WEBVTT

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It is killer, actually.

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But you won't hear it tonight.

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Thank you, Chris, for that
wonderful introduction.

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And thank you to the University
of Arizona English department.

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And this is such a
beautiful facility.

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What a treat to be here.

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It's special for me,
for a number of reasons,

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to be on this campus.

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One of them being
that I have a lot

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of family history in the area.

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A lot of families settled
here on my father's side.

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My grandparents wintered
here, and I'm happy to say,

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several of my relatives from
my Grandmother Price's family

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are here tonight.

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I want to thank them personally
for coming down here to--

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I hope I don't
embarrass the family.

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But I'm sure you'll
tell my parents if I do.

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The last time, actually,
I was on this campus,

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it was part of a grand tour
that my maternal grandmother,

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Katherine, took me on.

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She wanted me to see
the medical school here.

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And then she took me on a tour
of the wealthier neighborhoods

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of Tucson because
I had just told her

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that I was no longer going
to be pursuing pre-medicine,

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that I was going to give that
up for a life of a writer.

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And she wanted me to see
exactly what I wasn't

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going to be able to afford.

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[LAUGHTER]

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So, I was having some flashbacks
today, driving around.

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I want to start
out tonight reading

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a little bit from this book,
Man Killed by Pheasant.

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And I'll finish up with some
stuff from the new book.

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I'm unapologetically
a memoirist.

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And there's lots of talk
about what memoir is

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and what it isn't, lots of
controversy surrounding it.

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One thing for sure,
it's an ancient form.

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In the West, going back to St.
Augustine, at the very least.

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And it's always, I
think, in one way

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or another, been used
to explore the sources

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of our ethical lives.

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What are our most cherished
values and beliefs?

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Where do they come from?

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How have they changed?

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How have they been
challenged over time?

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How do they separate
us from communities

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and draw us into
closer connection

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with those
communities, including

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ecological communities?

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And that's what a lot
of my work is about.

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I was raised in
Fort Dodge, Iowa.

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And like a lot of Midwestern
kids, wanted to leave,

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wanted to go elsewhere to
more exciting, more beautiful

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places, even though I come
from a very supportive family

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and community, and so forth.

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But that changed over time.

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And I'm going to I'm going to
read about that change here.

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I'm going to start off
with this a little section

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from a piece called
"High Maintenance," which

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is about my time in Iowa
City as a maintenance man.

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It's set in 1992, during the
first year of my marriage.

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And Steph and I were desperate
to find cheap housing.

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And some of you know,
in a college town,

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that's very difficult to find.

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So I struck up kind of
a deal with the devil

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with this landlord in town,
that for half off the rent,

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I would take care of the
maintenance for 24 apartment

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units.

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And anyone who knows me knows
that trusting me with wiring

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or plumbing is insanity.

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And that turned
out to be the case.

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It turned out very badly for
the tenants in that apartment.

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I spent a lot of time under the
covers, hiding from phone calls

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from angry tenants
and the landlord.

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And one other responsibility
I had during that time

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was to figure out if there
were any illegal pets

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in the apartment complex.

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And it turned out there
were a ton of them.

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And as soon as I
showed mercy to one,

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of course that got around
in the college community.

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And it was like Noah's Ark.

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They started flowing in.

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And suddenly, it was
completely out of control.

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I'm imagining that we're
going to be kicked out

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of the apartment and into the
streets, which would confirm

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exactly what my mother-in-law
told Steph would happen

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if she married me.

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So I'm very frightened at this
point in the essay, about what

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I'm going to do about this.

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And this is the beginning
of an extended flashback.

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"It may have been
under those covers

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that I began to recall
the happier times I'd

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spent at DeLuca
Dwellings, a dumpy

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foursquare where I'd rented a
room starting in my junior year

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and on into graduate school.

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It was owned and operated
by Clarence C. DeLuca,

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a bald elderly man
who always dressed

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in the same olive coveralls,
zipped too tight at the crotch.

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During my initial week as a
resident of DeLuca Dwellings,

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I received the first of
many newsletters Clarence

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would deliver to
me and the other 12

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people living in the house.

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"To the new leasee," it began,
"I say welcome to your new home

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away from home.

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You and each of you are a select
person in the strictest meaning

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of the word.

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The landlord is
very proud of you

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and have literally set
you upon a pedestal.

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Therefore, the
landlord expects you

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to be exemplary as a tenant in
compliance with the agreements,

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including a clean dwelling
and the maintenance

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of your good reputation.

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Quotes of the month,
Samuel Smiles.

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'To be worth anything,
character must

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be capable of standing
firm upon its feet

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in the world of daily work,
temptation, and trial,

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and able to bear the wear
and tear of actual life.

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Cloistered virtues do
not count for much.'

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Clarence C. DeLuca.

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Be mindful of other people, and
the purity of one's character

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will manifest itself generously
if one is truly well-meaning."

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At first, I found Mr. DeLuca's
high-minded enthusiasm

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to be infectious.

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I was in the process of
switching from pre-medicine

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to a religion major and was
in a high-minded mood myself.

