WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:01.800 align:middle line:90% 00:00:01.800 --> 00:00:04.837 align:middle line:84% And I'll end with one of my favorite pieces. 00:00:04.837 --> 00:00:08.730 align:middle line:90% 00:00:08.730 --> 00:00:10.500 align:middle line:84% I was working on this book, but I 00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:13.830 align:middle line:84% wanted to give Simon Ortiz something good 00:00:13.830 --> 00:00:19.590 align:middle line:84% for the-- he was guest editing, did guest edit last winter, 00:00:19.590 --> 00:00:21.930 align:middle line:84% not this past winter, but the winter before, 00:00:21.930 --> 00:00:31.300 align:middle line:84% the Kenyon Review, an Indigenous writers special issue. 00:00:31.300 --> 00:00:33.780 align:middle line:84% And so I'd been working with this material, 00:00:33.780 --> 00:00:37.800 align:middle line:84% and I knew that it was going to go into Turquoise Ledge, 00:00:37.800 --> 00:00:42.040 align:middle line:84% but I got it all polished up for Simon and gave it to him. 00:00:42.040 --> 00:00:44.370 align:middle line:90% And I had made-- 00:00:44.370 --> 00:00:49.990 align:middle line:90% well, I've started working. 00:00:49.990 --> 00:00:52.170 align:middle line:84% I never gave up on being a visual artist. 00:00:52.170 --> 00:00:54.310 align:middle line:84% That was what I always wanted to do. 00:00:54.310 --> 00:00:55.930 align:middle line:90% I didn't set out to be a writer. 00:00:55.930 --> 00:00:58.680 align:middle line:90% I wanted to be a visual artist. 00:00:58.680 --> 00:01:02.460 align:middle line:84% I got very discouraged very fast by the University of New Mexico 00:01:02.460 --> 00:01:03.480 align:middle line:90% art department. 00:01:03.480 --> 00:01:06.510 align:middle line:84% They were very old fashioned in those days 00:01:06.510 --> 00:01:09.660 align:middle line:84% and they didn't even want to admit 00:01:09.660 --> 00:01:14.310 align:middle line:84% that there was such a thing as Jackson Pollock I don't think, 00:01:14.310 --> 00:01:17.070 align:middle line:90% much less Indigenous art. 00:01:17.070 --> 00:01:21.450 align:middle line:84% And so I saw that they were going to flunk me out anyway. 00:01:21.450 --> 00:01:24.000 align:middle line:90% But I never stopped. 00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.030 align:middle line:84% So I went over into the English department. 00:01:27.030 --> 00:01:31.050 align:middle line:84% And they were a little more enlightened. 00:01:31.050 --> 00:01:32.650 align:middle line:90% But I never gave up on it. 00:01:32.650 --> 00:01:35.760 align:middle line:84% So when I was working on this book, 00:01:35.760 --> 00:01:39.840 align:middle line:84% I decided that once you reached the age, you get around 60, 00:01:39.840 --> 00:01:42.810 align:middle line:84% you better quit putting things off. 00:01:42.810 --> 00:01:44.140 align:middle line:90% You don't know. 00:01:44.140 --> 00:01:46.710 align:middle line:84% And so I had started doing a lot of artwork. 00:01:46.710 --> 00:01:52.590 align:middle line:84% And so this piece that I worked out for Simon 00:01:52.590 --> 00:01:59.760 align:middle line:84% came out of this, me doing artwork and also my poor garden 00:01:59.760 --> 00:02:00.375 align:middle line:90% that I have. 00:02:00.375 --> 00:02:03.540 align:middle line:90% 00:02:03.540 --> 00:02:08.160 align:middle line:84% Because you can't get anything to grow in the ground. 