WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.815 align:middle line:90% 00:00:02.815 --> 00:00:03.315 align:middle line:90% "Trains." 00:00:03.315 --> 00:00:05.850 align:middle line:90% 00:00:05.850 --> 00:00:08.280 align:middle line:90% This is for my sister Edie. 00:00:08.280 --> 00:00:11.100 align:middle line:84% This early in the morning, the clouds have cleared 00:00:11.100 --> 00:00:14.640 align:middle line:84% and I hear the whistles of train after train 00:00:14.640 --> 00:00:19.110 align:middle line:84% rolling across the desert five miles south in the dark. 00:00:19.110 --> 00:00:22.050 align:middle line:84% I remember trains, the one that carried 00:00:22.050 --> 00:00:24.300 align:middle line:84% you north to the forest in autumn, 00:00:24.300 --> 00:00:28.290 align:middle line:84% as if no other mode of travel was good enough. 00:00:28.290 --> 00:00:30.930 align:middle line:90% But we had our own, didn't we? 00:00:30.930 --> 00:00:35.100 align:middle line:84% The warm tongue of dope, cool teeth of booze, 00:00:35.100 --> 00:00:39.300 align:middle line:84% the dirty fingers of men whose names we could never remember 00:00:39.300 --> 00:00:42.390 align:middle line:90% no matter how hard we tried. 00:00:42.390 --> 00:00:46.080 align:middle line:84% What was it about us we hated so much? 00:00:46.080 --> 00:00:50.310 align:middle line:84% Sleeping in strangers beds was easier than even approaching 00:00:50.310 --> 00:00:52.830 align:middle line:90% that age old question. 00:00:52.830 --> 00:00:56.790 align:middle line:84% The ratty Motor Lodge just south of Newport that summer, 00:00:56.790 --> 00:01:01.320 align:middle line:84% its depression ware dishes in dull primary colors, 00:01:01.320 --> 00:01:04.920 align:middle line:84% the muddy spring trickling down to the beach like blood 00:01:04.920 --> 00:01:06.510 align:middle line:90% from a cut. 00:01:06.510 --> 00:01:11.490 align:middle line:84% No one could ever sweep all the grit off those chipped linoleum 00:01:11.490 --> 00:01:12.960 align:middle line:90% tiles. 00:01:12.960 --> 00:01:16.740 align:middle line:84% The two brothers who owned the place, what do the older ones 00:01:16.740 --> 00:01:20.560 align:middle line:90% hands feel like on your skin? 00:01:20.560 --> 00:01:22.830 align:middle line:90% I met a man just after you left. 00:01:22.830 --> 00:01:27.240 align:middle line:84% When we slid away from the bar and headed out to his house 00:01:27.240 --> 00:01:31.320 align:middle line:84% he was the nicest guy I'd ever known in my life. 00:01:31.320 --> 00:01:35.190 align:middle line:84% But there were Nam ghosts inside those walls, shadows 00:01:35.190 --> 00:01:37.560 align:middle line:90% of his petrified wife and kids. 00:01:37.560 --> 00:01:40.710 align:middle line:84% He had to take a shower right after we did it 00:01:40.710 --> 00:01:41.985 align:middle line:90% on the living room floor. 00:01:41.985 --> 00:01:44.730 align:middle line:90% 00:01:44.730 --> 00:01:49.530 align:middle line:84% He laid down a blanket first and quoted Genesis to me. 00:01:49.530 --> 00:01:52.290 align:middle line:84% The tracks were just behind his back fence 00:01:52.290 --> 00:01:55.950 align:middle line:84% and I could see myself running along those shrieking metal 00:01:55.950 --> 00:01:59.160 align:middle line:84% rails, nothing but the clothes on my back 00:01:59.160 --> 00:02:02.040 align:middle line:84% and a photo of you in my pocket, you're 00:02:02.040 --> 00:02:05.460 align:middle line:90% scared eyes staring at nothing. 00:02:05.460 --> 00:02:09.690 align:middle line:84% I pulled myself up into one of those empty cars heading 00:02:09.690 --> 00:02:13.230 align:middle line:84% east or west, it didn't make any difference. 00:02:13.230 --> 00:02:17.430 align:middle line:84% After I caught my breath, I glanced back toward town. 00:02:17.430 --> 00:02:20.570 align:middle line:90% Not a single soul was watching. 00:02:20.570 --> 00:02:22.000 align:middle line:90%