WEBVTT

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This poem is called "The
Father of My Country"

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and it's from a whole collection
of poems called The George

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Washington.

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"All fathers in
Western civilization

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must have a military origin.

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The ruler, governor, yes,
he is, was the general

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at one time or other.

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And George Washington won
the hearts of his country.

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The rough military man with
awkward, sincere drawing room

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manners.

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My father, have you ever
heard me speak of him?

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I seldom do.

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But I had a father and he had
military origins or my origins

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from him are military, militant.

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That is I remember him only
in uniform, but of the Navy,

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30 years of Chief Petty
Officer always away from home.

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It is rough, hard
for me to speak now.

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I'm not used to
talking about him.

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Not used to naming
his objects, objects

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that never surrounded me.

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A woodpecker with fresh bloody
crests knocks at my mouth.

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Father, for the first
time, I say your name,

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name rolled in thick
Polish parchment scroll,

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name of Roman candle drippings
when I sit at my table

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alone each night.

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Name of Naval uniform
and name of telegram.

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Name of coming home from
your aircraft carrier.

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Name of shiny shoes.

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Name of Hawaiian dolls.

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Name of mess spoons,
name of greasy machinery

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and name of stenciled names.

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Is it your blood I
carry in a test tube?

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My arm, to let fall,
crack, and spill

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on the sidewalk in front of
the men I know, I love, I know?

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So you left my house
when I was under two,

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being replaced by
other machinery

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and I didn't
believe you left me.

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This scene, the
trunk-yielding treasures

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of a green fountain pen,
heart-shaped mirror,

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amber beads, old
letters with brown ink

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and the gopher snakes
stretched across the palm

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tree in the front yard with
woody trunk-like monkey

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skin and a sunset through
the skinny persimmon trees.

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You came walking.

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Not even a telegram or
postcard from Tahiti.

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Love, love through my heart like
ink in the thickest nubbed pen,

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black and flowing into words.

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You came to me and
I at least six.

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Six doilies of lace,
six battleship cannon,

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six old beer bottles, six
thick steaks, six love letters,

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six clocks running backwards,
six watermelons, and six baby

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teeth.

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The six cornered hat on six
men's heads, six lovers at once

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or one lover at
sixes and sevens.

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How I confuse this
with my dream.

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Walking the tightrope
bridge with gold knots

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over the mouth of an
anemone, tissue spiral lips,

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and holding on so
that the ropes burn

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as if my wrists had been tied.

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If George Washington had not
been the father of my country,

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it is doubtful that I would
ever have found a father.

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Father in my mouth, on
my lips, in my tongue,

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out of all my womanly fire.

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Father I have left in
my steel filing cabinet

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as a name on my
birth certificate.

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Father I have left in the teeth
pulled out of dentist's office

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and thrown into
their garbage cans.

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Father living in my wide
cheekbones and short feet.

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Father in my Polish tantrums
and my American speech.

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Father, not a holy name.

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Not a name I cherish,
but the name I bear.

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The name that makes me one
of a kind in any phone book,

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because you changed it
and nobody but us has it.

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Father who makes me dream
in the dead of night

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of the falling cherry blossoms.

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Father who makes me know all men
will leave me if I love them.

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Father who made me a
maverick, a writer, a namer.

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Name, father, son, father, moon,
father, bloody Mars father.

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Other children said,
my father is a doctor,

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or my father gave
me this camera,

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or my father took me to
the movies, or my father

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and I went swimming.

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But my father is
coming in a letter

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once a month for a while.

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And my father sometimes
came in a telegram.

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Mostly, my father
came to me in speech.

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My father, because I
dreamed it one night

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that I dug through the ash
heap in back of the pepper tree

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and found a diamond
shaped like a dog.

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And my father called the dog
and it came leaping over to him

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and he walked away out of the
yard down the road with the dog

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jumping and yipping
at his heels.

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My father was not in the
telephone book in my city.

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My father was not sleeping
with my mother at home.

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My father did not care
if I studied the piano.

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My father did not
care what I did.

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And I thought my father
handsome and I loved him.

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And I wondered why he
left me alone so much.

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So many years in fact.

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But my father made me
what I am, a lonely woman

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without a purpose, Just
as I was a lonely child

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without any father, I walk with
words, words, and names, names.

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Father was not one of my words.

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Father was not one of my names.

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But now I say,
George Washington,

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you have become my father in
his 20th century naval uniform.

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George Washington,
I need your love.

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George, I want to call
you father, father,

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my father, the father of
my country, that is me.

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And I say the name to
chant it, to sing it,

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to lace it around me
like weaving cloth,

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like a happy child on that
shining afternoon in the palm

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tree sunset with her mother's
trunk yielding treasures.

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I cry and cry, father, father,
have you really come home."

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