WEBVTT

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When the call came,
Margarita answered.

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I might have been
reading or writing

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in the notebook,
probably on the couch,

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from where I saw her
pace as far from the wall

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as the cord would
allow, turning until it

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was wrapped around her.

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Then, cupping the receiver to
muffle her voice, she said,

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Carolina, can you
go to the seminary?

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Then, without waiting for my
answer, si, si, [SPANISH]..

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Bueno.

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Ciao.

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She was already reaching
for her keys and her purse.

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Bring your camera, she
said, and your notebooks.

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You don't have to look nice.

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They just have to think
you are una periodista.

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What you have on is fine.

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You have to hurry.

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On the way to the
seminary, she told me

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that several hundred
campesinos had fled the army

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and had been given
sanctuary by the church.

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They needed medical
attention, but mostly they

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needed a safe place.

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You must go there in this
moment and be una periodista.

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The army might not attack
if they see una periodista

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from the United States.

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If the army comes, be
sure to let them see you.

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But I'm not a journalist.

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This is not important, Carolina.

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It is your presence
that is needed.

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The people who had crowded into
the courtyard were refugees

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from the combat areas in
San Vincente and Cabañas,

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several hundred of
them, many wounded,

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children with bloody bandages,
women whose breasts had been

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slashed by machetes.

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There was no food for them yet.

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And there were no medicines.

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I was giving a woman
water when a child

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told me that someone was at
the door and asked me to come.

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An American stood there,
gaunt and exhausted,

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with two cameras hanging
from his shoulders.

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He had been called here too.

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His Spanish was fluent,
almost natively so.

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He was with Time magazine.

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That was all he said,
but never mind that.

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We had been told that as soon
as the people were given refuge,

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a rumor flew around that
the soldiers were coming

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and they were going
to kill everyone.

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That's why we'd been called,
the American photographer

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and me, to prevent an
attack, if this could

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be done by our mere
presence I don't remember

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that we exchanged another
word as, one by one,

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we heard the trucks pulling
up near the entrance,

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engines thrumming.

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A seminarian who had been
trying to calm someone down

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told me that it was time.

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I left the water
and stepped outside,

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as did the
photographer, until we

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were visible to the open
trucks, where the soldiers rode

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standing, pointing their rifles
at the clouds, the engines

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idling.

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I heard a whir and click, whir
and click, click, click, click.

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The American was
taking photographs.

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So I opened my notebook and
started to write nonsense,

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looking at the soldiers as
if I were taking down names.

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You could hear the din of the
courtyard from the street,

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crying, shouting.

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The soldiers seemed all to have
mastered a certain demeanor,

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set mouths, hard eyes, helmet
straps over their chins.

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The photographer was
still photographing.

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I didn't want to go any
closer, but they could plainly

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see me writing in the notebook.

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And then, just like
that, one after another,

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the trucks wheezed into
the road and drove away.

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Well, that was close, I
heard the photographer

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say under his breath.

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He removed a film cartridge
and pressed another into place,

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then gave me a look that
said what couldn't be said.

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We went back inside
the courtyard

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and, by then, more
help had come,

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some food and also first aid
supplies, basins and towels

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carried by several nuns
and women I thought

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might be nurses.

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The chaos had become
more orderly, I thought.

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I was going to be sick.

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But there was no place to
do that, so I was not sick.

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This was only from nervousness
that I would later outgrow.

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I was given something to do.

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I don't remember what.

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And when I looked for
the photographer again,

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he was gone.

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I will tell you before I
read this last paragraph

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that now the photographer and I
have been married for 35 years.

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So he's in here, too.

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This is something I
want to share with you.

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It's one, a few
sentences from Leonel.

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And this is for us, for now,
for our time, for where we are.

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And you will know what I mean.

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It isn't the risk of
death or fear of danger

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that prevent people from
rising up, Leonel once said.

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It is numbness, acquiescence,
and the defeat of the mind.

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Resistance to
oppression begins when

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people realize, deeply
within themselves,

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that something
better is possible.

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He also said that what
destroys a society,

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a state, a government,
is corruption.

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That, and the use of
force, which is always

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applied against those who have
not been convinced or included.

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He was always talking
about corruption,

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trying to prevent it,
expose it, eradicate it.

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He was dedicated to the task
of bringing the sin to the eye.

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OK.

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Thank you.

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[APPLAUSE]

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OK.

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