WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.680 align:middle line:90% 00:00:01.680 --> 00:00:03.360 align:middle line:84% Let's see how much time I've got here. 00:00:03.360 --> 00:00:04.650 align:middle line:90% Not much. 00:00:04.650 --> 00:00:07.470 align:middle line:84% I'll throw in a couple of things here 00:00:07.470 --> 00:00:12.330 align:middle line:84% simply because I like them, and in order 00:00:12.330 --> 00:00:16.260 align:middle line:84% to give me an excuse to give you another quote, which 00:00:16.260 --> 00:00:17.310 align:middle line:90% I like very much. 00:00:17.310 --> 00:00:20.640 align:middle line:84% The first of these poems is about the great losers 00:00:20.640 --> 00:00:23.160 align:middle line:84% of the world who are considered evil. 00:00:23.160 --> 00:00:30.150 align:middle line:84% And Ramakrishna once said when he was asked, "God being good, 00:00:30.150 --> 00:00:31.830 align:middle line:90% why did He create evil?" 00:00:31.830 --> 00:00:34.320 align:middle line:84% And he said, "To thicken the plot." 00:00:34.320 --> 00:00:39.480 align:middle line:84% I think this is a really marvelous thing. 00:00:39.480 --> 00:00:42.810 align:middle line:84% So I have written a poem about the plot thickeners, 00:00:42.810 --> 00:00:49.260 align:middle line:84% and it's broken some of my own rules. 00:00:49.260 --> 00:00:53.610 align:middle line:84% The first stanza involves several quasi, pseudo, 00:00:53.610 --> 00:00:56.915 align:middle line:84% semi-literary references, which I apologize for. 00:00:56.915 --> 00:00:59.290 align:middle line:84% I don't like that sort of thing, but these are so simple. 00:00:59.290 --> 00:01:00.420 align:middle line:84% I don't think you'd have any trouble 00:01:00.420 --> 00:01:02.712 align:middle line:84% except with the first one, which might not be familiar, 00:01:02.712 --> 00:01:04.989 align:middle line:84% especially to the women in the audience. 00:01:04.989 --> 00:01:08.400 align:middle line:84% The first one is the girl in the high-heeled shoes. 00:01:08.400 --> 00:01:12.330 align:middle line:84% I think men who've been in barracks or dormitory 00:01:12.330 --> 00:01:13.500 align:middle line:90% would recognize this. 00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:14.940 align:middle line:90% It's the old saying-- 00:01:14.940 --> 00:01:15.960 align:middle line:90% I think it's British. 00:01:15.960 --> 00:01:18.207 align:middle line:84% Here's to the girl in the high-heeled shoes. 00:01:18.207 --> 00:01:20.040 align:middle line:84% She spends your money and drinks your booze, 00:01:20.040 --> 00:01:21.707 align:middle line:84% and then goes home to her mother's flat. 00:01:21.707 --> 00:01:25.260 align:middle line:90% Stingy, stingy, stingy. 00:01:25.260 --> 00:01:27.210 align:middle line:84% And then there's a reference in it 00:01:27.210 --> 00:01:31.140 align:middle line:84% to the sparrow who admitted everything 00:01:31.140 --> 00:01:34.500 align:middle line:84% who is, of course, the one who said, "I killed Cock 00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:36.390 align:middle line:90% Robin with my bow and arrow. 00:01:36.390 --> 00:01:37.740 align:middle line:90% I, said the sparrow." 00:01:37.740 --> 00:01:39.870 align:middle line:84% That reference, and then there's a garbled one, 00:01:39.870 --> 00:01:41.495 align:middle line:84% which won't give you any trouble, which 00:01:41.495 --> 00:01:44.790 align:middle line:84% is "the face that sank a thousand ships." 00:01:44.790 --> 00:01:47.340 align:middle line:84% And I have LD Clark to thank for that. 00:01:47.340 --> 00:01:49.095 align:middle line:84% I heard him misquote that one time. 00:01:49.095 --> 00:01:50.970 align:middle line:84% Of course, it's supposed to be "the face that 00:01:50.970 --> 00:01:52.950 align:middle line:90% launched a thousand ships." 00:01:52.950 --> 00:01:57.180 align:middle line:84% But the results when he said it were quite devastating 00:01:57.180 --> 00:01:58.920 align:middle line:84% because he was talking about somebody 00:01:58.920 --> 00:02:02.196 align:middle line:84% on the stage portraying Helen of Troy at that moment. 00:02:02.196 --> 00:02:09.009 align:middle line:90% [LAUGHTER] 00:02:09.009 --> 00:02:11.110 align:middle line:90% It's called "A Toast." 00:02:11.110 --> 00:02:13.120 align:middle line:90% It isn't very long. 00:02:13.120 --> 00:02:15.580 align:middle line:84% Here's to the girl in the high-heeled shoes. 00:02:15.580 --> 00:02:17.890 align:middle line:84% The dog in the manger, the sparrow 00:02:17.890 --> 00:02:21.160 align:middle line:84% who admitted everything, the face that sank a thousand 00:02:21.160 --> 00:02:24.160 align:middle line:84% ships, the village idiot, the farmer's daughter, 00:02:24.160 --> 00:02:27.460 align:middle line:84% the good men who did not come to the aid of their country, 00:02:27.460 --> 00:02:30.790 align:middle line:90% and Judas Iscariot. 00:02:30.790 --> 00:02:34.630 align:middle line:84% Whose names are passwords into the House of Scandal, who 00:02:34.630 --> 00:02:38.770 align:middle line:84% caught the brass ring of guilt and could never let go. 00:02:38.770 --> 00:02:42.170 align:middle line:84% For you, the clock on the tower faces both ways. 00:02:42.170 --> 00:02:46.660 align:middle line:84% And every day the roller coaster says, "Here we go again." 00:02:46.660 --> 00:02:50.200 align:middle line:84% As my mistakes line up in readiness, 00:02:50.200 --> 00:02:54.460 align:middle line:84% and I know I will need them, I look back and salute you 00:02:54.460 --> 00:02:56.740 align:middle line:90% with your reasons. 00:02:56.740 --> 00:02:59.830 align:middle line:84% Let my words be scars on the page, which each of us 00:02:59.830 --> 00:03:05.380 align:middle line:84% can translate into his own pain, and enjoy it, enjoy it. 00:03:05.380 --> 00:03:09.040 align:middle line:84% I drink to your calumny who had only one ore 00:03:09.040 --> 00:03:11.590 align:middle line:90% and traveled in circles. 00:03:11.590 --> 00:03:14.740 align:middle line:84% You were there when they built the sea of regret. 00:03:14.740 --> 00:03:19.290 align:middle line:84% And every night, you return to find it waiting. 00:03:19.290 --> 00:03:20.490 align:middle line:90%