00:02:08.160 --> 00:02:11.550 align:middle line:84% The indigenous things come and steal the water and food. 00:02:11.550 --> 00:02:14.880 align:middle line:84% So everything has to be in a flower pot. 00:02:14.880 --> 00:02:20.530 align:middle line:84% So I have sort of a garden made of mismatched pots and things. 00:02:20.530 --> 00:02:26.565 align:middle line:90% And so this is the story here. 00:02:26.565 --> 00:02:29.550 align:middle line:90% 00:02:29.550 --> 00:02:33.870 align:middle line:84% At the end of September, the heat began to recede 00:02:33.870 --> 00:02:36.990 align:middle line:84% and a rainstorm revived my garden. 00:02:36.990 --> 00:02:39.600 align:middle line:84% The pink and the white rain lilies bloomed, 00:02:39.600 --> 00:02:42.690 align:middle line:84% and I kept watering them after the rain left 00:02:42.690 --> 00:02:47.310 align:middle line:84% for the bees and the butterflies and for me. 00:02:47.310 --> 00:02:51.810 align:middle line:84% One morning as I watered, I saw two large grasshoppers, 00:02:51.810 --> 00:02:54.970 align:middle line:84% amazing in their beauty and their size. 00:02:54.970 --> 00:02:58.050 align:middle line:84% Their outer wings were emerald green in the center 00:02:58.050 --> 00:03:00.750 align:middle line:84% with peacock green along the edges. 00:03:00.750 --> 00:03:05.220 align:middle line:84% The inner wings were hues of magenta red and magenta pink 00:03:05.220 --> 00:03:08.790 align:middle line:84% with lacy leaf patterns in bright yellow. 00:03:08.790 --> 00:03:11.040 align:middle line:84% Their faces and necks were outlined 00:03:11.040 --> 00:03:14.430 align:middle line:84% in bright yellow on jade green and their antennae 00:03:14.430 --> 00:03:18.510 align:middle line:84% were bright orange with bold black stripes. 00:03:18.510 --> 00:03:22.440 align:middle line:84% They sat in the cluster of pink rain lily blossoms 00:03:22.440 --> 00:03:24.000 align:middle line:90% they'd been eating. 00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:28.440 align:middle line:84% They regarded me fearlessly, with great majesty. 00:03:28.440 --> 00:03:33.870 align:middle line:84% Their bright black eyes looked intently into mine. 00:03:33.870 --> 00:03:37.260 align:middle line:84% As soon as I saw them, I wanted to sketch the grasshoppers 00:03:37.260 --> 00:03:40.230 align:middle line:84% in colored pencil, but I was busy and went off 00:03:40.230 --> 00:03:41.970 align:middle line:90% to do other chores. 00:03:41.970 --> 00:03:44.070 align:middle line:90% I worked on the manuscript. 00:03:44.070 --> 00:03:46.980 align:middle line:90% I forgot about the grasshoppers. 00:03:46.980 --> 00:03:49.770 align:middle line:84% The next day, I found one of the big grasshoppers 00:03:49.770 --> 00:03:52.110 align:middle line:90% under the potted fig tree. 00:03:52.110 --> 00:03:55.710 align:middle line:84% He walked unsteadily as if drunk or sick. 00:03:55.710 --> 00:04:00.660 align:middle line:84% His antennae moved feebly, but he didn't seem afraid of me. 00:04:00.660 --> 00:04:02.880 align:middle line:84% I picked him up carefully and moved him 00:04:02.880 --> 00:04:06.420 align:middle line:84% so he wouldn't drown when I watered the fig tree. 00:04:06.420 --> 00:04:08.640 align:middle line:90% I wondered what had happened. 00:04:08.640 --> 00:04:10.037 align:middle line:90% Poison? 00:04:10.037 --> 00:04:12.120 align:middle line:84% I wondered about that, because I don't use poison. 