WEBVTT

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[APPLAUSE]

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Fred Kiefer.

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When I arrived in Tucson
three seven years ago,

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it became a regular member
of the Department Lunch Bunch

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which was a wonderful
institution.

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Allowing me to get to
know my colleagues in ways

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I never could have.

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Over the years our group
dwindled, until there was just

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Roger Bowen and myself.

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And we had lunch together
all the days of our career.

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And then suddenly, one
day Steve showed up.

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We had no idea why.

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[LAUGHTER]

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Several days after Steve's
arrival, Roger said to me,

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"It looks as though
Steve will be joining us.

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[LAUGHTER]

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I said, "Looks that way."

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And I wondered to
myself, what in the world

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do I have in common with Steve?

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We had always had a cordial
relationship as colleagues,

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but I hadn't even
begun to know the man.

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I need never have read it,
although I was initially

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put off by Steve's
questions about the most

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private of matters.

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[LAUGHTER]

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What one of his friends has
called the Steve interview.

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[LAUGHTER]

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I soon realized he had
no personal agenda,

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he was simply curious
about the people he met.

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And that curiosity led him to
ask questions that most of us

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were reluctant to ask.

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When Roger retired
and moved to Thailand,

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the lunch group consisted
of just Steve and myself.

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As time went on, I
came to understand him

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in an entirely new way.

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I learned about his parents,
his family, his boyhood friends,

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about life in Holyoke and Iowa.

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Steve was always splendid
company, a born raconteur

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with a wonderful laugh.

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Much of the time, we shared
lunch seven days a week.

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We enjoyed talking about books
and poetry, movies and TV.

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People who saw Steve
and I together,

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must have thought we
were an odd couple.

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It was Steve with his wild hair,
his tattoos, and black attire.

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And there was I more,
well, buttoned up.

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[LAUGHTER]

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Steve was gregarious,
and blessed

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with the ability to engage and
get along with everyone he met.

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I've always been a quiet guy.

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But Steve and I were at one
in our love for our language,

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the sheer versatility
of English.

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And we were at one
on our fascination

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with the way writers use
language to convey complexity

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of meaning.

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If I were to recount a single
moment illustrative of Steve's

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nature, it would be
something that happened

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a little over a year ago.

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My mother had gotten a diagnosis
of dementia at September,

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and my brother and I were
seeking to keep her out

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of an institution.

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I brought my mother
to Tucson in November

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so that I might give
my brother a break.

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We were dining at the
Kingfisher one evening,

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and I noticed Steve
across the room.

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I went over to him and Gail,
was introduced to Gail's mother.

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And I said to Steve,
"You could do me

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a really big favor by
coming over to our table

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and saying, Hello."

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You see, my mother
already knew Steve.

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The three of us had once
had dinner together.

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Gracious as ever, Steve
gave my mother a hug,

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told her how good
she was looking,

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and how nice her hair was.

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Always a sore point.

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My mother positively
glowed, such

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was Steve's effect
on other people.

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Steve's effect on me
was even more profound,

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I began to rely
more and more on him

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for advice about the
most personal of matters.

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My background and
upbringing were to be sure,

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worlds apart from Steve's.

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I came from a right
wing, conservative,

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and some might say narrow
minded world of Catholic belief.

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What that world handed me,
was a cluster of assumptions

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I felt to challenge.

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Over the years while
listening to Steve,

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I found myself
doubting opinions that

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had come to feel like facts.

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I began to re-examine
my views, and they began

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to evolve in a new direction.

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Now Steve as all of you
know, never pontificated.

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He was the least judgmental
person I've ever met.

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Friendship with Steve
however, changed me.

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Not through any
specific remarks he

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made, but through the
content of his character

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and the power of his example.

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The great gift Steve
gave me was this,

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he showed me a new way of
relating to other people.

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I realized the
importance of respecting

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the dignity of everyone I met.

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I became a much better man
than I'd ever been before.

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[CLAPPING]

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