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In addition, the other
tenant occupants of the house

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were the kind of people who,
like me, had moved there

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out of a hard-earned
desire for privacy,

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mostly humanities majors,
foreign students, and ex-cons.

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They made very few
social demands,

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so there was plenty of time
to maintain my dwelling

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and my good reputation.

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Then I got a pet mouse.

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I can't recall why
I purchased him.

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Pets were strictly
forbidden at DeLuca's.

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Perhaps it was because my
girlfriend had just dumped me

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or because the consequences of
giving up a medical career--

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again, the lost girlfriend--
had begun to finally hit home.

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Whatever the reasons,
I brought him home

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and named him Ernest T. Bass,
after the mischievous hillbilly

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on The Andy Griffith Show.

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During the first week,
Ernest repeatedly escaped

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from his cage and,
like his TV namesake,

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thwarted all efforts
to contain him.

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I finally bought him one of
those plastic free-rolling

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hamster spheres.

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But then, one evening,
he rolled out my door

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and bounced down two
flights of stairs.

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I caught up in time to see him
roll into Kurt Moody's room.

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I stood in the doorway panicked
that this stranger would

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report my pet to Clarence.

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Kurt picked the
sphere off the floor

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and grinned at Ernest,
who stared back,

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apparently unfazed by the
strange face or the two

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flights of stairs.

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During the ensuing
conversation, I

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learned that Kurt was a graduate
student in the creative writing

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program.

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He was the first serious
writer I'd ever met.

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And the close friendship
that developed

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was one of the reasons I
had become a writer myself,

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all because of a wayward mouse.

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Ernest soon became
the house mascot,

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roaming the halls in his
sphere, entering other rooms

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and introducing
me to more people

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than I would have ever
approached on my own.

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As a vibrant, sometimes
rowdy social life blossomed

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at DeLuca Dwellings,
we had less time

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for maintaining the
bathroom on our floor,

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and its condition
rapidly deteriorated.

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We weren't the only
ones who noticed.

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Clarence's newsletters became
increasingly despondent,

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culminating in volume 8,
number 9, April 2, 1987.

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"Exposé.

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Landlord denounces and
labels four residents

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as bad tenants, namely Jane
Pillhouse, John Price, Travis

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King, and Ling Yuk Chong.

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By definition,
'bad' means failing

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to reach an acceptable standard.

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Fact, the bad
tenants named above

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have failed to meet the
clean bathroom standard

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during the mandatory
clean bathroom

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days of March 15 and 29, 1987.

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The landlord hopes that this
public revelation has done its

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intended job well, that a wise
attitude of course of action

00:08:23.350 --> 00:08:26.080 align:middle line:84%
subsequently will reflect
intelligence commensurate with

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their chronological age and
apparent educational status,

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that the four bad tenants
are not incorrigible and will

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recall and heed the good
home training taught

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by their parents, that the
characteristic which carries

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the label 'bad' shall be
discarded for the label 'good.'

00:08:41.995 --> 00:08:44.710 align:middle line:90%


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Two adages are worth
repeating here.

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Character will out,
and time will tell.

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The landlord hereby
makes apology

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to all except the four bad
tenants for terminating

00:08:56.290 --> 00:08:57.970 align:middle line:90%
the letter at this point.

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Their frustration
and depression,

00:08:59.450 --> 00:09:01.492 align:middle line:84%
which has resulted in the
writing of this report,

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consumed all the
energy and enthusiasm

00:09:03.740 --> 00:09:06.140 align:middle line:84%
which is usually devoted
to an upbeat communication.

00:09:06.140 --> 00:09:09.530 align:middle line:90%


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Quote of the month.

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Eschenes.

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'He who acts wickedly
in private life

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can never be expected
to show himself

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noble in public conduct.

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He that is base at home will
not acquit himself with honor

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abroad, for it is not
the man, only the place,

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that has changed.'"

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In addition to being distributed
to every resident of the house,

00:09:31.010 --> 00:09:33.680 align:middle line:84%
the letter was sent to
parents and to those who

00:09:33.680 --> 00:09:37.220 align:middle line:90%
had written recommendations.

00:09:37.220 --> 00:09:39.170 align:middle line:84%
Among them are
bosses, professors,

00:09:39.170 --> 00:09:41.900 align:middle line:90%
and spiritual mentors.

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"He sent this to Reverend
Hearn, for God sakes,"

00:09:44.120 --> 00:09:46.430 align:middle line:84%
my mother shouted
into the phone.

00:09:46.430 --> 00:09:48.620 align:middle line:84%
"He makes it sound like you
all crap in the bathtub.

00:09:48.620 --> 00:09:49.880 align:middle line:90%
What's going on over there?"

00:09:49.880 --> 00:09:52.510 align:middle line:90%


00:09:52.510 --> 00:09:55.150 align:middle line:84%
She's still upset
about it, by the way.