00:04:12.120 --> 00:04:17.670 align:middle line:84% But then I remembered, his life was the length of a summer. 00:04:17.670 --> 00:04:21.089 align:middle line:90% He was dying of old age. 00:04:21.089 --> 00:04:23.820 align:middle line:84% Still, he was arresting in his beauty, 00:04:23.820 --> 00:04:27.060 align:middle line:84% and his steady gaze connected with mine. 00:04:27.060 --> 00:04:29.880 align:middle line:84% The vivid colors and intricate markings 00:04:29.880 --> 00:04:32.800 align:middle line:90% were unlike any I'd ever seen. 00:04:32.800 --> 00:04:35.790 align:middle line:84% I left him in the rain lilies to die in peace. 00:04:35.790 --> 00:04:38.460 align:middle line:90% 00:04:38.460 --> 00:04:41.730 align:middle line:84% The next morning I found the grasshopper in the rain lily 00:04:41.730 --> 00:04:47.190 align:middle line:84% leaves, dead some might say, because he didn't move anymore. 00:04:47.190 --> 00:04:49.440 align:middle line:84% But he was still brightly colored, 00:04:49.440 --> 00:04:52.140 align:middle line:90% so there was life in him yet. 00:04:52.140 --> 00:04:55.980 align:middle line:84% I gently picked him up and brought him into my studio. 00:04:55.980 --> 00:04:59.160 align:middle line:84% I needed to hold him in place somehow. 00:04:59.160 --> 00:05:02.850 align:middle line:84% All I had was a shot glass where I stood him up 00:05:02.850 --> 00:05:06.210 align:middle line:84% so I could see his thorax plainly. 00:05:06.210 --> 00:05:10.200 align:middle line:84% As I sketched him, I realized he wanted a portrait 00:05:10.200 --> 00:05:14.400 align:middle line:84% in the manner of the star being portraits I painted. 00:05:14.400 --> 00:05:18.960 align:middle line:84% Earlier in The Turquoise Ledge I explain about these star 00:05:18.960 --> 00:05:22.050 align:middle line:90% being portraits. 00:05:22.050 --> 00:05:27.660 align:middle line:84% Very intimidating, these star beings and their portraits. 00:05:27.660 --> 00:05:30.570 align:middle line:84% I realized he wanted a portrait in the manner of the star 00:05:30.570 --> 00:05:32.550 align:middle line:90% being portraits I painted. 00:05:32.550 --> 00:05:35.610 align:middle line:84% Later after I finished the grasshopper sketch, 00:05:35.610 --> 00:05:39.390 align:middle line:84% I brought out a big canvas like the ones I'd used for the star 00:05:39.390 --> 00:05:43.140 align:middle line:84% being portraits and I prepared the canvas with stucco 00:05:43.140 --> 00:05:46.080 align:middle line:90% and left it to dry. 00:05:46.080 --> 00:05:48.600 align:middle line:84% I was thinking about how to paint the grasshopper 00:05:48.600 --> 00:05:53.910 align:middle line:84% face on in the manner of the star beings. 00:05:53.910 --> 00:05:55.890 align:middle line:84% It presented a difficulty because 00:05:55.890 --> 00:05:58.260 align:middle line:84% of the shape of the grasshopper's head, 00:05:58.260 --> 00:06:00.780 align:middle line:84% so I didn't work on the portrait. 00:06:00.780 --> 00:06:04.110 align:middle line:84% A few days later while I was outside 00:06:04.110 --> 00:06:08.460 align:middle line:84% to watch the rain clouds gather from a hurricane in Mexico, 00:06:08.460 --> 00:06:11.640 align:middle line:84% I noticed another of the big colorful grasshoppers 00:06:11.640 --> 00:06:15.630 align:middle line:84% under the Mesquite tree by the front porch. 00:06:15.630 --> 00:06:18.270 align:middle line:84% It looked me in the eyes and I knew it 00:06:18.270 --> 00:06:23.910 align:middle line:84% once that this grasshopper was a messenger from Lord Chapolin. 