WEBVTT

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This poem is drawn
for its inspiration

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from detective stories.

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In this case, the hard-boiled
American detective stories

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of Raymond Chandler,
creator of Philip Marlowe,

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private detective in novels
like The Big Sleep, The Lady

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in the Lake, The Long Goodbye.

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And the poem has an epigraph
from Chandler, but not

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from one of the novels--
from a very short essay

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that Chandler wrote about the
writing of detective fiction.

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And the sentence is a
kind of ironic piece

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of advice to writers.

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And it goes, "When
in doubt, have a man

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come through a door
with a gun in his hand."

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[LAUGHTER]

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Like "Attack of
the Crab Monsters,"

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the poem is spoken
by a minor character

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in a typical detective novel.

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In this-- not the
detective, not the hero.

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And in this case, the
character's only function

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in the novel is
to be assassinated

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so that his body
can be discovered

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the next day by the detective so
that the plot can be furthered.

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In the case of the
poem, my character

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is aware of his function.

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And when confronted
by his assassin,

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the assassin momentarily
seems reluctant to kill him,

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and the character is forced
into the rather uncomfortable

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position of realizing
that if he isn't killed,

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the story just stops.

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The poem is called "The
Assassin's Fatal Error".

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"When in doubt, have a
man come through a door

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with a gun in his hand."

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He comes through the door,
the big gun in his fist.

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He says, "Nobody's
going anywhere."

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"Nobody was."

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[LAUGHTER]

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"Nobody is even here except
me and this bottle of scotch.

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And I'm used to waiting."

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He tells me to explain
about the pearls

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because he knows
ways to make me tell.

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However, I know
nothing about them.

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Nothing about Mr.
R or the big man,

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and nothing about Oregon,
where I have never

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lived at any time in my life.

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Perhaps I'm lying.

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But he's convinced.

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Although he will shoot me
anyway, which I understand.

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And perhaps I say,
"What kept you?"

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Probably, I just finished
the scotch, which

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is third rate but effective.

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Mine, you understand, has
been a temporary disguise,

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which may or may not be
explained at a later time.

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Its importance to the story lies
in the discovery of the body

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by the detective tomorrow.

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I also turn up three
chapters from the end

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as a doctor, where I can be
trusted even less than now,

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when I still have this
death to get through.

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"There must be
connections," I tell him.

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"There always are."

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And it's smart to leave
the witness silent,

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get the job over,
and get out of town.

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The gun wanders around the room.

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"Listen," I tell him.

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"Anything can happen.

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But this could be
the fatal error.

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You don't know any
more than I do."

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The long tube of the
silencer turns toward me.

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I consider the figure on
the trigger, the sound

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like somebody coughing
upstairs in an old building,

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and now the single
bullet suspended

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in the air between us.

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You could ask, but
what did I expect?

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And I would have
to say, "Only this.

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Nothing but this."

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