00:09:55.150 --> 00:09:57.670 align:middle line:84%
In response to this
humiliation, my floormates and I

00:09:57.670 --> 00:10:00.130 align:middle line:84%
cranked our favorite Smiths'
song, "Sweet and Tender

00:10:00.130 --> 00:10:02.350 align:middle line:84%
Hooligan," and
spent the afternoon

00:10:02.350 --> 00:10:05.470 align:middle line:84%
scrubbing porcelain, pausing
only to drink more beer

00:10:05.470 --> 00:10:08.650 align:middle line:84%
and pay homage to Ernest,
who directed us from his cage

00:10:08.650 --> 00:10:10.660 align:middle line:90%
on the back of the toilet.

00:10:10.660 --> 00:10:12.790 align:middle line:84%
In a generous spirit, we
even cleaned the bathrooms

00:10:12.790 --> 00:10:14.290 align:middle line:84%
on the other
floors, helping Kurt

00:10:14.290 --> 00:10:18.130 align:middle line:84%
overcome his orange-streaked,
mildewy shower stall.

00:10:18.130 --> 00:10:20.230 align:middle line:84%
A month later, to
my mother's relief,

00:10:20.230 --> 00:10:23.230 align:middle line:84%
we were publicly exonerated
in the DeLuca Dwellings

00:10:23.230 --> 00:10:25.000 align:middle line:90%
newsletter.

00:10:25.000 --> 00:10:26.620 align:middle line:90%
This is an extended quote.

00:10:26.620 --> 00:10:29.620 align:middle line:84%
"Yes, a single
happening, that's all it

00:10:29.620 --> 00:10:32.230 align:middle line:84%
takes sometimes to make
or break one for life.

00:10:32.230 --> 00:10:34.870 align:middle line:90%


00:10:34.870 --> 00:10:39.140 align:middle line:84%
Remember Wallace,
Agnew, Nixon, and Hart?

00:10:39.140 --> 00:10:41.180 align:middle line:84%
This single accomplishment
bathroom cleaning

00:10:41.180 --> 00:10:43.520 align:middle line:84%
may be construed
virtuous, demonstrating

00:10:43.520 --> 00:10:45.800 align:middle line:84%
a commendable quality and
conformity to a standard

00:10:45.800 --> 00:10:47.150 align:middle line:90%
of what is right and good.

00:10:47.150 --> 00:10:49.580 align:middle line:84%
For anyone who may be struggling
and are now vindicated,

00:10:49.580 --> 00:10:52.730 align:middle line:84%
your landlord suggests that
you exercise your integrity

00:10:52.730 --> 00:10:54.740 align:middle line:90%
over small and weak.

00:10:54.740 --> 00:10:57.200 align:middle line:84%
Consequently if you are
truly one of goodwill,

00:10:57.200 --> 00:10:59.240 align:middle line:84%
predisposed to conform
to sanctioned codes

00:10:59.240 --> 00:11:01.250 align:middle line:84%
or accepted notions
of right and wrong,

00:11:01.250 --> 00:11:06.140 align:middle line:84%
your character shall
grow and become strong."

00:11:06.140 --> 00:11:08.570 align:middle line:84%
My floormates and I celebrated
by filling the bathtub

00:11:08.570 --> 00:11:13.280 align:middle line:84%
with ice, purchasing a pony
keg, and throwing a house party.

00:11:13.280 --> 00:11:15.560 align:middle line:84%
All night, amidst the
revelry and dancing legs,

00:11:15.560 --> 00:11:17.705 align:middle line:84%
the guest of honor rolled
in his plastic sphere.

00:11:17.705 --> 00:11:20.510 align:middle line:90%


00:11:20.510 --> 00:11:22.640 align:middle line:84%
Ernest lived another
year or so before

00:11:22.640 --> 00:11:24.650 align:middle line:90%
dying peacefully in his sleep.

00:11:24.650 --> 00:11:27.080 align:middle line:84%
When I told my neighbors,
there was general sadness.

00:11:27.080 --> 00:11:28.850 align:middle line:90%
We had lost one of our own.

00:11:28.850 --> 00:11:30.590 align:middle line:84%
At a sunset funeral
in the front yard,

00:11:30.590 --> 00:11:33.230 align:middle line:84%
Kurt read a poem while others
tossed violets and small

00:11:33.230 --> 00:11:35.570 align:middle line:90%
bundles of seed into the grave.

00:11:35.570 --> 00:11:37.200 align:middle line:84%
I remain close to
several of them,

00:11:37.200 --> 00:11:39.320 align:middle line:84%
including Kurt, who
took off for Los Angeles

00:11:39.320 --> 00:11:41.420 align:middle line:90%
to become a screenplay writer.

00:11:41.420 --> 00:11:43.730 align:middle line:84%
A few years later, he was
murdered in an attempt

00:11:43.730 --> 00:11:45.290 align:middle line:90%
to steal his car.

00:11:45.290 --> 00:11:47.990 align:middle line:84%
The last time I saw him,
during one of his brief visits

00:11:47.990 --> 00:11:51.680 align:middle line:84%
from California, we sat in
our favorite bar reminiscing

00:11:51.680 --> 00:11:53.840 align:middle line:84%
about DeLuca Dwellings
and about Ernest.

00:11:53.840 --> 00:11:58.150 align:middle line:84%
We lifted our glasses to
the memory of a lost friend.

00:11:58.150 --> 00:11:59.152 align:middle line:90%