00:06:23.910 --> 00:06:25.320 align:middle line:90% Get back to work. 00:06:25.320 --> 00:06:30.000 align:middle line:84% And the word chapolin is the Nahuatl word for grasshopper. 00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:34.140 align:middle line:84% And when I was growing up around Laguna, 00:06:34.140 --> 00:06:38.130 align:middle line:84% the Spanish speaking people, [NON-ENGLSH SPEECH] North 00:06:38.130 --> 00:06:43.440 align:middle line:84% of Laguna, that's what they called grasshoppers, chapolin. 00:06:43.440 --> 00:06:46.170 align:middle line:84% And I even tried to look it up to see 00:06:46.170 --> 00:06:49.410 align:middle line:84% if in Spain, the Spanish Spanish, 00:06:49.410 --> 00:06:52.110 align:middle line:90% had a word for grasshopper. 00:06:52.110 --> 00:06:58.020 align:middle line:84% But it seems like in the new world, chapolin is the term. 00:06:58.020 --> 00:07:01.200 align:middle line:84% It was a messenger from Lord Chapolin. 00:07:01.200 --> 00:07:03.600 align:middle line:90% Get back to work. 00:07:03.600 --> 00:07:06.450 align:middle line:84% I thought a profile was attempting variation 00:07:06.450 --> 00:07:08.100 align:middle line:90% from the portraits I'd done. 00:07:08.100 --> 00:07:10.860 align:middle line:84% So I got out my sketchbook and colored pencils 00:07:10.860 --> 00:07:13.680 align:middle line:84% to attempt to sketch in profile, but I just 00:07:13.680 --> 00:07:15.000 align:middle line:90% couldn't get it right. 00:07:15.000 --> 00:07:18.090 align:middle line:84% Chapolin didn't want a portrait in profile. 00:07:18.090 --> 00:07:22.350 align:middle line:84% He wanted his portrait face on, like the portraits 00:07:22.350 --> 00:07:24.480 align:middle line:90% of the star beings. 00:07:24.480 --> 00:07:28.140 align:middle line:84% I had to work a while to get the face on pose to look right. 00:07:28.140 --> 00:07:31.530 align:middle line:84% At first I drew the eyes on the sides of the grasshopper's 00:07:31.530 --> 00:07:34.090 align:middle line:90% head, but this was incorrect. 00:07:34.090 --> 00:07:36.980 align:middle line:84% The eyes were more to the front of the face. 00:07:36.980 --> 00:07:40.020 align:middle line:84% As I sketched, I understood Chapolin 00:07:40.020 --> 00:07:44.670 align:middle line:84% wanted to be seen and remembered as he was on the big fiesta day 00:07:44.670 --> 00:07:48.120 align:middle line:84% in August, when there were so many good things to eat 00:07:48.120 --> 00:07:51.660 align:middle line:84% and he celebrated by wearing powdered turquoise all 00:07:51.660 --> 00:07:54.360 align:middle line:84% over his head and face out of regard 00:07:54.360 --> 00:08:00.090 align:middle line:84% for Tlaloc, Lord of the Rain, whose color is turquoise. 00:08:00.090 --> 00:08:02.130 align:middle line:84% I relied on my colored pencil sketch 00:08:02.130 --> 00:08:04.470 align:middle line:84% to draw the outline of Chapolin's portrait 00:08:04.470 --> 00:08:05.880 align:middle line:90% on the canvas. 00:08:05.880 --> 00:08:09.630 align:middle line:84% In the sketch, his buckskin leggings and moccasins 00:08:09.630 --> 00:08:10.680 align:middle line:90% could be seen. 00:08:10.680 --> 00:08:15.690 align:middle line:84% But on the canvas, only his head, chest, and waist fit. 00:08:15.690 --> 00:08:17.820 align:middle line:84% I was pleased with the work I'd done, 00:08:17.820 --> 00:08:20.430 align:middle line:84% so I left the portrait for the rest of the week 00:08:20.430 --> 00:08:22.800 align:middle line:84% while I worked on the manuscript. 