WEBVTT

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Animals.

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It happened in broad daylight.

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A museum of world renown
was exhibiting the facts

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on behalf of the people
when animals stole

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their way past the
absurdist and the realists

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with the acclaimed collection.

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Disagreement persists as
to which animal is now

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running with the facts, and
whether the perpetrator is

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the ultimate beneficiary.

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If collusion among the
species was at play,

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one could say the entire
kingdom is up for grabs.

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If it were one beast
acting on its own accord,

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friends and family have not
come forward with any clues.

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On one matter, however,
a consensus remains.

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The facts will
never be the same.

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To say they are being
dragged through the mud

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would be an oversimplification.

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To argue that they are
being chewed to pieces

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suggests that they
could be broken down.

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And to assume that
they can even be

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held in the jaws of
one callous creature

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is simply grist for the mill.

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The reality is that
most people never

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view the facts when
they were mounted

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or before they were
purchased by a family

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trust for an undisclosed sum.

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Only a privileged few actually
held the facts in their hands,

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and they are all deceased.

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While a visit to
their burial sites

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has been recommended by a
committee of volunteers,

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access has been denied, as
the pursuit of the facts

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has been deemed to be
no spiritual matter.

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And though roads, bridges, and
tunnels have been sealed off,

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conventional wisdom
has determined

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that whatever four-legged
species committed the crime,

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it is now a flock of
birds careening out

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of control with the weight
of biblical dimension

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crushing its wings.

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Thus all bodies of water have
been summoned back to land,

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and all clouds and
patches of blue sky

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are passing through
routine inspection.

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What has emerged is
a kind of dinosaur

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that without the constitution
to breathe in another medium

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will not survive.

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And so fact checkers
the world over

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have since been caught
lying on their backs,

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holding their breath
for this time to pass.

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