeves on thorns of the palo verde, 00:46:24.560 --> 00:46:27.200 align:middle line:84% talking to itself and to the dark 00:46:27.200 --> 00:46:32.510 align:middle line:84% shapes it touches, searching for what it has not lost and will 00:46:32.510 --> 00:46:33.710 align:middle line:90% never find. 00:46:33.710 --> 00:46:39.980 align:middle line:84% Searching, and lonelier than even I can imagine. 00:46:39.980 --> 00:46:45.290 align:middle line:84% The moon sleeps with her head on the buttocks of a young hill, 00:46:45.290 --> 00:46:50.900 align:middle line:84% and you lie before me under moonlight as if underwater. 00:46:50.900 --> 00:46:54.815 align:middle line:84% Oh, my desert, the coolness of your face. 00:46:54.815 --> 00:46:57.670 align:middle line:90% 00:46:57.670 --> 00:47:01.360 align:middle line:84% Men are coming inland to you, soon 00:47:01.360 --> 00:47:04.900 align:middle line:84% they will make you the last resort for tourists 00:47:04.900 --> 00:47:07.180 align:middle line:90% who have nowhere else to go. 00:47:07.180 --> 00:47:09.890 align:middle line:90% 00:47:09.890 --> 00:47:13.720 align:middle line:84% What will become of the coyote, with eyes of topaz, moving 00:47:13.720 --> 00:47:16.630 align:middle line:90% silently to his undoing? 00:47:16.630 --> 00:47:20.410 align:middle line:84% The ocatilla, flagellant of the wind, the deer climbing 00:47:20.410 --> 00:47:22.990 align:middle line:84% with dignity further into the mountains, 00:47:22.990 --> 00:47:26.940 align:middle line:90% the huge and delicate saguaro. 00:47:26.940 --> 00:47:31.020 align:middle line:84% What will become of those who cannot learn the terrible 00:47:31.020 --> 00:47:32.460 align:middle line:90% knowledge of cities? 00:47:32.460 --> 00:47:35.400 align:middle line:90% 00:47:35.400 --> 00:47:39.720 align:middle line:84% Years ago, I came to you as a stranger 00:47:39.720 --> 00:47:43.320 align:middle line:84% and have never been worthy to be called your lover 00:47:43.320 --> 00:47:45.600 align:middle line:90% or to speak your name. 00:47:45.600 --> 00:47:50.070 align:middle line:84% Loveliest, most silent sanctuary, 00:47:50.070 --> 00:47:56.400 align:middle line:84% more fragile than forests, more beautiful than water. 00:47:56.400 --> 00:48:00.870 align:middle line:84% I am older and uglier, and full of the knowledge 00:48:00.870 --> 00:48:04.560 align:middle line:84% that I do not belong to beauty and beauty 00:48:04.560 --> 00:48:07.650 align:middle line:90% does not belong to me. 00:48:07.650 --> 00:48:13.470 align:middle line:84% I have learned to accept whatever men choose to give me 00:48:13.470 --> 00:48:17.550 align:middle line:84% or whatever they choose to withhold. 00:48:17.550 --> 00:48:25.680 align:middle line:84% But, oh, my desert, yours is the only death I cannot bear. 00:48:25.680 --> 00:48:27.780 align:middle line:90% [WIND BLOWING] 00:48:27.780 --> 00:48:43.080 align:middle line:90% 00:48:43.080 --> 00:48:46.430 align:middle line:90% [ETHEREAL SINGING] 00:48:46.430 --> 00:49:47.000 align:middle line:90%