00:08:22.800 --> 00:08:24.660 align:middle line:90% Another week or two passed. 00:08:24.660 --> 00:08:27.300 align:middle line:84% One day I noticed one of the big painted 00:08:27.300 --> 00:08:32.280 align:middle line:84% grasshoppers on a datura plant outside my studio window. 00:08:32.280 --> 00:08:35.820 align:middle line:84% The grasshopper gazed in at Lord Chapolin's portrait 00:08:35.820 --> 00:08:37.500 align:middle line:90% on the easel. 00:08:37.500 --> 00:08:41.400 align:middle line:84% I felt uneasy, because I'd done no work on the portrait 00:08:41.400 --> 00:08:43.679 align:middle line:90% for a long time. 00:08:43.679 --> 00:08:45.990 align:middle line:84% Then one morning outside my studio 00:08:45.990 --> 00:08:50.370 align:middle line:84% under the Mesquite tree, Lord Chapolin himself approached me. 00:08:50.370 --> 00:08:52.950 align:middle line:84% He came straight toward me and climbed up 00:08:52.950 --> 00:08:57.780 align:middle line:84% from the ground to a sandstone bench to get closer to me. 00:08:57.780 --> 00:09:01.290 align:middle line:84% He regarded me gravely and remained motionless 00:09:01.290 --> 00:09:05.280 align:middle line:84% on the sandstone while I looked at the hues of green, 00:09:05.280 --> 00:09:09.690 align:middle line:84% the magenta pinks and reds, and the black and orange markings 00:09:09.690 --> 00:09:12.780 align:middle line:84% so I'd get them right when I painted him. 00:09:12.780 --> 00:09:15.870 align:middle line:84% Then he lost interest in me and turned his attention 00:09:15.870 --> 00:09:20.730 align:middle line:84% to the rain lilies that stirred in the breeze. 00:09:20.730 --> 00:09:23.220 align:middle line:84% A day or two later as I watered, I 00:09:23.220 --> 00:09:27.480 align:middle line:84% splashed a pot of purple elysium and suddenly there 00:09:27.480 --> 00:09:30.990 align:middle line:84% was Lord Chapolin, indignant and glaring at me. 00:09:30.990 --> 00:09:33.030 align:middle line:90% Forget about your writing. 00:09:33.030 --> 00:09:36.330 align:middle line:90% Complete my portrait. 00:09:36.330 --> 00:09:38.600 align:middle line:84% That night when I went a plug in the lights 00:09:38.600 --> 00:09:41.510 align:middle line:84% under my car to ward off the pack rats, 00:09:41.510 --> 00:09:43.700 align:middle line:84% in the beam of the flashlight I saw 00:09:43.700 --> 00:09:46.640 align:middle line:84% a team of brown ants struggling to carry 00:09:46.640 --> 00:09:49.190 align:middle line:84% a dead grasshopper that resembled the others, 00:09:49.190 --> 00:09:52.670 align:middle line:84% but this one was much smaller with lighter yellow green 00:09:52.670 --> 00:09:57.680 align:middle line:84% hues on the outer wings and light pink on the inner wings. 00:09:57.680 --> 00:10:02.180 align:middle line:84% The grasshoppers wouldn't last much longer. 00:10:02.180 --> 00:10:04.460 align:middle line:84% The next morning, I hurried back to the portrait 00:10:04.460 --> 00:10:07.610 align:middle line:84% before I forgot the pink hue, and I repainted 00:10:07.610 --> 00:10:10.550 align:middle line:84% the dark magenta on the portrait's inner wings 00:10:10.550 --> 00:10:12.740 align:middle line:90% with a lighter magenta pink. 00:10:12.740 --> 00:10:15.650 align:middle line:90% The effect was a rosy magenta. 00:10:15.650 --> 00:10:16.970 align:middle line:90% Perfect. 00:10:16.970 --> 00:10:20.000 align:middle line:90% Exactly what Chapolin desired. 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:24.410 align:middle line:84% I knew what Chapolin desired because he communicated 00:10:24.410 --> 00:10:27.710 align:middle line:84% with certain thoughts that would cross my mind, 00:10:27.710 --> 00:10:30.860 align:middle line:84% thoughts about what he wanted for his portrait, 00:10:30.860 --> 00:10:34.070 align:middle line:90% thoughts he sent directly to me. 00:10:34.070 --> 00:10:37.190 align:middle line:84% At one point, I whited out a lot of dark green color 00:10:37.190 --> 00:10:41.120 align:middle line:84% I didn't like and Chapolin's portrait looked ghostly 00:10:41.120 --> 00:10:44.090 align:middle line:84% and I called it ghost grasshopper. 00:10:44.090 --> 00:10:46.430 align:middle line:84% But I couldn't leave it that way. 00:10:46.430 --> 00:10:51.440 align:middle line:84% Chapolin wanted to be portrayed as he was in life, not death. 00:10:51.440 --> 00:10:53.690 align:middle line:84% Still, the grasshopper figure all 00:10:53.690 --> 00:10:58.670 align:middle line:84% in white on the red background looked really cool. 00:10:58.670 --> 00:11:02.150 align:middle line:84% Lord Chapolin is secretive and mysterious. 00:11:02.150 --> 00:11:06.410 align:middle line:84% Those of his kind may appear only once in 84 years 00:11:06.410 --> 00:11:10.830 align:middle line:84% while others return in cycles of 7 or 21 years. 00:11:10.830 --> 00:11:12.830 align:middle line:84% When the portrait was finally completed 00:11:12.830 --> 00:11:16.340 align:middle line:84% in the last week of October, I opened the front door 00:11:16.340 --> 00:11:18.920 align:middle line:84% one morning and there was Chapolin, 00:11:18.920 --> 00:11:22.580 align:middle line:84% warming himself in the sunlight on the top branches 00:11:22.580 --> 00:11:26.060 align:middle line:84% of the greasewood bush that faced the studio window where 00:11:26.060 --> 00:11:28.070 align:middle line:90% his portrait sat. 00:11:28.070 --> 00:11:30.740 align:middle line:84% I watched him for a while to figure out 00:11:30.740 --> 00:11:34.550 align:middle line:84% whether he liked the portrait, but I couldn't be sure. 00:11:34.550 --> 00:11:38.930 align:middle line:84% So I turned back to paint the white flowers on his belt. 00:11:38.930 --> 00:11:41.810 align:middle line:84% As I touched up the green on the wings, 00:11:41.810 --> 00:11:45.170 align:middle line:84% I felt such happiness and pleasure. 00:11:45.170 --> 00:11:49.460 align:middle line:84% Later when I looked out, he was gone. 00:11:49.460 --> 00:11:53.210 align:middle line:84% I watched for Chapolin and the others whenever I watered. 00:11:53.210 --> 00:11:56.010 align:middle line:84% I even looked for dead grasshoppers, 00:11:56.010 --> 00:12:01.280 align:middle line:84% but they all were gone without a trace, carried off by the ants, 00:12:01.280 --> 00:12:04.580 align:middle line:90% scattered by the wind. 00:12:04.580 --> 00:12:07.830 align:middle line:90% So that'll complete it. 00:12:07.830 --> 00:12:08.960 align:middle line:90% Thank you for leaving-- 00:12:08.960 --> 00:12:10.550 align:middle line:90% I mean, for listening. 00:12:10.550 --> 00:12:11.600 align:middle line:90% For not leaving. 00:12:11.600 --> 00:12:13.100 align:middle line:90% [APPLAUSE] 00:12:13.100 --> 00:12:16.100 align:middle line:90% 00:12:16.100 --> 00:12:17.650 align:middle line:90% Thank you. 00:12:17.650 --> 00:12:23.000 align:middle line:90%